I grew up in an atmosphere where boys were expected to be boys. So I did all the macho things right up to my mid 30’s. I was the all outdoor boy, skiing, hiking, rock-climbing, car racing, endurance ski races, ocean sailing. All the while as was doing my macho thing I wanted to be feminine. I hid my desires well. No one knew. I married and then things became problematic. I longed to wear nightgowns and peignoirs. Finally one night I went to bed in a nightgown. My wife, understandably, had a fit. But that was the beginning. So separate rooms were the order. For years i slept in some gorgeous nighties. Oh yes, I also wore a bra and Brest forms. I was in heaven. Then after 50 years of marriage my wife died very suddenly of cancer. After awhile I re-married and my wife of now accepts my need and so I can dress two days per week and I have a lovely wardrobe. I can not go out in public, though I long to do so, However I am thankful that I can wear my clothes on a semi regular basis. I feel I ma blessed. I long to be with ladies like me but, that will never be. Just know I envy those of you who can meet, walk, be seen in public. Love to you all. Katerina.
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