Who Are We?

I heard a newscaster ask one day “Just who are crossdressers we hear about from time to time?” It started me thinking about that very question and the more I thought, the more I decided it might be a good idea to put it down on paper. Here are the results.

To start with, let’s first make it crystal clear who we are not.

We are not those people you see regularly on the Jerry Springer show. Yes, they put on a dress and profess to be crossdressers. But they’re a far cry from a real crossdresser. The problem is that this tiny group of people are the very ones who are in the limelight and produce all the negative images that are so degrading to those of us who aren’t that way at all. We are not the perverts, child molesters, murderers or sensationalists seen on TV, internet news and read about in the news every day either.

So Who Are WE?

We’re the doctors who have performed life-saving operations upon you and your loved ones. We’re the airline pilots who have taken the responsibility for your safety at 600 mph going up to 40,000 feet. We’re the dentists who relieved your toothache or attended to your braces so you would have a pretty smile and healthy teeth. We’re the policemen who risk our lives daily to keep you safe from the criminal element that is so rampant in our society today. We’re the soldiers who have gone to battle and returned home missing a foot, hand, arm, leg, or worse yet come home in a cold steel box. We’re people in the trades such as carpenters, electricians, and plumbers who built the house you live in. We’re the politicians all the way from the mayors of the smallest towns to senators, congressmen, and high-ranking military leaders.

Some of us were at Pearl Harbor on Dec 7, 1941. Or in the World Trade Center on 9/11 when tragedy struck home. And some of us were the fireman and emergency medical technicians who were inside those three buildings when they collapsed. Yet others were those of us who faced the gruesome task of recovering the bodies we could find and mourning those we couldn’t.

We’re the truck drivers who sacrifice weeks at a time away from home delivering your goods and services. We’re the farmers who work to keep food on your table. We’re the teachers who educated you and who are now educating your children. We’re your pastors and Sunday school teachers. We’re the common citizens who rolled up our sleeves and gave blood when disaster strikes. We’re the ones who cared enough to donate our organs in order to save lives. When that tornado or flood or whatever other disasters come along, we were the ones who neglected our own needs and dug in to help everybody else. We’re the ones who were out in the cold, rain and lightening the night that awful storm came through and knocked out all the power just so you wouldn’t freeze to death. We’re the mechanics who fixed your vehicle; the construction workers who built the roads you drive on everyday. We’re the waiters who served your meal when you went out to dinner last week. We’re the ambulance drivers who got you to the hospital safely after that bad crash. We’re the friends and neighbors who supported you and gave you a shoulder to cry on when a loved one passed away. We’re the drivers who cared enough to stop and see if we could help you when your vehicle quit and left you stranded on the roadside that cold and rainy night.  Remember that star quarterback that scored the winning touchdown in the biggest football game of the season? That’s right, he is a crossdresser also. And let’s not forget about his teammates and coach. Football isn’t the only team we’re members of.

We Touch Your Lives Every Day.

Who Are We? We are everybody and everyone. Crossdressing crosses all barriers of race, creed, age, national origin and social status. Realizing that 10% of the male population crossdresses to some extent makes it pretty obvious that you know several of us. You just aren’t aware of it because society has not yet educated itself about us. There remains a great deal of ignorance within society about crossdressing. Until society Does acknowledge that we are no more abnormal than any of the rest of its average members, we are forced to maintain our anonymous position.

Crossdressing is not a disease and it’s not something to be fearful of. It’s not contagious so you won’t have to be concerned about someone passing it on to you. It’s something one is born with. The primary reason for crossdressing is to provide an outwardly visible outlet of expression to an invisible inward feeling and emotion. It has nothing at all to do with one’s sexual persuasion; (I just find crossdressing relaxing from everyday stress).

The next time you see someone pointing an accusing finger at a crossdresser, poking fun at them and proclaiming them to be a freak/pervert/fag, stop and think about this. What if that crossdresser happened to be one of those people listed above who possibly did something in the past that saved your life or that of someone you love. Just how perverted was that person at that time?

Going a step further, what if this person is one destined to save your life next week? When we were born we didn’t have a choice about being that one in every ten who would become a crossdresser.

With this in mind. I leave you with the following. What if the person pointing their finger had been that one in ten who was born a crossdresser? Something to think long and hard about. Isn’t It.

Missie Cook

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Missie Cook

Like so many other guy's who have a strong fem side.

Latest posts by Missie Cook (see all)


Leave a reply

  1. Andrea Adlerberg 10 months ago

    Missie: You hit a home run with this article. I can add nothing more to all the supportive comments on this list. Well done !


    • Author
      Missie Cook 10 months ago

      Hello Andrea
      You and all the sisters out there deserve all the credit. Living the life and walking in your shoes is the real credit.
      Thank You Andrea

  2. Regan Newman 10 months ago

    What a beautiful article ! Thank you Missie.

  3. Joseph Escobedo 10 months ago

    Missie : Right on target and too all my sisters I’m an avid reader from all your comments and the more I read give me true meaning of sisterhood we are all together on this journey and helps all of us in staying alive in need of just for a minute to feel as a lady , in our line of work to have conspicuous women attire even slightly and a bit of makeup makes our day . With this technology I’m new and getting to use it with emails but very cautious either my wife opens or start learning to open my mail or asking questions , in the meantime I thank CDH for opening this window for us , and I’m ready joining my CDH Sisterhood.

  4. Rob Perry 10 months ago

    Very well said

  5. Asmi 9 months ago

    Very true and very well written. We do touch so many lives and yes, we are everywhere. (Oh, 1 in 10 was a surprise for me.) I am from India and no one ‘trained’ me or induce me to dress. As you said, its the journey or the process—somewhat like meditation—that relaxes you.

    I have been lurking—for various reasons—for very long, but I guess, I have no reason for not being a regular here. I may not be able to dress as often as I like, but I can be in good company without any apprehension or fear of being judged.

  6. Marie Sweets 9 months ago

    Thank You Missie, great article. We are NOT alone in our journey. Here supporting each other.

  7. Lucinda Hawkns 9 months ago

    hello Missie thanks for that letter, you should write a book, you write very well and have all the words to put down on a book never gave it a thought of who we are until i ready our your story. so true, we are every one, even woman cross dress now days, they don’t wear dresses or skirts and wear make up now days they wear pants and shirt and sneakers, no make up, short hair, maybe some perfume. so what is so wrong with us men cross dressing and showing our fem side????

  8. Michelle M 9 months ago

    Hi Missie, thank you for helping me get a better understanding on what I am, who we are. I’m just staring to put the pieces together, they’re small pieces, but your article has helped.

  9. Christine V 9 months ago

    Another common misconception you forgot to add is that not only are we not all perverts and pedophiles we’re also not all gay. That’s a huge misconception a lot of people have. I got asked if I played for that team once when I revealed to somebody that I was a crossdresser. I’ve also been asked if I plan on becoming a woman. No and no to both questions. To me it’s just fun to be somebody else on occasion and I have deep admiration for women and the beautiful clothes they wear.

    • Author
      Missie Cook 9 months ago

      Hello Christine
      Thank You for reading Who Are We. I totally agree with you about the other categories people try to put cross dressers in. Every one see’s talk shows like Jerry Springer for of cross dresser, were not those cross dressers. They don’t realize were normal people everywhere! Cross dressers are in every country. In all walks of life. In all back grounds. In all Professions. In the military. In government.


  10. Sahi saheli 8 months ago

    An eye opener to people who looking at us who call names when we go out wearing femme dress.Rightly said about our life that we very normal and have inner expression of being a woman .Thanks a lot for morale booster article please keep inspiring us folks who are

    lost in our world which

    you called tiny
    With love

  11. Jasmine Fletcher 5 months ago

    Well said Missie. Just imagine if we all decided to be brave one day and went out and about dressed how we want en masse. I think everyone (including ourselves) would be surprised at how many of us there are, and as you have pointed out in your article, who we are!
    We must remember only 100 years ago a woman wearing trousers would have been considered crossdressed and could have suffered abuse and even arrested. It was illegal in many parts of the world (and most likely still is somewhere). Change may come for us as well but I guess we are all part of helping to make that happen.

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