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I am always curious about how others choose their femme name. We don’t get a choice about our “given name”, but we do with our femme name. I originally chose Ashleigh because I have always loved that name, especially spelled that way. A couple of years ago, as I have matured in more ways than one, I decided the Emily suits me better. Isn’t it fun to be able to choose the name that you feel fits who you really are, as opposed to having to use the name you were given? Anyway, curious as to how others arrive at their chosen name.
For me I defiantly didn’t want to go with the fem version of my male name I thought of picking something that started with a “J” ’cause my mother, and two sisters name started with that letter.
I wanted something soft and feminine sounding, but also nothing like Roxane or Candy, sounds too much like a strippers name. I was hoping to find something more rare and original but but finally picked Michelle.
Heather is the name I was going to be if I was born a girl and Jameson is my way of being a Bond girl, I love James Bond.
Though Michelle is the feminine version of the name given to me. I still feel like it fits who I am. Funny thing is I one time asked my mom what name would she have given to me if I was born with all the other parts and she said Michelle. So I guess it was to be. Though I would most definitely choose a different middle name. 🙂
Michelle
I can’t say that I’m particularly attached to my femme name. The only reason I picked one is because sites like this more or less force you to pick one. With that said, I used the Social Security Administration’s ssa.gov website to pick a name. They have tables of the most popular male and female baby names by birth year. For my birth year, I looked up the rank of my real name and then found the corresponding female name. I didn’t like the result of that, so I went by the closest match to the percentage of total births instead of simple rank ordering. That gave me Rebecca. Most people know me by the diminutive form of my male name, thus Becky.
I picked Helen because I just like the name.
I use to hate my name as it was used for both genders and seamed feminine to me.
I used to get called patricia a lot
Now I have found I love it as my feminine nameI thought a lot of people use a variation on their real name.
makes the most sense to me unless you just hate your name
Patty
As stated elsewhere on CDH, “Caty” came from a lady named Catherine who some 40 years ago came to our house to drop off her (small) kids before she and her hubby went off to a formal ball.
Her hair and make up were impeccable and she was wearing a gorgeous apricot chiffon full length gown.
I’ve never forgotten how she looked that night and I guess that’s eventually why I ended up with the gown you see in my profile picture.
Happy dressing
Caty
At college parties, girls began kidding around with me because I always wore nice, shiny pantyhose. They began calling me Panty Hose. They even gave me name badges with Panty Hose on it. Then one time the “n” was written kind of small and it looked like Paty Hose. Then, since I was dressed all fem I became Patty Hose. I changed the last name to Phose as kind of an abbreviation for pantyhose.
Since I beacame a crossdresser over my love of wearing pantyhose and showing my legs, being named after my favorite garment was quite suitable I thought.
Hi Emily, My Mom always used to tell me that I should have been a girl. I bonded with my Mom when I was very young (not so much with my father). Before my Mom passed away four years ago, I asked her “if I was born a girl, what name would I have?” She answered me without evening blinking. Krista. I loved it immediately. I wish she was still around and I know I could tell her that I am a CD and she would be supportive. Hugs, Krista
My mum told me when I was a kid that if I’d been a girl I would have been called Helen Elizabeth. That’s why I like the name Helen.
My mum gave me the name Susan but not in a nice way. If I was having a tantrum (I think) she would goad me by saying “look at Susan,” or “what’s wrong Susan” etc so once I was dressing I thought of myself as Susan and that was that. I don’t think she liked the name Susan so claiming it for a positive reason majes me feel that I am in control of this and not her (we didn’t get on much),. I also have the name Marina which was given to me by an ex GF who I asked to give me a new name. As I love cleaning the house dressed she called me Marina the Cleaner which I thought was funny. My surname is like that of Malcom X who gave himself the X to say he reclaimed his history… I choose Zed to show that Susan started with me 🙂
Hmmmm
well if I go full tilt makeup and wild hair, I have sort of an…… Evil sexy look.
so, Eve
and, well the clean version is…,….
Aahhhhhh is screamed or moaned quite a bit.
so, Aahh
1 + 1 =
EeVAahh
I always loved the name Misty! And I just wanted to shine, so I added lights, Misty Lights! Plus it is a complete opposite of my male name Bill. Always wanted to let my outgoing inner woman out! Have a great day!
– Misty Lights!😘😘
As my femme side started become more insistent, I started thinking that she should have her own name, and the name “Amy” just came into my head. I went through some other female names I like, Linda, Catherine, Patty, and a few others, but kept coming back to Amy. For some reason, it just seems to fit. Then I very quickly noticing when the name came up in other situations, like on TV, or in print, and I have the same kind of recognition that I do when I see or hear my male name. So, for some reason, Amy is ME!
XO
Amy
Cute! I really only considered two names; First was Davina later Davida. I’ve not met a Davida before SOoooo here I am!
I picked the name Cindy short for Cynthia. It the name of my decease wife that passed of breast cancer after over three battle! We were married for 40 years in 2014 this year it should be 45 years! She knew that I crossdresser,
I guess this is my way keeping her alive and inside my heart! I’m crying now have to go! Love you Ladies 😘
When I began to explore my femme side, I decided I wanted a name just for her. It seems silly now, but I made a long list of given names. I dressed and said each name while looking at my girl in the mirror. When I said Miranda, I had the most exquisite smile and I knew I was Miranda. For the surname I chose the name of character from a French TV show. Lebel ( the beautiful) which is how feel when feminine
Beautiful name an adorable explanation. How wonderful to hear this. I’m constantly intrigued to hear the “Days of Discovery” in the lives of others. On the shores of the ocean they have a term, ‘the under tow’ it’s a strong unseen current that pulls away from the common shore
I had no idea others went through this. I was absolutely naïve about Crossdressing. I had a vague idea about the gender wars, King & Queens for show, LGBT for rights and identity. But MTF/FTM Crossdressing… really I had no idea it was an established thing. One day, after gotten several pairs of shoes, skirts and blouse s. I thought if I had been born female I be the same person or it was like I had discovered my silent twin. David being the typical accepted persona and Davida the silent shadow. Had I come into the world as Davida, David would still be but as the silent shadow persona. Davida is the Scottish female equivalent to David
Hi there Emily! My name……..
Graunwolf ( Family name back in the Hapsburg Dynasty era – pre WW1 germany/Austria)
Veronica Female version Roland ( Knight Leader – Franks Empire (France) Charelmagne the Great)
Dame Ordained Knight Templar (Scotland) Cathederal/Temple of Rosslyn/Temple of Solomon, Jerusalem (Was entitled Lady at Court – Hapsburg Dynasty)
I hope this helps in your Quest
I’ve told this story elsewhere so apologies if this is old hat.
“Val’sheril Starsong” doubtless sounds fanciful and pretentious, as well it should; it was originally the femme name of a beloved genderfluid elf bard on World of Warcraft. Since the moment of introspection that helped me to finally embrace her coincided to my admitting my actual love for the player of Val’s RP boy-wife, it just seemed like a no-brainer, and it’s come to define my femme sense of style; Val is a glamor girl and ever-so-slightly brazen, though never beyond the bounds of being a lady. She is her own person and beholden to no one else’s conventions; I should know, she reminds me of that frequently! 😉
Hi Emily, well when I was 16 i worked in a grocery store. My hair was shoulder length and I was very tall slender and effeminate. My mannerisms were very girlie. Well one day at break one I was sitting next to a coworker who was tall and slender like me. She too had shoulderr length hair and the same color as mine. We were both sitting, smoking and chatting. Her name was Julie. A coworker came in and told us we loooked like twins from behind. The next time i did my makeup i looked in the mirror and saaid oh hi Julie. And it has been ever since.
I liked the name Samantha so I picked it. For the last name, it’s a reference to an old Murphy’s Law calendar that was hanging on the wall for far too long. I was just too lazy to take it down. I often find myself overthinking names which took the fun out of finding a name. I didn’t want to do that here and decided to take the first name I thought of and enjoyed it.
My ex girlfriend and I was laying in bed together in our sexy nighties and I asked her what she thought would be a good name and she said Abi. So Abi was actually given to me by my ex. Then I thought Cross would be good because of crossdresser obviously. So Abi Cross was born 💖
That’s a partnership Lana good job your weren’t going past Crinkley Bottom. The Brita might understand this one.
I didn’t actually choose my femme name. Growing up, my nickname was Pat, taken from my last name. Long story there. So when my feminine nature peeked out the bullies pounce and proclaimed me Patricia. Mind you I wasn’t physically bullied, only verbally. I didn’t like it a the time, but not being one to get in fights, I just did my best to ignore it.
When I finally needed a femme name, (when I join Tri-Ess) I went with what the bullies dubbed me, used my middle name (spelling altered) as a last name and threw in the name of a favorite aunt as my middle name.
That’s kind of funny, I have always really liked this name as well!
My male name has no direct female equivalent, so I figure Ashley works as a rough equivalent since, like my male name, it is common and popular. That’s also why I chose the modern spelling, even though I also really like the old spelling.
First name – I chose Rachel because of Rachael Ray. Found the name to be so cute and adorable, but I wanted to change the spelling to separate us.
Last name – That’s my male middle name, just without the “s” at the end.
I also chose a middle name, as well. Karana. An ode to the main character of the book “Island Of The Blue Dolphins” by Scott O’Dell. I’ve always loved that name and we girls need something a little exotic in our lives, hehehe.
I really don’t remember when I felt like I was Jasmine but I remember the first time I put on a pair of pantyhose at 5 years old when I sat down and crossed my legs I said too myself Jasmine your beautiful legs you are like Mom i felt like a girl
After having been dressing more and more I realized that I would need a femme name. I thought of all the different ones and ended up choosing Jennifer. It sounded how I felt, softly feminine and nice. It became permanent one night at a gay club drag show my friend hosted in drag. She came to me and wanted to introduce me to the crowd and wanted to know what was my femme name. Given I was a bit stunned, I came out with Jennifer and it has been my public name ever since.
So I chose my fem name after several events in my life. First of all it’s Lori Anne Stevens. Lori is from the first girl I fell in love with(at the tender age of 10 in elementary school). How I wished I could have been her all those years ago! Anne is my mother’s middle name and Stevens is from Tabitha in bewitched. I know I’m not the only one here that wished to wiggle their nose and change into a beautiful woman!!!
Nice poll question, Emily.
I had to choose “Other” because none of the other options worked for my femme name choice. I chose “Berta” as a way to honor my Mother’s dream and wish that her 2nd and last child (me) would be the daughter she’d always wanted. Her first, my brother, was 6 years older than me and she was around 39 -40 when I came along. She only wanted satin girl baby items during her pregnancy and, I’m told, tried everything she could to have me be a girl. (I was dressed in all those satin outfits until I started school! Which may explain my satin passion and need still today at age 79+!) Her baby was to be named Roberta! When I arrived with a tiny “pointer” she simply dropped the “a” in choosing my male name. So in my early 40’s when my feminine needs awoke and, as others have shared, it became necessary to have a female name here in cyber land I chose “Berta”. I did this because it didn’t seem to be very popular and there were plenty of Roberta’s. In the hope of developing lasting cyber friendships sharing our lifestyle I have only used Berta on-line or a slight deviation of that because of Yahoo where I am Berta_Gal.For some reason the posting clock is a few hours off. I’m posting this edit at 4:48 PM EDT (USA East Coast)
My oldest sister dressed me and called me Cynthia when I was 4-5 -though I have no conscious memory of it. I DID hear about it as I got older and when I started dressing t age 11, I just kept the Cynthia! (when I told her about me three years ago, she got REALLY worried that she had CAUSED it; i had to reassure her it was nothing she did-just who I am.
CynMy name was a journey much like any aspect of my experience.
I selected my given name as it was the first name to come to mind when tasked with needing one. As time passed, I came to the realization that it was a good fit. I never considered the feminine form of my legal given name as it would be pronounced the same.
My middle name is the feminine form of my legal middle name. I had originally selected as it as my surname in its Francophone form. However, after consideration, I felt it was not a proper fit as my surname. It has always been my middle name, and something of which I am proud. As such, I instead choose to use the feminine form as my middle name.
My surname is my paternal grandmother’s maiden name. I have always like the and having not known my paternal grandparents, I feel it provides a connection to that branch of my family tree.
MacKenzie Alexandra
My name has no relationship to my real name, my family or my past. Elizabeth is a traditional name, but I’ve noticed there’s a difference between girls who go by “Liz” and girls who go by “Beth”. Liz is beautiful, confident, and lets you know when she enters the room. Beth is the nice girl next door who is quiet and a little bit shy. Today I’m a Beth, but maybe someday I can be a Liz.
No idea where my last name came from – it just seemed to go with Elizabeth or Beth.
Although I’ve been dressing for over 40 years it was only shortly before I joined CDH a year ago that I chose Stephanie, I wanted a name that was special and unique to me so I didn’t want it to be anyone I knew, it took me a couple of hours mulling over a few names dressed in front of a mirror when I said Stephanie it was like switching on a light! My last name is taken from a British Sports Car manufacturer.
PS. I don’t like the shortened form of Stephanie because there is a masculine version, it’s always Stephanie (and I adore it)
love Stephanie x
My given name is Roy i changed the y to a Z and then made it longer to Rozalyne because I liked the sound of it xxxxx
Dorothy Elizabeth matches my given name initials.
Elizabeth was my grandfather’s half sister’s (from his father’s first marriage) middle name. She was born in 1863, and was a “closeted” (as one had to be in those days) lesbian. It seems only apropos that I should honor her memory, even though she died about fifteen years before I was born.
Having chosen Elizabeth, it occurred to me that if I chose a first name beginning with D, I could use accessories, such as cufflinks, and a monogramed tie chain that was my fathers and that I converted to an anklet. So I just sat down and tried out first names, coupled with Elizabeth, until I found one that felt right, and that rolled off the tongue easily.
I began dressing fully fem at 18 and my first outing was a Halloween Party at college. I was wearing very nice, shiny pantyhose, sexy stilettos and a very short dress. I got lots of compliments on my legs. Several girls liked my pantyhose and asked me what they were. At that party I also met other transvestites (as we were called back then). We got along well. They told me they like to dress up and have parties. I might want to attend them. I would have fun.
Every time I went to one of those parties I always wore nice pantyhose to show my legs of at their best. Some of the girls began calling me pantyhose. At one party they were giving out name tags. Mine was Panty Hose. The girls giggled about that and went out of their way to keep calling me Panty Hose. That seemed to stick. At every party it was hi Panty Hose and they would give me a name tag. One time the n was small and my name looked like Paty Hose. I liked that. Next time I asked to be Patty Hose. Then I thought I would adds a bit to it being called Patty Phose, with the ph being an abbreviation for pantyhose of course. It was silly and stupid of course and I thought often of going back to Debbie Daniels, the first name I came up with for my self, but Patty Phose seems to have served me well over a long time, and does describe pretty much what I’m about as a crossdresser.
Patty, I think you are such a brave soul. I would never have had the courage to do that in my college years. Anne
I chose my first name as a pun. My given name can be nicknamed as Al. I chose Alison because it sounds like “Al is son,” a reminder that I am not really a girl. There are several spellings of Alison. Most common is Allison. The form I would have liked, Alisson, is very rare, and if used at all, is more likely a surname than a first name. So I went with Alison.
My surname was chosen partly because the first letter matches my given surname, and because it was the street I grew up on.
Jessica & Lynn were my 2 best mates when i was a young lad/lass.
They were the first to ever see me as i really am They taught me makeup etc….
I adopted their names in honour of them, and kept them after they passed.
Cookie comes from a scottish fireman, I to was a fireman that was the cook (Chef by trade) at the firehouse, hed yell Hey Cook, and with his heavy brogue it sounded like cookie, so I’ve been refered to as Cookie ever since.
Even moving back home 3 years ago, the name came with me
Cookie.
It was my best friends name in high school. She does’t know.
Thanks
Sharon
Identifying my feminine self came later in life for me. As I began to seek help understanding this, I came across CDH and noticed I needed to provide a name as part of registration.
I may have read about the process somewhere. I made a list of about 20 names which I liked. I looked at myself in a mirror as I said each several times out loud. Miranda was the one that made the brightest smiles and felt just right.
I chose lebel from a character in a French mystery show about a vineyard expert who solves crimes, it can also be roughly translated to “the beauty”.
I’ve answered this on other forum posts and will here as well. My fem name is Brittney Diana Andrews(non-legal). I have a fondness for Great Britain and the United Kingdom. I chose Brittney as my first name in honor of Britain. The letters of my real first name are in “Brittney”. The middle name Diana from Diana, Princess of Wales. My real last name is of Scots origin, so I chose Andrews for the the city of St. Andrews.
I voted ‘always liked the name’, but it would be more correct without the ‘always’. I’ve been fascinated by Chloe Sevigny, the actress, as well as one of the original Celtic Women. I started writing stories on another (tg) site and began using that name, so I’ve just stayed with it on other sites I’ve been to. I will say that in my stories, I use different names all the time, and with each story I write, I get rather infatuated with each heroine, and her name, that I write about. I finish the story and it goes away and I always come back to Chloë …with the umlaut, of course.
Wish I had a pound for every time I’ve seen this question.
My femme name is partially what I would have been called had I popped out with a baby girls body (Lesley Anne). I extended the Anne bit to Anne-Marie because I used to secretly admire a class mate in secondary school who had that name and Marshall is a family name (Paternal grannys mum) and whilst we never met, I feel really close to her.
Thus I am Lesley Anne-Marie Marshal (LAMM) but refer to myself as Anne-Marie or occasionally Annie.
Take care girls.
Anne-Marie.
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