I wish shopping was easier

This topic contains 23 replies, has 20 voices, and was last updated by  Cary Benson 2 months, 1 week ago.

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    Vanessa Marie
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    Registered On: May 11, 2018
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    I wish I had the courage to walk into a women’s clothing store as a man and feel comfortable enough to buy something for myself. I always feel like I’d be caught. I would like to think if I was asked about it, I can say it’s for my wife. But then, my wife is much shorter than me so that cover can only work for so much.  And don’t get me started on shoes! I can never find size 13 shoes anywhere in town!

    So of course I shop online, but it would be nice if I could find something, try it on and where it at home the same day without being embarrassed.

    What are your struggles with this?

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  • #102217
     Cary Benson 
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    Registered On: February 24, 2018
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    I have been nervous too but I have been doing this a long time.   I love to shop at Macy’s  I go in to try on bras panties slips camisoles.    Over the years I have heard only once or twice comments from others I just ignore it I am here to spend some money .  I pick out the items I want to try on walk over to the fitting rooms & walk in to find empty one & close & lock the door then I just proceed to try on all the items I want to check fit of . It’s amazing how much difference bras bands are when size (42B) is the same from different brands  My best luck is Bali, Playtex, Vanity Fair, Wacoal that’s why I love to check the fit of what I want . My latest was going in for new bras I wore in one my favorite bras with my breast forms in covered it with a lose shirt & vest & walked in found the bras I wanted & went to the fitting rooms & proceed to try them on .  I bought 3 of them I know they know they were for me I bought because they were on sale for about 60% off super deal for me!   I loved that & really had fun finding what I wanted !  Macy’s has been very good to me & they just want to sell merchandise .

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    #102175
     Michelle Liefde 
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    Registered On: May 27, 2018
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    Hi Vanessa, I am struggling with that too! I keep trying to overcome that fear and shyness but everytime I work up enough nerve, I seem to find an excuse not to shop.  And I totally understand about the shoes, ugh!

    #101816
     Marie Bardinot 
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    Registered On: December 26, 2017
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    I just walk in and shop, used to get nervous and still do a little at times, but its a lot easier now. Someone mentioned shoes are tough, but for me I wear a women’s size 9 so its easier for me to get shoes.

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    #101487
     Marie Sweets 
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    Registered On: May 6, 2018
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    Hi Girls, For those that feel shy or embarrassed when shopping in the women’s section in ‘male mode’. Please let us know how you get on, after us ‘girls’ have given you some support & encouragement. Be positive and positive things will happen. Have a great weekend Ladies.

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    #101485
     Marie Sweets 
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    Registered On: May 6, 2018
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    Hi Jamie Noir, it does get easier. For those that shop for lingerie etc in male mode. The more we shop the more confident one will get. I don’t worry what others think. I do it for myself. Know what you want to buy, before going to the store. That way one will not draw attention to yourself. Be confident and pleasant. You will find that the sales staff will give a positive comment. I was told one time when I purchased a nightie that the colour suited me. All the best with your shopping Jamie.

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    #101456
     Jamie Noir 
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    Registered On: May 31, 2018
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    I shop in person. I still feel butterfly’s when I first walk in. I think it’s mostly that somebody I know will see me. I try to drive to an area that will limit the chances of being recognized. I swear to God just today I bought some foundation from a store and when I drove off – I saw a person I knew from high school (she now is a beautiful woman) going in the store.

    I have bought dresses, bras, pantyhose, shoes, makeup (that’s the easiest) from stores. For some reason shoes are the most awkward. Nordstrom Rack and Payless has size 13 (for Payless you might have visit one in a more urban area). Places like Walmart (for undies) – they have self check-out.

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    #100984
     Anonymous
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    Ill go into womens sections all the time, im not there to please anyone but myself.

    They don’t know who you are shopping for and what reason. Ive gone into cosmetic shops and bought items all the time.

    Im not saying they wouldnt know what im doing with it, im saying that you shouldnt be embarrassed by getting things you like without the gawkers and judgementalists.

    When I am out, i go in male mode. I havent decided if I want to go public yet in lady mode.

    😊

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    #100983
     Rochelle Mooney 
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    Registered On: October 27, 2016
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    I was worried a little, when I first started shopping for myself. Until I walked into a store that sells only women’s clothing. I took a dress off the rack, and was asked by the sales lady, if I would like a changing room. I was dressed as just a normal man. Imagine my surprise. I just looked at her, and said that would be lovely. No further comments were made.

    Rochelle

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    #100971
     Ronnie Me 
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    Registered On: May 24, 2018
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    I know what you mean. I always hate getting exited about a new dress just to have it arrive and can’t get it to zip up.

    #99894
     Allyson Nicole 
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    Registered On: April 28, 2018
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    I have been shopping in thrift stores recently. Oten find some adorable outfits and best of all inexspensive. Only once did a cashier ask if I found what I needed and then said the blouses I had should look cute. Wasn’t sure where she was going with that but had a big smile and then winked saying see you again soon.

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    #99816
     Alexandria Divine 
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    Registered On: April 16, 2018
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    I bought a pair of pink flats online from long tall sally, and to save on shipping I had them sent to the store. Of course, that meant I had to walk into a women’s store and say “I need to pick up the shoes I ordered.”

    I did just that this afternoon and the sky didn’t fall. The associate who helped me was very friendly, and asked if I wanted to try them on first or just take them home. I opted to just take them home, but as soon as I got to my car I regretted not taking the opportunity to try them on in the store.

    Next time…

    (They look great, btw)

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    #99633
     Shelley Snapdragon 
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    Registered On: April 22, 2018
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    I was out recently in male mode. Purchased some capri’s and a top. Waited until the dressing room cleared to try them on. Nervous for sure but i had to take the next step. Funny when cashing out the cashier (female) asked me if i needed a gift receipt. No there for me i replied!!!Oops i got a shoulder bag too! Getting more relaxed everytime!

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    #99630
     The shadow of Samantha Sang 
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    Registered On: January 21, 2018
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    Hello Vanessa!  It gets easier the more you do it, like anything.  I’ve had 20 years of practice at this point.  Before, it was nerve-wracking.  Nowadays, I only feel an occasional twinge of nerves.

    I try to go in there with an idea of what I’m trying to find, so as not to linger too long and look out of place.  Now as to other shoppers…occasionally I draw giggles from those younger than I.  Never from those in my same age range.  The younger ones are ignorant and lack life experience so I forgive them, whatever man.  I used to plan out the “it’s for my girlfriend” or whatever excuse but lately I just roll with it.  Eventually you come to the point where it just doesn’t matter anymore.  I’ve never had a sales clerk who wasn’t friendly although sometimes they want to be a touch snarky and that’s fine too.  The best example was when I bought a pair of furry women’s pajama pants like you may see on the racks in the winter.  The young male cashier said , “Those will look great on you.”  I said, “I bet you’d love to see that, wouldn’t you?”  He actually blushed and didn’t say another word.

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    #99629
     Vanessa Marie 
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    Bianca,

    You make a good point. I’m so caught up in my head that I don’t think I could just play it off with humor. I really want to get to that point. I just need to step out of my shell.

    Thanks,

    Vanessa

    #99628
     Bianca Everdene 
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    Registered On: April 11, 2017
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    Hi Vanessa Marie

    I too was terrified at first when shopping in person for clothes, make up etc. After a while I realised people don’t really care, they are too wrapped up in their own lives, and the shop assistants want the sale.

    Last year I saw a beautiful Summer dress in a local supermarket and knew I had to have it, so I drove to another branch of the store in another town where I found it in my size. It was tagged ( damn ) so had to take it to a manned till rather than self service. I decided that if the female assistant serving me asked, I would simply say it was for myself, she would think I was joking. She only commented how lovely the dress was, I agreed and left with a warm happy feeling.

    The buzz of shopping in person really is worth it.

    I usually drive to nearby towns where nobody knows me.

    Supermarkets with self service tills are great, as long as the items are not tagged.

    If you worry you may bump into somebody in a supermarket with incriminating stuff (bras, heels, foundation etc ) in your basket buy a newspaper to cover it, something I have done in the past😂😂😂

    Relax, relax, relax, just say what you are buying is for you, they will think you are kidding !

    Good luck,

    love

    Bianca

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