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Unlike most of the members here, I came late to crossdressing. As is well documented elsewhere on the site and many times in the chat room, I only started crossdressing in my early fifties. So what happened? Why did this happen "out of the blue"? The whole experience has caused me to ponder these and similar questions on numerous occasions and, whilst I have no definitive answers, I realize that perhaps this late onset was not as sudden or unexpected as it seemed. When I think back on my life so far, there are several subtle hints that individually mean nothing, but collectively perhaps suggest that there was more to me than met the eye.
I vaguely recall that when I was very young, (pre-school age) when getting ready to go somewhere, my grandmother would always lick her middle and index fingers before scrunching my hair into a "wave". Almost without fail she would comment to my mother "With hair like this, he should have been a girl." I never thought anything of it except that I had nice hair.
During my primary school years, I did all the usual boy things: played footy and cricket (neither all that well), marbles, cowboys & indians, Robin Hood, William Tell etc. I had a collection of Matchbox cars, the usual boy comics and a good collection of Biggles books. At the same time, I had no difficulty playing tea parties with my sisters and cousins (most of whom were girls). I never played dress ups and I'm sure I didn't play with dolls by myself but occasionally joined them when that's what they were doing. I also read The Magic Faraway Tree and many Secret Seven and Famous Five books.
Apart from being one of only a few boy cousins in a sea of girls, I was also the oldest of the kids in our neighborhood. I used to take the younger kids under my wing so to speak and when we were playing organized games, I always made sure that no one was left out. At one stage the adults of the area used to refer to me as The Pied Piper. Whilst it would be incorrect to say that this empathy & nurturing behavior is absent in the masculine, they are characteristics more usually associated with the feminine. I never thought anything of it, it just seemed natural and the right thing to do.
I was never jealous of my sisters although, from my perspective at least, they had it easier than me. At the time I attributed this to expectations for the eldest son that was so common in the '60s and the usual economic situation that exists in most families where life becomes less arduous as time goes on and the mortgage shrinks. However, I do now believe that overall, girls have it easier in the early years, at least from the point of view of more freedom to express themselves and often less expectation. Not that this is necessarily right, it's just the way it is in most cases.
Into adolescence, I had long hair (didn't everyone?), wore V-knee jeans, flairs or baggies & platform shoes with pastel colored or paisley body shirts. Hey, it was the 70s and I didn't stand out at all. However, thinking back on it, I did pay probably more attention to my appearance than many of my mates.
Fast forward 40 years and I sit now fully waxed, with painted toenails, earrings, anklet & toe rings, wondering whether these early tendencies were perhaps indicators of something more that was successfully suppressed by prevailing social norms.
Wonderful !
Very insightful, thank you.
A wonderful piece of introspection.
Maxine,
Its a joy to have you back here honey.
An interesting piece.
Thank you
Sue
xxx
Thank you for this article I enjoyed reading . I do relate to much of what you have said and I still today wondering why this is happening. The 70,'s oh yes the clothes, the hair on my shoulders , a time of experiences and memory's locked in time. Happy to be here now.
Hi Maxien,
Great article. Yes the having to know Why. Looking for things in the past that might give us answers. We have all probably done this at one time or anther or still do. Wouldn't it be great if we could get a definitive one. But it is like many of life's Mystery's. Why ?
Thanks for the story.
Thanks Maxine for sharing your experiences in the 70’s . Altough the 60’s & 70’s were a part of my life but I chose a more conservative style.
However, I have come full circle and have been dressing part time for the pass 10 years .
I loved your article and looking forward to the next one... “fully waxed, with painted toenails, earrings, anklet & toe rings” got my attention!
Leonara
Great to see you back here Maxine, I would love to catch up and chat anytime you have free
My mother used to dress me up in heels, skirt a blouse and makeup at the age of 4, my mother got sick so no more dress up but on thing that kept with was wow I feel sexy and comfortable, but never came out about my preference. As years went on, I started with panties, before thongs, now today I'm thinking about fully cross over full-time
MAXINE !!!! Great to hear from you again.
Don't be a stranger, and thanks for sharing.
Big Hugs,
Samantha
Great read! So many similarities in my life too.
Hugs and kisses, Dana
Interesting Maxine, as your childhood sounds a lot like mine. Grew up in the 60s with a sister and all girl cousins. Did the usual guy things, not poorly, but never really all that well either. Liked cooperation more than competition. But I was CD from an early age, although I had no idea what that was at the time. All I knew was that I loved dressing and makeup.
Nice to hear a story of someone finding themselves later in life. I kind of had a rebirth at 58, so I can relate a bit.
Hugs,
April
Going through the same experience in my 50's. Feels like the adolescence I should have had. Thanks so much for sharing your story. It definitely helps xx