Wife found out.

This topic contains 13 replies, has 12 voices, and was last updated by  LacyGirl 5 days ago.

  • Creator
    Topic
  • #151832

    Melissa S
    Participant
    Registered On: December 16, 2018
    Topics: 2
    Replies: 4
    Has thanked: 10 times
    Been thanked: 8 times

    My wife found out and kicked me out. She has totally refused to ask any questions. She absolutely refuses to even talk to me ..what do I do .

    3 users thanked author for this post.
  • Author
    Replies
  • #160603
     LacyGirl 
    Participant
    Registered On: March 4, 2019
    Topics: 0
    Replies: 9
    Has thanked: 5 times
    Been thanked: 4 times

    Melissa,

    I’m in the same situation. My wife of 38 years knew about my dressing 15 months ago and finally decided that she couldn’t live with or be married to a man who Crossdresses. This happened a month h ago after being kicked out of the house in early January. My suggestions are to reach out to your trusted friends for help and pray!

  • #160210
     Lilly 
    Participant
    Registered On: December 12, 2018
    Topics: 4
    Replies: 146
    Has thanked: 189 times
    Been thanked: 157 times

    All I can say is that my fiance nearly walked away from me because I was hiding something from her. It wasn’t about the dresses, just saying. I got a counselor to work on my communication with my wife and to make sure our trust was built back up, and I’m committed to no more hiding, and that includes some rather uncomfortable-but-healthy self-realizations and acceptance.

    Again it had little to nothing to do with the dresses.

  • #160145
     Khloe West 
    Participant
    Registered On: August 27, 2015
    Topics: 1
    Replies: 79
    Has thanked: 96 times
    Been thanked: 32 times

    Roll with it – be honest – and be your best!

    I went through similar after nearly 3 decades of marriage in a situation the I didn’t even know that I had the “affliction”.

    After the then near 30 years of marriage? How lucky am I that she buys or suggests “cute things” for me to wear?

  • #154187
     eleanor holborn 
    Ambassador
    Registered On: September 23, 2018
    Topics: 165
    Replies: 181
    Has thanked: 75 times
    Been thanked: 182 times

    Hi hun

    As a SO it is a difficult situation when you find out your whole world collapses round you glad you have started. Time paitence  are the key

    1 user thanked author for this post.
  • #154185
     Melissa S 
    Participant
    Registered On: December 16, 2018
    Topics: 2
    Replies: 4
    Has thanked: 10 times
    Been thanked: 8 times

    Here is an update.  We are starting to talk.she agrees that we do need to sit down together before anything permanent happens so here is hoping things work out.  To answer your girls questions I just like wearing girl clothes I have no desire to do anything other than that.  Honestly I don’t think I could fool anyone even if I tried but I’m ok with that.  Honestly if I had to choose either to dress or keep her I would choose her in a heartbeat. Not going to lie it would be hard to give this side of me up though.

    1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #160213
       Lilly 
      Participant
      Registered On: December 12, 2018
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 146
      Has thanked: 189 times
      Been thanked: 157 times

      I just want to say I’m 100% in your camp. Let’s be real here I’m 6’4″ and 220lbs I’m not a small human.

      I have no desire to pass, I feel like a man, and I love wearing women’s clothes in my own private time.

      I am not saying this to project onto anyone else, we all are who we are, I’m just saying that so you know it can absolutely be a thing. You’re not alone! I don’t even like wigs or makeup. It’s fun but like, just give me a dress please thank you.

      Glad to hear the two of you are talking. Seriously I hope it works out, you’ll probably confront some internal stuff like you never have before, but if you love her, fight for her, but don’t sacrifice yourself or who you are. Dressing is what I do and what I will do, but I am a husband first. Ya dig?

      Good luck and I mean that I wish you the best! I can message you my own story there too it’s like… whoa almost had my life collapse around me don’t want to get into specifics but I’m still working through it all just saying you should not feel alone and that talking about it can help a lot.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
  • #151876
     sandra louise saunders 
    Participant
    Registered On: January 26, 2019
    Topics: 0
    Replies: 74
    Has thanked: 119 times
    Been thanked: 50 times

    I agree with Veronica her reaction was a bit extreme but it probably came as a big shock to her. When the dust has settled she may relent and if she does reassure her you do not want to transition but would like to dress occasionally if she agrees. Again though it does sound like it is final. Best of luck. Sandra Louise xx

  • #151868
     Michelle 
    Participant
    Registered On: October 12, 2017
    Topics: 0
    Replies: 2
    Has thanked: 0 times
    Been thanked: 0 times

    Found out.

    I went through this a few months ago. If you can get her to talk, be honest with her and yourself. Explain to her how you feel and what your true intentions are for the future should you get back together. Now that you have been exposed let your lite shine.

    Michelle

  • #151862
     rebekka moore 
    Participant
    Registered On: January 7, 2017
    Topics: 43
    Replies: 491
    Has thanked: 205 times
    Been thanked: 440 times

    Sorry to hear that, Melissa.

    Good time for both of you to reflect and determine where you want things to go.  She obviously has things to work out but hard as it can be, so do you.

    You need to consider where you want to go with dressing.  It is something you want to do often, in the privacy of your own surroundings?  Do you have long term plans or desires to transition, in even the least?  Lots to think about in the midst of everything else.

    Gurls life is never easy!

    Love and hugs,

    Rebekka

  • #151861
     Davida Mae 
    Participant
    Registered On: January 14, 2019
    Topics: 3
    Replies: 84
    Has thanked: 5 times
    Been thanked: 54 times

    “Peace is Prefered – Prepared is Prudent” as a Crossdresser/ Closet Gurl your circumstances are constantly on my mind. Forgive me if this comes across Flipiant, “I hope for the Best, expect the Worst and live the Result” I find weighing the potential cost hasn’t quieted DAVIDA’s Desire to “Be” in the slightest. My Very Best to YOU during this time. “ Stay Sweet, Stay Stylish for the WIN!

  • #151851
     Olivia Livin 
    Participant
    Registered On: October 22, 2018
    Topics: 9
    Replies: 514
    Has thanked: 542 times
    Been thanked: 360 times

    Hi Mellissa,

    I tend to agree with Mandy, when confronted with this kind of thing. They can be completely overwhelmed, lash out, and require the necessary time to try and process things. I do hope that there is someone, family member or friend who can be there for both of you, and build a bridge for at least some conversation.

    Hoping things can work out, best of luck

  • #151843
     Mandy Cross 
    Participant
    Registered On: October 6, 2018
    Topics: 9
    Replies: 112
    Has thanked: 220 times
    Been thanked: 164 times

    Is there someone who could speak to her on your behalf? Even if it’s to just mediate as far as getting you both to a marriage guidance counselor?

    I think if you can’t open some form of dialogue there isn’t much you can do. She may also just need some time to digest things, calm down etc. If she didn’t know at all this has probably been a huge shock to her.

    Before you were caught were you ok together or were there other troubles?

    Mx

  • #151838
     Dame Veronica Graunwolf 
    Participant
    Registered On: May 8, 2017
    Topics: 38
    Replies: 1645
    Has thanked: 1375 times
    Been thanked: 1161 times

    Sounds to me like she wanted to get rid of you and was looking for any excuse. Guess you know now that you should go out on your own…..get a good lawyer right away.

    Dame Veronica

    2 users thanked author for this post.

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account