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Okay ladies….this sounds a bit silly but….just think for a minute
If I were female everything I love about crossdressing would be ” everyday”, like putting on make up, looking pretty, shaving legs, what to wear etc etc….do women get the same ” rush ” that I do going shopping or just walking in high heels….I think not!!!
I have heard women complaining about this daily ritual all of my life, and I’m sure they don’t find it as exciting as I do….but if I were a girl, would I lose that.????? My mind would be female, so obviously everything would feel different…
if all you girls who crave to be female actually were, do you think you would be as happy being a girl as you are now, wanting to be one. Would you just be another ordinary housewife, which may appeal now, but do women actually like housework???
and if you were a girl, how do you think you would feel if you found out YOUR beloved partner was crossdressing…..remember, your mind is now female!!
I have thought a lot about this, and I think I have reached the peak of what I want….but I’m so interested in all of your different opinions……let’s go girls..
Grace xx
Grace, I’m with you. I think the GGs take for granted all they do as women. For me the thrill and satisfaction of crossdressing is mostly discovery. A side of myself has emerged, and I have embraced, that gives me a sense of inner peace that has eluded me for most of my life. As a woman I feel I am a complete person. As a woman the edginess and restlessness I have as a man goes away.
Too many men define themselves by what they do. Very bad for the self esteem if you don’t measure up to your own standards.
Womanhood has given me a sanctuary, a place of peace and comfort, a sense of feeling complete, a sense of fulfillment.
Was I born to be a woman? I don’t think so. I just found, for me, a better place.
Thank you all for bearing your souls.
Lee Ann
Thank you honey, you have answered so many questions….I think I finally know the real stevie…..hehe xx
It depends on what type of CDer you are, or more to the point are you simply a CDer or are you TG as well. Last year I was just a guy that occasionally dressed in lingerie for self gratification. Earlier this year I morphed into an everyday CDer, then not long ago I noticed a very interesting development that’s got me thinking differently. A couple of months ago I waxed my legs for the first time and started wearing polish on my toes. The significant part for me is that my love of stockings and pantyhose, the original focus of my CD, has been put on the back burner. I think its because I love how feminine my legs look so much that I don’t want to cover them up, which of course is the same reason I wore stockings in the first place. Maybe its not the stockings but instead its feeling and looking like a girl which makes me happy, isn’t that more TG than CD? All this is to say I believe I’d be happy living full time as a girl, hell if I had the dough I’d get a smaller nose, fuller lips, and boobies!
I would say YES. I have discussed this subject with other girls here. My wife says it is a b*tch to be a woman. That putting makeup on every morning before going to work is a real pain. Most women are just living and going thru the motions. I follow some women who are authors and write books about femininity and I believe those women appreciate being women.
If I was a girl and my partner was crossdressing, I would support it fully. I have often wondered, what if my wife wanted to me a man. An interesting thought. I would still be very supportive! It’s what is in their heart that counts!
Such an interesting question. For me, I think yes I would. It depends on why you dress and as Cindy Lou says, what sort of CD you are.
I dress like a female version of my alter ego; casual everyday. I dress most days to a greater or lesser extent but don’t do wigs or makeup unless I’m going for it. That’s not strictly true but for another post.
If I were to take Alice out of the house then I’d have to wear makeup to detract from my obvious bloke appearance. If I didn’t have to, then I wouldn’t. And if I were magically transformed into an actual girl, then my outlook would probably be the same. Provided the transformation included my face, I would probably not be a really girly girl. I think therefore, the drudge of everyday beautification might be as special as it is now and I’d still enjoy it.
However, what else comes with being female? Predatory males, pay inequality and mansplaining to name but three. As a man I live in a privileged position which I would resign upon transformation. Do I still want to be a girl?
Alice x
Excellent question! I have thought of this before and still don’t have a definitive answer. Everything that currently brings me so much joy, would be just “normal” life. I still feel I would appreciate being female and being allowed to do female things, even the day to day grind, without fear of retribution or persecution. The only thing that would be missing is the feeling that I couldn’t be who I really wanted to be because I would already be that person. Wow! Now I’m really confused!
Wow Emily….sorry to confuse you….take a deep breath, grab a martini…..and dunk an olive!!!
Grace xx
You always pose the most interesting questions, Grace, it makes one think.
I think my answer is no, I enjoy both sides of me. The thrill of being Regine, would be lost if I was a GG, I would just be her. and at the same time, I enjoy being him, just in a different way? do I make any sense?
Unlike a lot of my sisters, here, I don’t want to “BE” a woman, it is an escape from my reality, becoming that beautiful creature that resides inside me.
RegineHi Grace
Having spent the morning shopping en femme, in a lovely, long swishy skirt and my favourite boots, I can safely say that, although this is every bit as good as any time before, I would not actually want to be a girl. Maybe for a day or 2 out of curiosity…
As I am only attracted to females, I really, really wouldn’t mind if my partner wanted to cross dress, because it’s about the person inside.
I wouldn’t have a partner if I had to have a man, but really, a woman can dress how she wants – I would never tell my wife to stop wearing jeans just because I like dresses and skirts.
I met a lovely cross dressed girl on one occasion in this amazing city – she was wearing full fig evening wear, tux, bowtie, shoes, the works – and she looked amazing – kinda magical in a way – she had me hypnotised in the way she still looked like a beautiful woman, even fully dressed as a man.
Ah! My food has arrived. I’m so glad that my favourite restaurants are open!
Love Laura
I have said similarly in the past…GGs do nothing but complain about being women. Everywhere one looks in Western society, they are complaining about “the patriarchy” and trying to embrace what THEY perceive to be more masculine roles for themselves.
We embrace the fem look and clothing in a way they rarely do. Would that change if we were GGs? Probably, I suspect.
I have rarely (if ever) wanted to be female. What I do enjoy is taking the fem role in certain areas of life, namely my relationships with men. I adore taking the female role, but otherwise find the gender-bending aspects of being part-time too thrilling to give up. I think as a GG, it would become ordinary and mini-skirts, thigh highs, lingerie, stripper shoes, etc. would lose their thrill.
As for how I would feel if as a GG, my husband suddenly announced he were a CD? I’d probably be unhappy. I tend to think it’s unreasonable to expect wives to be that understanding, since it’s such a very radical departure from the man they thought they married. But if some women like it, to each their own!
That’s an interesting twist, Grace to consider being a girl and having a cd partner. I’m not sure how I’d process that, it’s a real paradox situation to even begin to imagine how I’d how feel… At the moment I’m fiercely independent although I am involved in a super long-distance ‘relationship’ (loose term) with someone in the USA. It’s about as comfortable as I can get with partners. Although, interestingly enough they are very similar to me [us] So… Howwever ‘as’ a girl… I honestly don’t know. I still actually ‘like’ certain male aspects and I’m not sure if I’d ever want to give those up… Women are a source for me (probably all of us) An inspiration for adoration, but hmm… That’s a real head-scratcher. haha
Thanks for reading my weird non-answer, answer!
Great question Grace.
I sometimes find it difficult to explain how I feel but I probably would have transitioned when I was younger at least I would have explored it.
I have the luxury of being feminine everyday.
I dress everyday.
Yes I have put on stockings and while adjusting the straps I see a run in them.
Yes I have been late for an appointment because I am still looking in the closet saying I don’t have anything to wear.
Yes I have come home and my feet are killing me because of the 5 inch heels.
But when I am dressed and look in the mirror it is Jessica looking back.
When I go out I don’t think about being dressed as a girl. It is just normal for me.
Would I be happier as a girl? Probably but I am in a good place now in life and I try not to go back in time and regret stuff.
Great question!!!!
Look forward reading what others have to say.
Jessica
I already am, the days of me presenting as a tomboy are behind me, those 2 sizes to big shirts and jackets to hide my chest and pants one size to big with a belt to hide my hips and silhouette. With or without makeup I am not mistaken for a male. Doctors truly messed my BC and childhood by marking me with Male identifiers, why would they mark a female as male and subject them to the torture of masculine roles. Yuck.
I don’t wake up as a male or undress at night to become a male. Full time female wether I have superficial articles of clothing on or not and damn happy about it. Dont know how my friends will take it seeing how frequently they stay in touch it might be a year or so and by then hopefully the next phase will be completed. Surgeon who butchered my insides, I hope is out of business, he should never ever touch another human.
Carri….I don’t really know what to say…but I will send you the biggest huggs and best wishes…. you’re obviously hurt and a hurt girl at CDH hurts me!!
Keep fighting, for you darling!!!…if you ever need to talk….
grace xx
Good one Grace, I for one would definitely be happier being a woman. I dress now and I pretend to satisfy what burns inside me. I’m not just a crossdresser I am a woman and everyday I wake up and look in the mirror and the first thing that goes through my head is oh, I’m still him, why can’t I just one day wake up as me. As for what if my husband was a crossdresser then we’d have to cross that bridge when we get to it. There would be too much emotion and thoughts to even speculate on that one. I’m a very open person now after living this life I’ve lived and hopefully that would stay with me.
Thank you a very thought provking question, Heather.
Grace,
That’s a more difficult question to answer than it first seems; the best reply I can give is “probably not”. Socially, I’m a girl, and have been since age 7 or 8. But my sexual identity is male; I’m attracted to women, and have been happily married to a GG for over 56 years. Had I been born female, would I have been “normal”, or would my wires still be crossed? Impossible to know the answer.
Hugs,
BettylouBettylou…I did say in my opening line…think about it!?!?
….the decision is MASSIVE…I didn’t want to make it easy…
(Whisper – can I say lady, I love you , merry Christmas darling….and to your bunnies xxxx)
Grace ❤️
Thinking makes my brain ache, Grace; I’d rather just enjoy being a girl. And I love you, too.
Bettylou
Ah the 64pence question, well my darling I am about to cook, so will get back to you on this one later, thinking thinking thinking, opps must dash turkey wrapped in bacon, need to sort the veggies out. 💋great topic too sweetie.
I would say yes. I have to think that the daily routine GGs go through, that we enjoy so much, would probably be just routine for me as well. But the thrill of wearing ultra high heels, the attention well done makeup brings, seems like something many GGs find exciting because they have a choice to be extremely girly or not. I would like to think I would be that way. If I could choose my next life, I would want to be a girl and grow up into a fabulous lipstick lesbian.
Living full-time, although maybe a little androgynous as I want to blend in and not stand out, well girl androgynous, not boy androgynous, I have never been happier, and my wife often comments on how much better I look.
Sharon said…
“I have never been happier, and my wife often comments on how much better I look.”
you may believe this or not….but what you have said makes me smile!!!
comments like this are so important to tell others, everyone needs a lift….
go girl!!!…..grace ❤️❤️
Sharon you have a fantastic wife to give lovely compliments like that.
Best Wishes to you and your wife.
Sarah xx
I think genetic women don’t like dressing each and every day because they feel like they have to do it. They are competing in a man’s world whether they like it or not, and many years ago they convinced many that they could dress like men – wear a suite, dress shoes (not the sexy high heels), walk like a man, have conversations like a man, etc. Through all those year most (not all but the majority) cannot walk in high heels like a woman, i.e. they look like guys walking in heels. Wearing heels daily and all day does take a toll on their feet, which is why they don’t like wearing them, but they also know that it attracts the opposite sex, which is why they tolerate them. Paired with a sexy dress and makeup, etc. they do like the attention given to them by men. And who wouldn’t want to be standing there all sexy and dolled up and the envy of every other woman in the room huh.
Society also judges them by the way they dress and present themselves much more then society judges men. With men it is oh he’s just a man so it doesn’t matter, but with women, it’s the other women who are most critical to them. You saw what she had on? Can you believe she had those shoes with that dress? or she looked like a slut with that dress, or she is to fat for that dress, or to old for that outfit. So for them it is NOT an enjoyable experience one would think as it is a ritual of acceptance by their fellow women.
As for as going shopping, looking for the sales, and spending someone else’s money seems to be their past time lol. And they seem to collect shoes like little boys collect baseball cards.
As for as being a woman full time, some part of me would love to be that woman inside of me 100% of the day, wearing sexy high heels, nice dresses, having fingers and toes all done, spending hours on makeup and hair, may be fun at first but maybe; just maybe, like genetic woman it would become a chore; and like genetic women being judge by society and other woman would become a drag. If being 100% woman would mean NOT having the mindset of a man were you don’t care what someone thinks of you and how you dress or present yourself, I can see it not being as fun as it seems looking in from the outside.
Jennifer
Knowing and feeling as I do right now I’d be more happy and content, but that’s with the perspective of having lived as one half for 47 years (or at least 30 as an adult)
Had I been born biologically a female and had the exact same life (but that would be difficult to reproduce as my experiences would be quite different then wouldn’t they?) than I’d probably be about the same, or not. I Jeez………
Dang these deep mind bending questions LOL
2 quotes I am fond of go something like this
”Happiness is an inside job”
and
“Wherever you go, there you are”
I would love being a girl I have had thoughts about being the opposite sex when I was a teen but never took it anywhere. I look at it like this, girls can dress as pretty as they like going all out spending the day to get ready just for a few hours at a party that night (wish I could do this). They also can put on a pair of jeans some work boots and a t-shirt and go mudding with the guys and crack a few beers. Guys on the other hand well when was the last time you could make the switch from guy mode to spa day and end it wearing a sexy club dress or a beautiful gown and not be judged by anyone from the public? My view might be skewed but I think if I was born a girl I would have been a tomboy by day and a feminine girl by night. I have dated enough to know that they dont always stay in tip top feminine looks mode and im sure anyone else married would agree to that. So ya I would happier if I was a girl.
Well, it would only work for me if…I can start over when I first understood what it was mostly about probably in my mid to late teens. I mean, living as full and complete life as a female as I could, and yes, with the problems, acceptances, rejections, hassles, joys, but still finding someone to share the rest of my female life with.
But here are the caveats, which are even bigger impediments to that first totally impossible wish. That I would know, although I would never have to meet them, that all my now offspring and their offspring are also living good lives, without them knowing about me.
Two diametrically opposed situations, totally incompatible with each other. I would be heartbroken to give up my children, but sometimes the disappointment of not being who I should have been is terribly depressing. It’s almost the classic dilemma of choosing between two undesirable options, and in reality, I made my choice years ago. And I’m living with it as best I can
Hi Grace really good question I think if I had been born female, getting glammed up everyday would definitely have lost its appeal and possibly not happen. However if I were able to spend the rest of my life as a female in a male body, there would be no loss of appeal I would be dolled up everyday.
Love Sarah xx
sarah said…..
“However if I were able to spend the rest of my life as a female in a male body, there would be no loss of appeal I would be dolled up everyday.”
massive talking point Sarah xx
Well I am back, hi and hello again. Dressed en femme I feel that it would be nice just to wake up one day and pop real woman.
But to be honest if I was to be a female then I would have like to have been one from birth. I had a tremendous wife, I’ve got two beautiful daughters and two amazing grandchildren and have had a great life so far. Would I have had that if I was a female, would i still have that if I became one full time?, no one can answer that.
If I was a female would I want to CD as a man, would that be as much fun, would my husband be as supportive as a wife? There are so many answers that meet different requirements of CD/ING. But for me I am in a good and happy place between two rolls in my life,a beautiful family, and some terrific friends, here and the outside world. I see no need to change it.
Thanks Grace, for another excellent topic.
I think I would have to say no, for several reasons.
One, I do sort of like being a guy at times – it has its advantages and if you play it right not too many downsides.
Two, when I dress it’s kind of a fantasy for me. I strive to be a “pretty” lady. I go to quite a bit of work and effort in the attempt, however lame the results! Problem – if I was a real girl I might not be a “pretty” girl, and would I then be unhappy with myself?
Three, actually being a physical woman includes a lot of very peculiar physical issues and risks that I right now do not have to worry about. These are very real and some of it is quite scary. I’ve watched two wives go through certain issues, and it scares me! I can’t imagine (other than what they confided to me) how much it scared them. They really are so much braver than we are.
Four, being a real woman would entail having to put up with the reality of being treated like a woman. Granted – some of that would be wonderful! But some of it would not be. Not something I have to consider right now, in my fantasy.
So all in all, no. I don’t have the guts.
But perhaps another way of asking would be, if I suddenly “became” a real woman, would I be happy? I think I would learn to deal with it, and embrace it. I’m pretty good at adapting, and I love a challenge. And I REALLY love the clothes, and shoes! And once I realized there was no going back, hell, it would be really fun having real Tatas and a slim waist (assuming I could restrain my desire for a good ale!) and (hopefully) a more feminine face!
But many thanks for your thoughtfulness. Fascinating reading all the replies.
Mikey
Well it depends on if you mean that I change now at this stage of my life or that I get to start over from the beginning as a girl.
I am not so sure I would like the first option, 75 would be a rough point to start being full time (or more full time than I do now).
I could just start over from the beginning, even or especially if I could have the same family that I had, I rather think that I would enjoy it. My grandmother, mother and female cousins that I grew up with always seemed to enjoy being dressed and made-up. Which I think is where I got my love of dressing and nice clothing. I don’t aspire to a sexy look just normal female presentation. I look at my daughter who enjoys being a girl and she is so much me as I would want to be. It gives me such pleasure to see.
Yes I know that things are not always fun and joy being a woman. I watch my daughter struggle with issues of growing up female, and with boyfriends having one or not or braking up with one but isn’t that sort of our common lot?
Well that is my story and I am sticking to it!Hugs Leslie
Hey Grace
This really difficult for me to answer. I have struggled with anxiety and depression for most of my life, and obviously there’s no way of knowing if this is caused or exacerbated by my growing gender dysphoria.
It wasn’t sustainable to continue as I was, and I’m hopeful that the hormone therapy will help bring some balance. I also know the shift to f/t girl is going to be extremely challenging.Here’s to a brighter 2021!
S xx
Huggs Seraphina….I knew when I posted this, that there are so many different girls in so many different situations….that was my interest and I wanted others to see the wide range of problems we all face too !!!!….
merry Christmas darling and I hope you have a settled and happy holiday, grace xxxx
This really is a tough question Grace.I have given it a lot of thought.Although I have spent virtually all of my life fantasising about being female I can’t really say in all honesty that I would be hundred per cent happy being a woman.As you say I doubt if I get the same rush from putting my pretty clothes on every day if I was a real woman.I have had a lifelong love of ladies hosiery but I have heard that most women don’t give their tights/ pantyhose a second thought once they put them on.My wife has more or less told me that.There are some aspects of being a woman that I wouldn’t relish at all,especially periods,pre menstrual tension and the pain of childbirth.Another aspect of being a woman thai I do not like is bitchiness(not all women possess this trait may I add),Having said that the female sex doesn’t have the monopoly on being bitchy..I have met many men in my workplace who have been very adept at cattiness and backstabbing.By the same token I still envy women for their beauty,and ability to make friends.
Nowadays,as a retired person of sixty I am able dress as Roberta everyday.My wife is a hundred per cent supportive of my femme side.She buys all my clothes.She is very indulgent and we have a lot of girly chats about clothes.At the end of the day though, we are still husband and wife.If I had been born a girl I would never have met her.She is a very speecial person.Everyday that I am dressed strive to be as gentle,soft,beautifully attired in lovely femme clothes.Weighing it all up need I ask for more?
Great question Grace and thanks for all your entertaining threads.They are cheering us all up in these dark times.
I think a lot of girls enjoy their femininity, especially when they are young and discover they have girl power and can use that to get nearly everything and anything they want from guys.
When I began dressing as pretty and sexy as I could as Patty I was 18. When I went to parties, guys would fawn all over me. I could see form the goofy look on their faces and their awkward conversation that they were smitten. I had been there so many times. But now I was on the other side. I had girl power. I could use it to get things I wanted, which for good or bad I often did.
I have met several CD’s and some TG’s over the years. I understand where some TG’s are not too thrilled with CD’s. I’ve been told by them that CD’s don’t take their femininity seriously. For us it’s fun, a thrill, exciting or what ever else we get out of it. We can undress and turn off our feminine side. TG’s are always in touch with their feminine side. It’s always there. They claim some guys like to date TG’s because they are always thinking femme.
GG’s tend to stop thinking femme less and less. After a time they dress like their husbands or boyfriends and even get haircuts more like them. So maybe that girl think and girl power might fade away for GG’s over time. But then if they are going out and want to look all femme, pretty and sexy, they can turn it back on.
I guess what I learned from this is TG’s are always thinking femme. CD’s come and go. And GG’s fade.
I cross dress every day. What I mean is I cross dress male to go to work. And yes, presenting female is about ten times the effort a genetic girl (GG) expends. But I love being female. It just feels right.
What im getting at is we all need to simply be ourselves. Dress once a month? Decide your trans? It’s all good.Who knows? I admit a part of the magic would be gone. I like dressing as a woman and I think a part of that is cause Jenny has no job, she has no stress. When I am Jenny it is like distancing myself from the real world so if I was Jenny all the time that would no longer be true.
But there are butterflies when I think I could actually indulge in this side of me. I could actually buy dresses and make-up and talk to girls about it without being a freak. My only ‘guy’ hobby is video games and that is way more gender neutral than I think people give it credit for. So I don’t think I would be any different.
The only real question to how I would change and be different would be entirely based on how other people treated me, which I can’t quite speak to as I can’t compare the two lives of male me to female me. I can point out connections like my sisters show that I don’t think I would be treated all that different in the family, my female classmates were mostly alright (some stupid boys exist, but I hated those boys as well), all of my jobs have treated females pretty well. No pay gaps due to a very strict wage breakdown.
So would I be happier? Maybe a little. I would enjoy indulging make-up when I wanted to, but I wouldn’t be one of those that indulged in it every day. Same with clothing. Some days at my work jeans and a t-shirt would do just like several female coworkers wear. Other days I would love to walk in there in a skirt and cute top.
didn’t have to ponder that one too far..a definite no
1. I enjoy too many things that are best done in male mode, playing with old cars and trucks,chores, other hobbies
2. To be a girl 24 hours a day would be like eating chocolate cake for breakfast daily. After awhile, the appetite and desire might be dulled. A few hours a day, nearly every day, seems to be enough to keep the girl in me satisfied. Very seldom do I go out of the house as Kelli, and doubt I ever will much, living in a hometown where everyone knows everybody. If I lived somewhere else, might be different, but I’ve chose to stay here with my kids & old friends nearby.
More than once I’ve had a dream in which I did live someplace else, in a duplex with a door in the interior connecting the 2 units. my male half lived in one, the female half the other, living 2 separate lives with the ability to switch personas at will. Now that might be coolWho am I when I am not trying to be who I think I am?
Meet me in the garden where there is no right or wrong. – Rumi
Robyn, hi, long time no chat how are you?, hope your well and safe.
A resounding YES Grace. My body and mind would be in the same place as my feelings and desires have led me to. All of the things that I have wished for to one degree or another would then be firmly in one place, and together.
It is that very daily ritual that makes me feel the most feminine. From when I wake up and feel the cocooning embrace of a silk or satin negligee or chemise and panties, the scent of my soaps in the bath rising and surrounding me with the steam, shaving what needs to be done, including that ‘manly’ face shaving and caring for my skin, taking my time picking which panty and bra will be worn that day, and if I am off work, the light makeup I apply, and the outer wear I choose to let the world know me.
Yes, yes, yes!!! Give me those wondrous breasts and a total vag, periods and all, though at my age they would be long gone. And, yes, I would still like my men friends very much.
PaulaF
Hi Grace,
I love your questions.
I have often asked myself the same question.
I dont get to be feminine nearly enough and enjoy it so much however when anything has to be done around the house I immediately fall back into the man mode.
I often wonder what it would be like to stay in femme mode 24/7 for a extended period and often wonder if I have what it takes to be feminine all the time.
I must give a shout out to girls as its a lot harder than I imagined.LOL
I sure would like to give it a shot on a longer term basis.
For now I guess I am just more gender fluid for the search of a better term.
Thanks Patty
Yesyesyes
If I could flick a switch and be 100% female I would do it.
OMG getting tingles just thinking about it.
And it’s so much more than just the clothes, make up etc. Inside I feel I am almost there. Feel a lot more ‘estrogen’ and a lot less ‘testosterone’ these days, far more comfortable in the company if women than men. In the company of men I feel I have to act like a man and suppress my femininity, but that’s getting harder to do🤣
I have also just joined a feminist book group. What an intelligent progressive bunch of girls, bringing out the ‘sassy’ in me. This girl is no doormat to be trampled on. Nothing extreme, just questioning the relevance of a historically patriarchal society, the implied superiority of men I so many areas of society, from ‘mansplaining’ and talking down to women, to the extremes of domestic abuse, rape, murder. Still going on all over the world, grossly under reported and dismissed by the predominantly white affluent middle aged media moguls, politicians, captains of industry. So much media attention on black lives matter this year, and that is great. But what about the historical, and ongoing subjugation and oppression of half the population of the planet.
Sorry Ill get off my soapbox🤣🤣🤣🤣just another part of my feminine side coming out, and to think it all started years ago from trying on a bra🤣🤣🤣loving it.
❤️B
I have asked my self this question several times and my answer is it depends.
I would be a translesbian as in a girl but still love women like my wife (and given that she isn’t lesbian I think that would cause some issues).
When I dress it’s mostly for the look and not for the actions. My mind doesn’t change and it’s not like I change personality (guess that’s why my wife accept it) so living/doing X is not changing.The biggest diff would be that to some level it would be easier to wear the clothes I like. “Some level” since what I wear would still stand out among all the jeans and t-shirt women around here.
As for whatever it thrill would die down, probably but just think that I can dress drab or glam I think it would take a long time.
/kt
I too have thought about this quite a bit, and this comes on the heels of being out en femme doing Christmas shopping most of the day. Then what a let down when I have to return to my old male self.
However I have wondered so much about this, if I could dress every day, would it get old and stale after a few months? No idea. It might very well be the other way around, I may want to continue to live as a woman 24/7. I wold like to have the chance to try!
I was so buzzed this morning as I had breakfast, and said goodbye to the rest of the household, then rushed to get into my outfit for the day. Then the let down when I get home is real, and very much a downer. My wife hates wearing pantyhose, and I love it. However, they are a pain to get on and to do this every day, would I still love doing it?
This is one of the things only experience can say, I think. If one still relishes in all of the things it takes to be a woman, then that is your path. I have never felt I was trapped in the wrong body, but now I feel so comfortable, and “at home” when I become Amy for a day, it is almost scary!
Amy
Thanks Amy….another lovely reply, amongst so many others….keep them coming, it’s so interesting…
A great question, thank you!
I guess I probably sit a bit more towards the TS-side rather than pure CD’er and so my feelings are likely coloured by that. But, definitely, if I could be a girl (or a woman at my age!) and have everything that comes with that, I most certainly would, without any hesitation – being male makes me unhappy.
Would being a girl all the time get dull? I don’t think so. Certainly I don’t see why it should be any more dull than my life as a man? In my younger days I lived as Rachel for extended periods, weeks at a time over several years. Unquestionably, the initial novelty of doing my make-up and getting myself ready to go out diminished but it didn’t become boring, just part of who I was and what I did; I liked who I became and did it even when I had nowhere to go.
Similarly, selecting an appropriate outfit for what I was doing was more way complex as Rachel than my life as a man. But equally, it afforded a great chance for expression and exploration and, of course, there’s no denying that the whole dressing side of things would have been far simpler if I had the body and assets of a woman, rather than having to carefully graft, squeeze and pad those features onto my male frame.
And, when I was out and about as Rachel, I definitely found the world to be a very slightly nicer place. Things that I’ve heard referred to as ‘sexist’ or ‘antiquated gestures’, like holding the door open for a woman were, to my mind, really nice when someone did it for me. And generally, I just felt like folks smiled at me much more as Rachel than me in ‘male mode’; possibly because I was smiling more too?
I suppose that one could argue the world is a slightly riskier place for a woman. As comfortable and happy as I was out and about as Rachel, there was always that tiny bit of fear of what an anonymous ‘someone’ might do and while part of that was due to me ultimately being ‘a man in a skirt and heels in a supermarket’, part of it was just that women are more vulnerable – I don’t, however, think that any of my female friends feel the additional risks are oppressive or that they significantly diminish their quality of life – although, that last point is very geographically biased, there are places on this planet where life as a woman carries considerably greater risks than being a man.
Perhaps it’s because I work as a scientist, alongside a number of highly educated and talented women, that I don’t see that being female would have restricted me in any way in terms of career. Although, I have to concede that isn’t the case for all career paths and there are clearly career paths that favour men much more than women. Additionally, I suppose I should consider whether I would still have followed the same path if I had been born female? Or would my upbringing have been sufficiently different that I’d have gone down a different route? That, I think, is unknowable.
In terms of being a ‘housewife’? Sure, my role in a family as woman would be different to what I have now but, as a husband and father, I have just as many responsibilities as my wife and many of those don’t excite me greatly either. Also, I suspect that being a wife/mother would change my perspective on much of these things. My wife often says that taking care of her family gives her pleasure and, deep down, I get that and can see how it would compensate for the perceived drudgery of many of the tasks.
And finally, would I support a crossdressing spouse? That is a hard one… Knowing how I feel right now, wondering if/when/how to tell my wife, I’d like to think that I’d be fully supportive of my husband’s choices. But, I’m not a ‘perfect man’, so I have no expectations that I’d be a ‘perfect woman’ either.
Rachel xx
Of the top of my head, the answer is a definite no. This is because I view my dressing more as a behavior, an opportunity to emulate the feminine (“femulate”). However, I can appreciate that those who dress as an expression of their female identity would answer yes.
As a femulator, turning myself into a woman takes a hell of a lot of work. Makeup, layers and layers of shape wear, squeezing into dresses, the constant anxiety of not meeting unrealistic beauty standards, worry about my weight, etc. I realize that most real women do not have to go to such great lengths, but many do go through them to varying degrees. Too much work to have to do on a daily basis.
Now, all of that said, would I be happier as a stunningly beautiful, outrageously wealthy, globe trotting super model? I’d need to think carefully about my answer to that one. But an “average” woman? Again, definitely not. Not that there’s anything wrong with being a woman of any kind. But I’ve always been reasonably happy and satisfied as male self. We really have no idea what it would be like to be a real woman. There’s joys and sorrows in everyone’s life. Having a monthly period? Fighting against a male dominated society? Sexual abuse? Sorry, not interested. I can’t help but think, “Be careful what you wish for” and “The grass is always greener”.
I think happier as a girl…………family life would have been a lot more normal………….mom’s mental state would not be as severe………..she would at least have ………..”her girl”………….to be the go-between for mom and dad…………..help keep the other three boys in line and do what mom need to have done………………the relatives would not have stayed away because of the disfunction………
i also think I would have become a lesbian………..and be another girl’s little girl…………………….karley
I am happy just being someone who in touch with both sides of my personality. As A guy I been places and done things most of us never experienced, yet I can enjoy all the wonderful clothing and fem things the ladies do. It’s the best of both worlds and I love it.
Grace;
Simple question, but a hugely complex answer. After stewing on it for a long time, I realized that I really have no idea if I would be ‘happier as a girl’.
I’d love to know now what the answer is, as it would make it so much easier on determining what the future will hold. I’ve met and talked with a number of CDs who have said that the need to transition didn’t show up until later and that they could have saved themselves so much time and heartache to simply have started transitioning earlier “if only they knew” . All of them now express how much happier they are, and quite frankly as a trend this is very disturbing as it makes me wonder if I know my own mind or not.
Thanks for the question and the answers that this has elicited from everyone else.
-Molly
For me, I think I would have been happier to be born a GG, all my life I was treated as the weakest member of my family, everyone (in my family) thinks I am overly sensitive, and they hide things from me that they think I would get upset over. I am not sure if being born a GG would have solved this, but I think things would be different in the way I was treated.
While I would be happy that no one would be judging me, everything would be routine. I’m happy as I am now, even though I doubt I’ll ever get to go out as Annaleigh.
I’d be happy that I wouldn’t have to hide my love of women’s clothing, including a new found love of panty hose, but I’m not sure I would be happy regarding everything else.
I really love the duality of my being as does my wife. Being in such a wonderful relationship I have to give as much consideration to her as she gives me. Stephanie was no where on the horizon when we met or even when she came to live with me. It has been an amazing exploration and adventure for both of us. I have found that like my wife, most gg’s don’t go to much trouble with their appearance while out in public. Since I started dressing, we have updated her wardrobe and while out, she no longer wears the slouchy clothes. She has reclaimed her girly ways as I discover mine. While cleaning, cooking or other inside chores I am in Stephanie mode. While working on vehicles, yard or the house I am in my man clothes. I guess the main reason is, I don’t have any girly “work” clothes and I don’t want to mess up my nice things. I still get great satisfaction from fulfilling my manly duties and being there in that capacity for her. By the same token she really loves Stephanie and encourages me to be happy regardless of who I am at the moment. I don’t think I would change a thing other than being able to go out in public more as Stephanie and that limitation is self imposed due to family.
No I dont think I would be happier as a girl. I think I would lose my mind. Now I would like to be able to dress more often but being a woman everyday NO
Grace
I really don’t like being a man… I never have despite being aware of white male privilege.
I have an opportunity to be myself now and I’ve discovered that women can do the stuff I’ve always done… but better dressed!I would be a woman at the drop of a hat and I think I may very well take that option one day.
Men always have such boring clothes!
xxx Polly
Hi Grace,
Yes, I would love to live full time as Katey. I now try to be Katey as much as possible and dread when I have to me the male me. Routine you say, well if most things in life I’ve always been able to “adapt and overcome” (most things) I think the routine of being Katey would have to be modified to fit my daily life. Just like anything else we do in life once we are taught certain things we always find a shorter easier way and adapt them to our life. I would not be a housewife, Katey would be active and getting out there and enjoying life then come home and relax. Now I don’t think being a housewife is a bad thing I just don’t think its for me. I think it would be a struggle at first but you know what, so are other things, but we learn and grow into your new surroundings.
If I found my SO was a CD? hmmm…I never had a SO I will only be guessing here. I think I would want them to come forward with that. They are probably terrified of me finding out, I think it would be a great benefit to the relationship, in a way where they don’t need to hide or lie. I really don’t know on this subject, sorry.
Life is not easy. I can ramble a lot more but I don’t won’t to bore you. Great Post!
Hugs-KateyTo be a “real” women for me would be heaven. If I were married to a man and he wished to crossdress I would be fully supportive. There are way to many girls on here and elsewhere that don’t get the support to be the person that they wish to be and have to suffer wondering if there is something wrong with them. This would be the same if I had a son with the same feelings. Until the rest of the world comes to grips that we don’t live in a cookie cutter world, those who don’t fit the mold need all the support and encouragement to be the person they are meant to be.
I must have missed this gem on its first run through. Thank you Grace
It took a long time for me to understand that I fall somewhere mid scale on the gender spectrum. I was and am very happy to have realized that something in was amiss and accept the femme in me, helpibg to make me feel more complete and content.
To live full time as a female, would, I believe, put me right back in the same boat as previous…but backwards. It would just be my maleness now calling out for recognition and needed attention. It takes two to tango, and to make me who I am, Happier.
Lady Olivia
Brit honey….I’m in to women only..
Thanks for your be reply…I do all my housework however I’m dressed….it has to be done…..
Keep slaying vampires darling xx
Great thinking Stephanie, well said sweetie
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