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Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic "QUIZ: Do you like bras?" – 4 weeks ago
I scored 45. I love bras more than any other piece of feminine clothing and wear one every day, everywhere I go.
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic "Bras for Men?" – 3 months ago
@veroslondon Veronica, you raise a really interesting point regarding crossdressers vs. transgender. I had a nephew, who is now a niece, come out as transgender about a year ago. When she first came out, I was excited to offer my… Read more»
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic "Why You should wear a Bra" – 4 months ago
Excellent article. I’ve been wearing a bra daily for at least the last 30+ years. I wear it everywhere — around home, to work, out to dinner, etc. — even to doctor appointments starting about a year ago (I’m okay… Read more»
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic "My Bravest Act" – 4 months ago
I love your story, Feliz! I could certainly relate to what you wrote. But at that age I was way too shy to even think of touching another girl’s legs. And I was so excited about panties, I didn’t really… Read more»
Trace Whitaquer posted a new topic "Bras for Men?" – 4 months ago
Nope! If they’re not women’s bras; I don’t want them. The same goes for panties, leggings, skirts, dresses, or any feminine clothing. Yes, there are bras made for men. And yes, men’s bras might be a better fit for a… Read more»
Trace Whitaquer wrote a new post 4 months ago
Bras for Men? Nope! If they’re not women’s bras; I don’t want them. The same goes for panties, leggings, skirts, dresses, or any feminine cloth
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic "Sometimes Awkward or Embarrassing" – 4 months ago
I’m very lucky in that my SO is supportive of my dressing. She knew I was a crossdresser before we ever met (9 years ago), and she understood/understands it is highly unlikely that will ever change. I’ve purchased most of… Read more»
Harriette replied to the topic "Disappointment at My Doctor Appointment Today" – 4 months ago
@fundle Congratulations on the good news.
I don’t underdress going to Dr appointments. However, I have started undressing when leaving those appointments. Some may call that progress.Ellie Davis replied to the topic "Disappointment at My Doctor Appointment Today" – 4 months ago
@fundle Looks as though you’re going to have to find other opportunities to expose your bra to the public 🙂 It’s Saturday; take a blank notepad and a pen and spend a little time writing them all down. It’s… Read more»
Lisa Roberts replied to the topic "Disappointment at My Doctor Appointment Today" – 4 months ago
@fundle Same here! I have a Cardiologist appointment on the 5th. I always underdress. I suppose that more of “us” are not afraid of being judged. Medical staff are the most likely not to judge. Lace and Smiles,
LisaTrace Whitaquer posted a new topic "Disappointment at My Doctor Appointment Today" – 4 months ago
I had a follow-up appointment with my cardiologist today after a procedure I had done 3 months ago. Nearly always my appointments begin with an EKG, and because I always wear a bra under my male clothes, the medical assistant… Read more»
Trace Whitaquer and Paula Terry are now friends 7 months ago
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
Cost is a factor for me, too. I’m retired and can’t spend anywhere near what I used to spend on clothing. I keep an eye out for sales from vendors I like and often find things very inexpensively on Amazon or on clearance racks at major retailers. I look occasionally at thrift stores but haven’t had a lot of success there. I have learned that it’s…[Read more]
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic When to tell a woman you're dating that you're a Crossdresser? in the forum Crossdresser Heaven Polls 8 months ago
I had two long-term relationships with women who had no issue with my crossdressing, so I knew there were women out there who were open-minded enough to not be threatened by my dressing. Both have since passed away. I met my current SO online (not a dating site) in what began as a platonic relationship but quickly progressed to a romantic one.…[Read more]
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
You are fortunate; everything I’ve read, though, seems to indicate that once you’ve had hormone-related breasts for awhile, they don’t ever go away even when the hormone is discontinued. I’ve lost some weight over the last couple of years and my boobs are a bit smaller, but not enough to stop wearing a bra. I’m thankful for that.
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
LOL Well, that’s no more dangerous than wishing we were young, thin, and wishing we could pass easily (for those of us who are none of those).
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
The first time I ever wore forms was many years ago to a New Year’s Eve party with good friends. My breasts were clearly (to me) more prominent under my sweater than they would have been normally, but guess what … no one noticed. So you might want to give it a try sometime; buy a set of small foam breast forms that are inexpensive and see what h…[Read more]
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
I understand. I wear a 46B bra and my breasts are large enough to definitely push my shirts out in male mode (women’s dresses and tops obviously emphasize them much more). But I’m a big guy and lots of big guys “suffer” from gynecomastia (“suffer” in quotes because not all of us see that as a bad thing, including me!), and over the years I’ve…[Read more]
Trace Whitaquer replied to the topic Do you wish your breasts were larger? in the forum General Chat "Life as it Goes On" 8 months ago
For many of us, I think breasts are a lot like money. How much do you want/need? Just a little more. LOL
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I wear a woman’s sport bra and find it very comfortable and affirming. My natural breasts fill it nicely and I enjoy the satisfying hug it provides. I don’t think I would find such comfort in a bra designed for men. You’re exactly right, if it’s designed for a woman, it’s designed for me.
You mention the “hug” that “it” provides, and I couldn’t agree more. There is something alluring and sensual about wearing clothing meant for women that is beyond description; however, one of the facets that deliciously tempts me is the constant appeal of feeling hugged by all of the silky apparel and how it reinforces the fact that there is a side of me that enjoys being female.
Trace, you got my vote on that one. I under dress every day, have been since the early 90’s. Part of the whole sensation is going with confidence into the woman’s section and shopping for yourself, being asked if you need any help, and then taking it. It’s what helps me be the woman I am.
Interesting article there. Made for men womens clothes are all based on womens clothes adapted to suit men. I am a bit confused about bras for men as surely they are exactly the same but marketed differently and cost more. The variety and range of bras in stores means that there is one there for you. I agree panties are difficult as they aren’t designed for men but again in the ranges there are those that will fit and ‘accommodate’ but need to be found.
Womens clothes for men is a niche market and if you look at fancy dress outlets they do have outfits to fit men but designed more for fancy dress or cos play and not crossdressers per se. Fashion houses have designed feminine clothes which are designed for men but you do not see them worn out and about, unless I move in the wrong circles. Nothing feminine made for men is of any interest to me as the rails are filled with things I can, and do wear.
So true. I’ve tried various “men’s wear” for how my body has evolved but at 42-31-40 there’s not a whole lot on the market that makes me feel luscious like a good pair of girlie panties!
Hear, hear!
Totalmente de acuerdo. Me encanta la lencería femenina, está ropa femenina adaptada a los hombres no me hace sentirme bien. Me la compré por justificar que llevaba ropa de hombre, pero no me gusta nada.
I’m with you…I want my body to be naturally female and to wear women’s clothes. Any substitutes are a compromise for me that I just don’t want to make. My natural breasts are relatively small but they’re mine!
Wonderful topic, it really got me thinking.
Things designed for men would give me an excuse with my wife, though she’d probably still say I’m not a young guy or I look odd in them.
I do love women’s things because of that feeling, comfort, and and the difference about me that they let me embrace, celebrate, and sometimes cry about. I like your bra sizes example – I love push-up bras and I doubt they would ever make one for men.
If there was an option that everything was sold as genderless, I might like that better. I want to float in society and be myself, with less judgement, no ridicule, no risk, and no fear. I want my friends and family to just not care that I like certain fashions, styles, and things, and that at my core, I’m still me.
The one benefit if more things were made for men is that I could still wear women’s things, and it would be less of an issue if noticed. That’s the way I think anyway when I go out dressed.
Just this week I went out dressed. Confidently, I walked out of the house with a little voice saying….”So what if I’m wearing a cute sweater, leggings, sandals with painted nails, feminine jewelry, and a purse.”
Maybe I need a blouse or yoga pants that has SO WHAT written on it (lol).
This post raises a lot of interesting questions about what it is to be a cross-dresser. I guess that those who are more transgender inclined don’t see a dilemma. Their issue is with their body and clothes don’t necessarily assume the same significance as they do for cross-dressers. Personally, as Veronica I always wear only l women’s clothes although I’m quite happy to wear androgynous styles such as jeans and jumpers as long as the label clearly indicates women’s rather than men’s sizing. Like others, I see no point in wearing female type clothes but repurposed to suit a man’s body and also like Trace I now accept that uncomfortable panties are part of the CD’s burden as long as they are also pretty.
@veroslondon Veronica, you raise a really interesting point regarding crossdressers vs. transgender. I had a nephew, who is now a niece, come out as transgender about a year ago. When she first came out, I was excited to offer my support (most of her family has not accepted her change at all), and, thinking we had something in common, I came out as a crossdresser to her — the first in my extended family to know. I expected we would bond over our common interests, but it really hasn’t happened to any great extent, and it became clear to me over time that her transgenderism had very little to do with clothes, but everything to do with her body. As I’ve been reading more here on Crossdresser Heaven over the last six months since I joined, I’m seeing an increasingly obvious difference between crossdressing and transgender. While I would love to have larger breasts and a more feminine shape, I don’t want to become a woman or give up my penis. My driving need is more about feminine clothing, bras, panties, and dresses especially, more than feeling I’m in the wrong body. I was just in the wrong clothing. Not sure if that makes any sense, but I’m pretty sure there are others who can relate. Thanks for your comments!
Hi Trace
Thanks so much for sharing this story. It’s so refreshing to hear about real life examples of how broad the transgender spectrum is versus someone’s opinions presented as facts. We often hear people say that they know how someone feels about something that has happened to them when in reality it’s impossible to know what is going on in someone else’s head. CD’s mostly talk about how good it feels to wear women’s clothes but even that simple statement covers an almost infinite range of preferences and desires. I once met a girl at a local CD event who would only wear 1950’s style clothes including all the associated underwear such as girdle, stockings and big flouncy petticoats . Apparently there are stores and websites that specialise in this type of clothing, selling sizes that are clearly geared towards men. Clearly for this particular CD passing amongst a group or crowd of other women was not the objective but putting on a performance was. Then of course there is the whole “sissy” side of cross-dressing which is clearly about wearing clothes that conform to a particular fetish format and are not about passing. Over time I have realised that it’s not really worth trying to relate to why some CD’s want to only dress in one particular way. In effect, it isn’t possible for me to understand what specific pleasure they got from it. But since then, I have also realised that I can’t explain why it is that for me the pleasure comes from adopting current trends and always trying at least to look like the women around me which is just another style of dressing when all is said and done. I think it may put me somewhat towards the transgender end of the spectrum but if so that fact doesn’t really change anything.
However, I think what is important is while you may not be able to understand or relate to someone’s trans preferences that’s no reason to think any the less of them for that. I’m still puzzled by some of the hostility we CD’s have to accept from the transgender and radical feminist communities because, I understand, they think in some we are not “genuine”. For TG’s we don’t want to change our bodies and for feminists we can never be “real” women. At one time the LBGT community was made up of all gender non-conforming groups but no longer. It seems to have splintered like a lot of radical political movements seem to do. It’s sad, there is enough nastiness in the world without inventing new reasons for it!
I couldn’t agree more. I want to wear women’s clothes not women’s clothes designed for a man.
There’s something wonderful about wearing clothing designed with a woman in mind. It makes me feel like a woman
I crave the real thing! And I love being a girl! Thanks for a wonderful article. So confirming of all of my own feelings.
I’m happy to take the men’s v women’s thing out of the argument and go with wearing what I like and what feels comfortable. I don’t use waist or hip shapers or wear heels because I find them uncomfortable. I already have a 42″ chest, so enhance minimally in that area to achieve some outline without being too top heavy. I like comfortable, delicate panties and like to hide any bump disturbing my dress or skirt outline. If I like what I see and I like wearing it, that does me. As for the crossdressing thing – there are those who would argue that clothes are just clothes and who wears what is a thing of social construct that’s constantly changing. As Eddie Izzard reportedly said, “They’re not women’s clothes, they’re my clothes. I bought them.” I think all of us have different reasons for dressing; mine are fairly deep rooted and my style ideals have changed over time. But if they put dresses in the men’s department, would I not wear them simply because they were deemed menswear?
Trace – This is spot on for me as well. I have a collection on men’s panties, which fit me quite well and are made of a soft satin fabric, but when I wear women’s panties with a little bow or lace, it’s just different. Maybe that’s why I like an occasional thong, that feeling of the outer clothing against my bottom is a constant reminder of what I am wearing, Not to mention where the string goes!
I can not comment on Mens Bras. I have never worn them. But I do enjoy naturally filling my B cups, My Pocket Bras and D Forms are for when I feel like presenting fully.
Thank you for the article, I don’t read many of them, but this caught my eye.
Hugs!
Your story is spot on. I agree with you whole heartedly. If it is not designed for a woman. I don’t want to wear it. I have had several female friends tell me about lingerie designed for men. Thanks but no thanks. I grew up wearing my mom and sisters lingerie. That is what I am accustomed to wearing. Gives me that feminine feeling that I desire.
I have to agree with your article and most of the responses so far. I have seen websites advertising women’s lingerie made specifically for men but what is the point in that. We wear our lingerie and other things because we want to feel our feminine selves come out and our clothing needs to align with that goal. To do that we need clothes made specifically for women. Not some poor imitation made for a man. If I want to wear clothes made for a man, I can wear the drab clothes I have already. There is nothing more feminine to me than sliding my silky panties on as well as my other pretty lingerie. It is what I need to allow my feminine side to exist.
Hugs,
Emily
I can agree with you to a point but whenever I “have to wear” male undies, I choose the ones that are just as silky as my female panties. They are just as colorful but lack the little bow in front or the gusset seams. And whenever I have to!pee, I can either choose the stall and sit like a lady or stand proud at a urinal and whip out my penis. Women can also mimic this manly pose by using a She-wee (an actual product) made for women so they can stand while urinating.
Oh Trace, I agree. Most likely most of us started with actual women’s clothes, particularly lingerie, and I think we tend to stick there. I also have a natural 46B chest and find that women’s bras fit quite well. I always wear women’s panties, but I do tend to stick to the wider gusset styles, it’s just more comfortable for me. I have been tempted to order made fr cross dresser high heels, being that women tend to have a more narrow foot which can make wearing women’s heels uncomfortable, especially after a few hours, but with some searching I still can find women’s heels in the 4″ range that are comfortable and I can wear all evening. Also, it seems that as I move more and more into being Jennifer full time, and I ?think? more and more like a woman, I think that shopping for women’s clothes helps keep me in the right frame of mind. After all, if the clothes are made for men who want to cross dress, then they are clothes made for men, and I don’t want to think like that any more. And, to be honest, I find that the cross dressing products made for men are a bit ridiculously priced. It is a big market out here, and it’s being exploited to the max. I guess it just comes down to who you are. If you’re a man who likes to dress like a woman once in awhile, maintaining your male side, then feminine clothes made for a man are just the thing. But if you’re a female inside, and want to move in that direction, then, to me, you gotta feel and think feminine, and shopping for women’s clothes is all part of it. There’s something for everyone, that’s what makes this life great.
Hugs,
Jennifer
Hi all.
I certainly have to agree with you Trace. I wear womens clothing because of how it makes me feel, like I am more feminine. Whether it is just a bra and panties, or full outfits. I dress because it makes me feel like a woman, and dont want it to be made for a man to feel comfortable while trying to look like a woman, I want it to be completely for a woman to be as feminine as I can when dressing. I work as a man, but always dress in ladies attire when I leave the house for work, not always completely enfemne, but mostly, coats, sweaters shoes, even makeup somedays. I usually stop somewhere along the way at a store or for breakfast, gas, etc. It just starts the day better. Then begrudgingly havinging to change into my work clothes before getting to work, because Im not out to thoughs that know me personally or I hang with or I work with dailey. Waiting for the moment I can head home and change back into my Lady’s clothing when I get home for the evening, and just be me.
You speak my ❤ heart. I have a few pair of men’s jockey type briefs, but I can’t remember when I haven’t worn a women’s bra and panties 24×7….lacy and satin of course! But I digress. I am gender fluid, which means I have a “Carlie” AND a “Charlie” inside of me although for the last several months, I’ve felt almost entirely Carlie. Yes. Trace…. no offense to any of the other girls, but it’s women’s attire for me! xx
ps,
I adore “Smart & Sexy” brand and I hope I’m within the guidlines by posting a photo of my “goto” lingerie.
I have similar panties. I prefer hi-cut panties with lace like these but I also like to wear briefs because I am able to hide the boys better. I have a small package – thank God – but I recently had a conversation with my PCP about cutting off the boys so I can wear sleeker and sexier panties without having to tuck. I no longer want to father children so why do I need testicles?
I can only assume that it would not be covered as “elective surgery” by most medical insurance carriers, but you’ve got me thinking. I had prostate cancer with a removal of said prostate over 10 years ago. “The boys” are simply hanging around with nothing to do!😂
I suppose that stores, such as Zara and Old Navy, have their “boyfriend” or men’s wear style women’s clothes for a reason.
There is nothing wrong buying panties with a 3″ gusset which can allow us to tuck without having to go through the arduous task of taping and dealing with retaping during a long day of it. A good panty can control us all day and probably into the night, too. A thong cannot do that. It isn’t going to make much difference what we wear under a lot of tight leggings. VPLs will be there, thong or no thong, so why not be comfortable, too? Is it any less feminine to be comfortable and/or practical? Female panties are female panties. I am not going to quibble over the degree of feminine. I will quibble over functionality, comfort, and practicality.
I can totally relate to what Trace is saying here in this article. I have no interest whatsoever in wearing bras and panties designed for men. I wear bras and panties to feel feminine, to look feminine and maybe most important of all to express and celebrate my own innate femininity.
I think, that forme, to wear bras and panties designed for men would make me like I’m a man dressed in drag. Not that there is anything inherently wrong with that. It’s just not who I am, or who I want to be.
I have all but give up on the idea of ever being or becoming a woman. Or at least being or becoming a woman in the sense that my beloved mother was and my beloved sister is. For me the goal is to be as feminine as it is possible for me to be, physically, mentally and emotionally. Bras and panties, I feel, just would not help me reach that goal to the fullest level of which I seek to achieve.
Couldn’t agree with you more, Trace!! Call me old fashioned, but men’s bras are for the non-crossdressing cis male. When in full femme, every article of apparel that I wear is just that…. women’s clothing.
I feel the same as you Trace. I have spent too much time locking away my femineity to make any compromises. I’m looking forward to the day when my entire wardrobe is feminine and I can live authentically 24/7/365. In the meantime, its lace, floral patterns, and pastel colors every second I can!
Hello, my 2 cents worth. I grew up wearing womens clothes. Clothes for men made to look like womens just did not excite me.
I have sports bras and nice tee shirt bras. I use the padding that comes with them to fill out them out. It is fun.
I tend to agree with you, I want to wear women’s clothes though the truth is I’ve never tried lingerie for men and maybe it would be nice too.
Right now I don’t have breasts so I use breast forms, which fits a 38C bra, but I’d love to have real ones! Perhaps at some point in the future.
I’m with everyone on this topic, unless its a “proper” femme brand of bras/ lingerie, I am not interested.
Am Australian company (Homme Mystere) was quite successful earlier on with “lingerie designed for men”
But as I look at their website these days, they are really struggling, with lots… of pieces on sale. Same again for another much smaller company.
As a sidelight, we have at lest one lingerie store here in Melbourne that opening advertises that they will do a personal bra fitting for “blokes”.
https://illusionslingerie.com.au/pages/crossdressing-fittings
I had a fitting there earlier this year, had a lovely experience…Check out my aricle here onCDH about the day.
BUT!! BUT!!!
At least use a model with a hairless chest!!! YUK! YUK! YUK!
Happy (lingerie) dressing
Caty.
Hi girls, there are several companies that advertise right here on CDH and TGH, who make feminine fashions and lingerie designed to fit the male physique. I actually ordered several things from one of them. I was quite disappointed. The fabric was cheap and the items were very baggy, so it was money down the drain as the items went straight into the garbage.
I am an intersex person, and when puberty happened my body went in the wrong direction for an AMAB person. I got the feminine treatment and got tiny private parts, along with boobs, hips, bum and thighs.
All my life men’s wear never fit me. Long sleeves and slacks were always way too long, men’s briefs were always way to baggy, and shoes never fit. I basically inherited my mom’s facial features and her physique. Now that I have transitioned and wear nothing but women’s clothing each day, all of my ladies wear fits me like a glove! Even footwear as I have feet that fit the typical last of a women’s shoe better than typical men’s shoes. I’m a perfect lady’s size 14 or a lady’s L, XL if it’s a petite size.
Hugs,
Ms. Lauren M
I have to agree with all. I have a couple of “male” g strings but it is the experience for me of wearing the other sexes clothing. Some is the initial hope it fits them the feeling as you put them on and hopefully for me the transformation. I am not public about my cross dressing I underdress daily and walk around thinking am I wearing better ones than you when out. Also my wife brought me some ladies underwear for Xmas which wouldn’t occur wearing the made for men option
Boringly enough, I also agree that I wouldn’t bother with ‘lingerie for men’.
The only bras for men that I have seen, so far, are in sets with little skirts. Light blue and pink in checked colour.
I would neither buy nor wear them.