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Unlike many of you I read about here, I cannot maintain a wardrobe. I am married, and she doesn’t know….
As a result, I rarely get a chance to wear anything feminine, let alone a complete outfit..
My greatest fear is getting caught. So, for self protection, I have nothing.
When I traveled for work, I could keep a few lingerie items hidden in a suitcase that she never touched.
So, all of this said, I am jealous of you, for having women’s clothing you keep.
Marsha
Marsha, no need to deny yourself of girly things, get a hiding place! If your wife is a bit lazy, like mine, you can have a fool proof place for your feminine things!
I have the same problems however my wife has become pretty independent and will go out of state to craft fairs to sell the crafty things she makes. This allows me to use the things I bought to get my girly on. Having a place to store all of Candy’s things are important. I have a drop ceiling in my attic office and there is conduit, and heating and air conditioning ducts running all over up there. So between the joists I have faux duct work that are as big as dresser drawers to keep my girly things in!
Sorry the site will not accept my pictures so you will just have to read….You can get the 14″x 6″ duct work angles and end caps at Menards or any big box store. It comes in parts that you can assemble. They also have hangers…just cut out holes in the tops, bend the metal edges and walla!!!!!….. hideable dresser drawers! Great for hiding money, guns, ammo too!
I also have a grab-n-go unisex bag (the plaid bag)I keep all my things I want to wear on my next outing available in a secure panel for easy access….
So sisters….that is all it takes to have your cake and eat it too…well…you get the idea! Now, go out and buy some lingerie! You know you want to!
Marsha, Candice,
I just read your comments and it make me realise how lucky I am not needing to hide anything from my wife. And I wonder how I would deal with it if I had to keep it secret. I don’t know if I could manage it.
If you don’t mind me asking: isn’t there a moment where you feel like you need to talk to her about that (not like actually doing it, but wishing it very hard).
If you have a home office, maybe stuff a few outfits behind your books or bookshelf, or the back of your file cabinet drawer or under your desk in a nondescript box surrounded with “junk”. I have two boxes in the garage surrounded by heavy ones and a junky one on top. One box has my clothes, and the other one has my “go bag”. Karley time is precious LOL. You may be jealous of us but one thing you have is occasional travel, where you can dress up , be out and about and strike up casual conversations! ,,,,mmmmm……I think you are the lucky one!!,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Karley
Marsha,
I feel the exact same way. I have looked for good hiding spots but inevitably have to get rid of anything I have because I haven’t taken the necessary precautions. One thing I am doing is actually taking the precautions now. I have a good spot that she will never know about. Sometimes I feel like I want to leave something out so I am forced to have the talk. I am now at the point where I want to express myself. I don’t know what will come of the conversation if I have it, but at least I will be in the open finally.
i know that probably doesn’t help but at least you aren’t the only one dealing with it.
In my teens I dolled up in a dress,full makeup, a hair piece, and heels. I love pretending to be the woman I always thought I should be. I was parading around the house in my heel and the door bell rang. I looked out the window to see if anyone was in the driveway but there was no one there.
The door bell rang a half dozen more times and I just figured it was the paper boy coming to collect for delivery. He would always do this if no one answered. So I decided to open the door and let him see how lovely I looked in my dress. When I opened the door there stood my Uncle. He look a me for several minutes before calling my name.
Needless to say I begged him not to tell my parents. My Dad was real strict and he spanked me with his belt if
I was bad.I was beyond lucky when I was caught, i had been dressing in my moms things almost daily after school. I loved it, of course i could never get things back correctly. I was supposed to go stay with my very cool aunt three weeks in December while mom and her boyfriend were away. Aunt came to pick me up but would spend the weekend with us first.
That Friday night was pajama and movie night. My aunt mentioned to my mom i did not have pajamas, mom said she could fix that. She then pull out the nightgown and robe I wore all the time with her pantyhose and panties. Asked if i would like to wear it, i said no way, she said “why not, you wear it all theme when you are alone”
Long story short, my mom and Aunt transformed me the next day into a cute teenage girl, the took me shopping. I got to spend all three weeks with my aunt as a girl. when I came mom, mom let me dress.
I love when I’m able to be home as Sami. This time doesnt always happen so when it does, I make sure I can enjoy every minute. I had decided that I was going to take my dressing to another level amd actually leave the house dressed. As soon as I was dressed, the doorbell rang and I looked oit the window but didnt see anyone. Stayed quiet in the house for a minute or two and decided to leave. The minute I stepped on the porch, I sawmy neighbor and he looked at me like he saw a ghost. Since then, I havent attempted to go out of the house except for the other week and that experience was awful as well. Do I gice it more time?
Having got caught when I was underdressing and seen the reaction from my wife there is no way that I am going tohave a talk abut was has become a wider desire in the wearing of “female” clothing. I have a location which is sufficiently to hand for some careful underdresssing of slightly fuller dressing when I only have a couple of hours available to me but would be vulnerable to being found if I was away from home for too long and my wife decised to do extensivve tidying up / cleaning. So I have an alternative location for the full collection which I access when home alone that is in a I position where my wife would not have occasion to go to.
I envy those Gurls that are at least in an open position with their SO but it does seem that I am in a better position than some.
Rachel
I got caught on the point if c…..ing by our granddaughter. It happened as we were chatting about why i was dressed. Cute her!
Marsha, Thank you for this post and poll. Since you travel for work, I have a suggestion. Another CDH sister by the name of Caty (from Australia) stores her wardrobe in a climate controlled storage rental. It would be a great way to keep your clothes secret and you could pick them up before you leave town.
I live alone, no SO so I don’t need to hide anything and dress when I want which is typically every day.
Marsha, my wife doesn’t know either so I also keep my wardrobe, makeup and wigs in a climate controlled storage unit. It is only a few miles from my home and works well for me. I do not know if it would work for you, but an idea to consider.
Married and I dress at home all the time. no hiding anything. Never been caught when out……. I think. lol
Caught what?
Are you doing something illegal?
As a cross dresser, I am not doing anything illegal in my country – which is very lucky for me!
So I have several wardrobes worth of lovely garments in drawers beside my bed.
My wife isn’t keen – I’d really like her to be, but I don’t control her any more than she controls me (weasel words alert!).
I’ve packed a huge case with lovely new items for my upcoming Brighton excursion this Saturday *excited leap!!!*.
As I have agreed not to dress around the kids (for the time being, until I can bring myself to the most difficult conversations…), my Brighton time is precious.
But my dressing is no secret from my wife, and she can look at my lovely clothes any time she likes.
Sadly, she does not like to.
Although I think I see little rays of acceptance forming, like first shoots in spring, I will not push them or over-water them.
I will trust that the flowers I desire to see will bloom in good time.
Love Laura
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The quote is what I posted about a year ago with a different but similar user name. Carelessly I accumulated too many new purchases in my immediate go to hiding place and was observed going to it too often. My wife checked the location whilst I was out of the house one morning and challenged me on it on my return home. Result another difficult discussion and my wife threatening a split and going off to stay with our daughter to decide on next moves. Result another purge and agreement to undertake counselling and reactivating other dormant interests as a distraction / substitute. The immediate go to stash had some items that showed my interest in female clothing had gone wider than just panties and camis but did not include things like my shoes and dresses but everything went in the purge.The fact that I am back on CDH shows that I was not able to push it fully out of my mind but am far more cautious about the extent of what I have and do not make any attempt at underdressing with dressing only possible when my SO is away which is very rare. Certainly no close access storage of items and what I do have has to be capable of being bundled up in a bag for placing in a location that she will not go to. But when the opportunity does arise it is a nice feeling to see the only dress on a hanger and the satin chemise hanging on the back of the bathroom door.
Rachel
I have a few things, not what most would consider a full wardrobe. They are in a particular drawer, not exactly hidden, but not out in the open either. My wife knows I have lingerie and a couple skirts, but I dont know how much she knows. Like I said, I don’t make it obvious. My one long dress is hanging with my suits, not hidden, but I have no idea if she has ever noticed it, my guess is she has not.
I have a full wardrobe dresses heels nylons tight makeup wigs everything a Girl wants but I have a storage locker about a mile from the house with a dresser in it whenever Jasmine wants to go out I just have to take an overnight bag LOL kiss kiss girls jazz 💋💋
Ever since I was a kid, I just had a sense for finding secret hiding places for stuff. For years, I kept my girly stuff hidden (or so I think I have) when living at home with my parents. Being married and keeping a secret stash can feel harder mainly because of the feeling that being caught would be so destructive. It took me years before I came out to my wife, and years before my secret stash moved to be somewhere not so secret.
If you’re looking for ideas…
If you have your own car, the trunk has many little compartments under the floor, including the spare tire area. In a house, behind cabinets, mislabeled boxes (like “old school papers”), even under the couch can be great places to store things. It all really depends on how noticing your spouse is (mine tends to enjoy messes and never looks through my stuff, so hiding things over the years was easy).
Before turning 15, I had a couple of pretty good stash sites in the bedroom. When I shared a bedroom with my sister, if the clothes I was wearing came from her outgrown donations, I would just fold them and put them in a sack or box and put that in the back corner of our shared closet. They were found a couple of times, but usually came with the comment like ‘I thought we gave those to Goodwill.’ or similar, and though it did hurt at the time to see them go, I never spoke up to claim them.
When we finally had our own bedrooms, I still used her closet for the things I used that had been hers. I found a space under the bottom drawers of my dresser, about 4″ high and the full length of it. Access was through removing one or both drawers and them moving the panel under them to open the space.
After I turned 15, I was ‘involved’ with my first man crush/lover, and kept all my clothing at His home, to which he gave me a key in case he was not home, and would spend the vast majority of my time with him, dressed as Paula and in absolute CD heaven. Vincent did make do all my homework and made sure I studied and did what was expected to not raise questions.
My first car had a large duffle in the trunk for a lot fo clothing to, but those were just casuals like jeans and t-shirts (definitely girl things though).
I know live in mom’s house and have three bedroom closets to keep filled, and I separate all my clothes by season. Most of my family knows so it is no big deal for them to see my wardrobe and the same goes for my friends I have over.
PaulaF
This certainly presents a problem for many and I sympathize for those in this position. I too am in this position-however I have been in a unique situation for some time now.
For about 3.5 years I rented a “space” in an apartment of crossdressers. We each had a large closet section and could go dress on scheduled times. No one lived here BTW. This was a huge turning point in my evolution and growth for Sandy. Sadly there were not enough people interested to cover costs and this ended.
I had a brief time that I was homeless to speak but a better opportunity came soon.
A wonderful woman I meet working at Lancome and I became friends and I ended up renting a “Closet” from her. It has been a fantastic situation and I am part of her family and others she knows who visit. I can dress when I wish and have fashion and makeup advise just by asking.
I went Saturday before heading to the mall for sale shopping then off to see a dear friend for lunch.
A magical day!
Sandy
Hey I travel a lot for work and WordPress up in the hotels but after the last time I purge all my outfits of course now I regret it terribly
Hey I travel a lot for work and Would dress up in the hotels but after the last time I purge all my outfits of course now I regret it terribly
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