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hi girls first of all still finding my way around this great site…I just want to say hello. ..and share a bit about me am 42 ando I’ve been dressing since about 10…at first it was just my sisters clothing I’d have them on for a bit then take them off…this was my life and I was happy I got my own clothes and I’d dress for a bit and I was happy. .fast forward to now and I live with my partner she knows about Kelly and I dress really when I want but my problem is for the last few years when I take my girl clothing off it gets me down I just don’t want to take them off am beginning to feel I could maybe be transgender. ..dressing now and then just not doing it anymore x
Hi Kelly, first of all, its great to have you with us and thankyou for joining CDH. I would say your feelings are not unusual. There are differing types of cross dressing, just like there are differing types of people. Some do it occasionally and are happy with that, others do it all the time. As you have been doing it long term, you have become accustomed to wearing femme clothes, and just for the record, i’m sure if most of us had the choice, we would all dress up more if we could! If your partner is happy for you to wear more often, then do it! just be you. The issues arise when your wife or partner is happy for you to dress, but not all the time as in my relationship. it largely then becomes a compromise. Maybe it would be a good idea to tell your partner first, then take it from there? 🙂
Fiona xxx
Hi Kelly
Thanks for sharing your story.
I believe both are in you, male and female, a spectrum, which in your case is pushing more to the female side.
It can be sooooo addictive, the beautiful clothes in endless variety and colours, lingerie in gorgeous materials against your skin, silk,satin,lace,Lycra, make up to hide or downplay our perceived flaws and accentuate our good points, and don’t even get me started on wigs,shoes,boots,Jewellery,bags(purses), scarves etc etc.What is our drab wardrobe in comparison🤮. In a perfect world where we could wear what we want when we want without fear of ridicule, or being ostracised, the Bianca in me would take over.
I have weighed up the risks, and on balance am keeping Bianca to myself and all the wonderful members of CDH, due to family and work circumstances at the moment. It is something I suggest you do, is coming out more as Kelly, and all the joy that would bring you worth potential grief in other parts of your life ?
I hear our American friends mentioning therapists regularly, not really the done thing here in Scotland, but perhaps talking through things with a therapist specialising in transgender issues would be worth it to clarify your road ahead.
Whatever it is I wish you well, stay strong my friend.
Love
Bianca
Hi Kelly, I know exactly what you mean – I really dislike the time I have to take my makeup and lady clothes off.
I know that I have a very strong feminine side and I’m happier with that each time I dress- but gender isn’t an issue for me at all.
People are more accepting of a man in a dress these days, so no problem in being who you are.
I hope you figure out who you are soon!
Love Laura
Hello Kelly, many of the ladies here struggle with the same question and share their challenges openly to help support others. There are both risks and rewards to becoming more femme and as has been repeated, only you can decide what will work best in your individual circumstances and those around you. Take the necessary time to consider things and do what is best for you.
I think Bobbi’s answer is excellent! The journey is similar yet different for each of us. It’s our job to discover what the destination is and to enjoy the journey along the way. I am still discovering new things about myself every day and embracing Cyn more and more. As Dr. Seuss said “Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is youer than you!”
Cyn
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