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I believe to understand this post fully it would be profitable to visit my post from earlier this year and especially read the replies from Gwen Liefde.
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/forums/topic/what-do-you-really-think-now-that-you-know/
If you have followed the link and read what was there you have labored at length. Thank you. Therefore, I will keep this short.
Between Gwen’s candid replies and our PM exchange I received some life changing advice. I worked the “program” as instructed for my personal circumstances. It took time, pursuit of my wife’s needs as equal to or more important than my own, commitment to love regardless of the outcome, patience and caring. All this took time . . . yet when all such groundwork was in place the moment of full disclosure created itself. Our conversation (my wife and myself) was honest, emotional, brave (on her part) and ended exceptionally well. I was completely unprepared; blind sided to be sure with her acceptance and support, which is best summed up with her statement, “and so what can I do to help you be the happy woman you want to be.” The proverbial, ” never in a million years” applies.
CDH is a wonderful place to receive support and advice. Once received it is ours to apply. And once applied we may be pleasantly surprised and helped by what is given back to us.
Oh I am so glad that I was taught that disclosure is equally about meeting your SO needs as it is about meeting your own. That principle applied continually, I am sure will grow a very comfortable future for both of us as I grow in my own femininity.
Blessings,
Charrie
I am ever so happy, for Both of you Charlene.
We do all the preperation over and over again, when the time is right it just spills out.
Your mental path will be so much clearer for it and the joy of having that burden lifted will be evident day after day. Yes it certainly requires a balance, but far easier to maintain than being on the tightrope of the past. We need to be thankful, and express it often, for having them in our lives and loving us enough to continue being by our side. That honest communication can and hopefully will bring you even closer together as you move forward.
Thank you for sharing this with us,
Olivia
Charlene,
I know exactly how you felt. My wife surprised me with her support and acceptance as well. Her anger stemmed from me having kept it secret from her. I will admit that it is still a work in practice, (it has been 4 years). However, it is a work in which we are both heavily involved.
MacKenzie Alexandra
Hi Charlene,
I am glad of your wifes acceptance and support.
Now that you have it be careful how you apply it.
My wife was accepting and supportive,however as the pink fog came it I became obsessed with my feminine side and I didn’t see how it was affecting my spouse.
So always try to keep her in your mind sweety.
Its so easy to be totally immersed in your femininity but as a married spouse we have a responsibility to them as well.
I know you seem very aware of this.
Just a friendly reminder from experience.
Patty
Dear Charlene,
I know I already responded to you in PM, but I am so happy for you. It is awesome that your wife if being accepting and supportive. I truly believe the secret to a good relationship is being honest, kind, compassionate, respectful and to communicate. By you taking to heart the advice and perspective I shared with you, you affirmed your love for your wife. By making sure your relationship and her needs are just as important, you’ve setup a good foundation to work from with the disclosure of crossdressing. At the end of the day we all want to feel wanted, needed and loved. I wish you a happy, healthy and successful relationship and life.
Sincerely,
Gwenn
P.S. does she know about CDH and the forum post or article?
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