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    • #404740

      On occasion I have worn some of my wife’s clothes without her knowledge. She does not know that I cross dress. It has always been when I am the only one at home and I want to be feminine for a short period of time. I am always careful to try and replace the items back in just the right place  from where I borrowed them. I am curious if others on this website might do this too? We are close to the same in size so I do not stretch or damage her clothes. I know others will tell me I shouldn’t do this, but the urge to dress up is strong sometimes. I cant be the only one who does this. Have you borrowed others clothes without their knowledge?

    • #404748

      I have borrowed my wife’s dresses. Thanks to Amazon and some ultra strict privacy rules at work I now have 12 of my own dresses.

      I much prefer my own.

      Lee Ann

    • #404760

      Oh yeah. Used to wear mom’s clothes when I first started and I took the utmost care in making sure they were placed exactly as I had found them. Still borrow the fiancés clothes and still take the same care in placing them back the exact way in which they were found. It’s just part of the deal. It’s what we do until that courage from nowhere comes into play and we go out and get our own clothes to wear. This depends a lot on if we feel we have a secure hiding place for said clothes.

      Borrowing clothes has and will be a part of what we do. For a lot of us it’s how we started. And for others it’s how they continue. Having been a CD for a very long time I have a great understanding of this . I started this way and I still do it to an extent though I feel bad about it now as I don’t want to damage my fiancés clothing but she isn’t cool with me having my own so ya gotta do what ya gotta do to help the urge for away. Even if it’s just a few minutes of bliss.

    • #404764
      Anonymous

      My wife is a size 4-6 I’m 10-14 so sharing is a no go… I just stand at her closet and drool

    • #404770

      My wife and I share the same shoe size (9M), other than that my wardrobe is mine all mine.  I haven’t ‘borrowed’ another woman’s clothes since i got my drivers license.

    • #404789
      BillieJay
      Managing Ambassador

      I haven’t worn my wife’s clothing in years… though she did recently give me a bra (underwire, she can’t wear them, she bought it by accident) but even with my largest forms the cups are too big.

      funny, she frequently “borrows” my wedges and heels…

    • #404795

      My SO and I have been together for 20 years and thank goodness she is on a weight loss kick. I get all of her hand me downs 🥰. She is a smaller chest then me, so bra hand me downs don’t happen. But we both wear a 10-12 jeans so we share a lot. Male mode is becoming a faded memory, when it comes to buying new clothes for him. Some times when we used to go shopping we would toss clothes up and over and find things the other liked. And a few times fought over getting the same dress. But Josie would fill it out better 💖😂

      We both like our own things for sure. It’s been so much easier since she accepted Josie with open arms.

      💖🤍🖤💜💙

      ~Josie

    • #404800

      No, I can’t say that I have. They would have to be grossly oversized in order for it to work.

      However, have you considered the consequences if you get caught?

    • #404853
      Caty Ryan
      Baroness

      This would have to be the biggest “no no” any crossdresser can undertake. “hell have no fury etc etc”…

      Even tho anyone who indulges in the above thinks they will get away with it long term is deluding themselves. Sooner or later a mistake will be made, wrong drawer, dress not hung back properly and if the “lady of the house” is anti crossdressing, the next step for the offender is a divorce lawyer.

      So think about it very carefully and in this Covid day and age, just go buy your own things. starting with lingerie and make up. No retail business is gunna knock back your “hard earned’s”, they are losing to much from the Bug as it is.

      If personal shopping is too difficult, get a paypal a/c or your own credit card and go hire a parcel locker or PO box.

      That’s how I’ve bought 80% of Caty’s things for years..

       

      Good luck

      Caty

       

       

       

       

       

    • #404866
      Anonymous

      Hi

      I am single, but if anyone even went near my clothes or make up, I would go ballistic!!!!….and touch my heels??…you really wouldn’t like me when I’m angry…

      haha, smiles, grace xx

    • #404867
      Emily Alt
      Managing Ambassador

      Tough love here V. You’re asking for trouble. Sooner or later it’ll find you. The only thing worse than your wife discovering you’re a CD is her discovery that you secretly wear her things. Just get your own clothes and find a good place to hide them. Better yet, find a way to tell her. Coming out is always better and you get to keep some dignity. Plenty of girls here on CDH can help you with that.

    • #404873
      Peta Mari
      Lady

      When I come out to my wife, she said don’t wear her undergarments, including bras.

      We both agreed that was a bit grotty.  And I havent. Everything else has been tried on.

      I have since lost 45kg. None of her clothes fit me. Back then I had to be careful not to stretch anything… very careful.

      Buy your own clothes.

       

       

    • #404898

      I didnt borrow my wifes clothes, as she is “now” a tiny woman, and nothing would fit, but i would be terrified of her finding out, so when I decided to embrace this, i bought my own.
      Now, since coming out on the weekend, she has gone into her closets and found all the stuff she had bought too big, and given them to me:-)
      So,I am a triple lucky girl:-)

    • #404912

      at one point of time i was wearing my wifes dresses and skirts, she found out and told me not to  wear her dresses i am stretching them out.  so i started to buy my own dresses, skirts , blouses, nylons, panties, bra and even pads, make up, perfume, ear rings. she found out a few years back that i was cross dressing but did not say any thing to me about itll i started to strech her cloths out, she was a thin person at 1 time and now she can not fit into her dresses.   so i took over her dresses, skirts, blouses. i even got my mothers blouses when she passed away in 2013. i only dress up when our 23 year old son is at work and wife will tell me i can do what i like to do and i do , i feel happy, less depressed, no panic attacks. and mostly feminine, the way i should be feeling. the clothing is so much more comfortable to wear, better fit and looks sexy on me for i have a feminine figure body.

    • #404924

      My wife recently lost a good bit of weight (good for her).  And as she has gone through her closet, choosing which things to donate away, she has picked a few things out for me, and put them in my “Stephanie Closet.”

      She even lies to me, and tells me they look better on me than they did on her.

      My coming out as a crossdresser was a little bit of a shock to her.  But recently she has been more accepting.  And now she’s picking out clothes for me.  I feel wonderful.

    • #404925

      Before I came out to my wife as CDer, I did wear her clothes.  She would take evening courses at the university so that would be my golden chance to dress up.

      We are approximately the same size, with me being a tad bigger.  I can tell you that women will know (women’s intuition ?) that someone has been wearing their stuff.  To them, their clothes have a certain fit, and even if you are very close in size, after wearing it a few times you put that fit out of whack, and they will know.  Even if you put the clothing exactly in the same spot, the clothes you wore will leave your smell/scent on it, and women can pick up on that smell.  It doesn’t smell like them anymore, it smells more like you.

      My wife knew for a long time that I have been wearing her stuff, but she didn’t say anything.  Not until I came out she said she had a strong hunch I wore her stuff because I stretched some of her clothing.

      After coming out I stopped wearing her stuff and bought clothing just for Wendy.

      Trust me, it is a very fine line you are walking on.  And they just know.

    • #404929

      I have but she never wears her skirts.  I would tend to get sweaters that she had worn out of the laundry bin, my theory was that washing them should help remove some stretching.  Once I built up my own collection I stopped but will take things out of the goodwill bag if she is getting rid of something.  Generally they are too short in the arms so I wear them a few times and then off to goodwill they go.

    • #404952

      Not really without her knowledge as we share a closet, panty drawer, and hair things. She often puts me into her things to show me off to her friends. I have my own girl things and she sometimes wears mine!

    • #404956
      Kimmie
      Lady

      For a short while I “borrowed” my wife’s panties. They didn’t really fit so I soon just started buying my own. I strongly agree with the people urging you to stop. I suspect most women would consider it an invasion of privacy and make it harder for her to understand and accommodate your dressing. The internet and online shopping helped a great deal. (Now, the problem is keeping myself from buying too many things!)

      I started by wearing my mom’s clothes when I was quite young. The problem then was not stretching anything out, but rather being sufficiently carful that she didn’t notice.

    • #404988

      Early on, I wore my mom’s and my sister’s clothes. When I got married, I wore a few of my wife’s things, but limited it to panties and a few dresses that tended to be a bit larger. Eventually, I stopped wearing her clothes and now keep a few clothes that I bought for me that I like and where them when I can.

      I think my wife would know now if I wore any of her stuff and since she despises my dressing, I would not wear anything of hers as she does not know about my time as Janice.

    • #404989

      It’s certainly not wrong to borrow your wife’s clothes – sometimes (not iften!) my wife will put items of her clothing on me.

      Never borrow her clothes without asking!

      Yeah, most married cross dressers have, and I am no exception – although not since I’ve had my own femme wardrobe – treat it like a golden rule 🤗

      If you find the urge hard to resist, buy similar items for yourself…

      Love Laura

    • #405145

      When I was young I would sneak moms clothes but they were always to big for me. Skip to later years and married, I was always much bigger than my wives so nothing would ever fit. I always had to buy something for me to wear but I didn’t usually buy much. Now I am buying everything I can get my hands on. I figure this way I will lose weight since I will have no food money left.

    • #405241
      Anonymous

      Same here, although I wish my lady had more lingerie to choose from especially more thongs. I guess I’m the more feminine one.

    • #406206
      Anonymous

      yes I have as well. The issue is if she finds out that you’ve been wearing her clothes and she doesn’t know your a CD it may be a bad result. I would buy your own. Woman are very funny when it comes to their clothes as well they are very observant, She will notice things are out of place and eventually catch you. My wife found out about me due to her panties. She never caught me but when we had the talk she went right to the panties and said I knew you were wearing my panties. Buy your own that way you can avoid the double whammy!!!

    • #406241

      Never wear you wife’s clothes….EVER!

      -SR-

    • #406478
      Becka
      Lady

      We are very different sizes, so I could not.  Although I did initially try on some of her panties to get an idea of style and size.

       

    • #406865
      Patty Phose
      Duchess

      I introduced my wife to Patty a couple of weeks after we met. I wasn’t planning on it but she surprised me showing up at my place and seeing lots of women’s clothes lying about. I had been dressing often for a couple of years and had a very nice wardrobe. I decided to tell her the clothes were mine. I wore them for fun and to parties.

      She seemed suspicious and asked me to show her. I went in the bedroom and purt on one of my favorite and sexiest outfits with wig and makeup . The whole deal. When I walked out, she was stunned. she could not believe how pretty and sexy I was. She also found it hard to believe I was the same person. I looked so different. She liked it.

      I dressed often at home with her. We even became girl friends going out together often doing girly things, especially shopping.

      I never wore her clothes, at least not many of them. We are too different in size. Her things are just too small for me and mine swim on her. But when she has something I really love we try to get it in my size also and visa versa. So for the most part we have our own and separate wardrobes.

    • #408713

      Wow that brought back some memories! Since I am now with my 3rd wife, I have learned a thing or two as the years have passed. While married to my first & second wife, there were occasions when I borrowed some of their things, stocking, panties, lingerie, and with the first one, I was able to borrow her heels as well. Did my best to always put things back as they were, and to be sure I wasn’t wearing deodorant or cologne. There was never a time when they asked me if I was borrowing their things, nor was I ever caught. At the time I felt too ashamed of what I was doing to even bring it up in conversation, nor did I have an understanding of why I felt the urge to dress. At the start of my 3rd marriage, I had reached the point where I had a few things of my own (thank you internet!), and I had them well hidden, so she never knew that I was dressing while she was at work. After our kids were born, I had decided to purge once again, and it was almost two years from that time until we had ‘The Talk’. Fortunately for me, she was more understanding that I expected, and willing to listen to what I had to say. Since that moment, Heather has her own wardrobe, while not extensive, it has a nice selection of outfits, heels, and (oh my) way too many panties! There have been times when she will leave out a top or dress for me to wear, because she feels it would look nice on me. Once in a while, she will even offer up a few of her lingerie items that I can borrow for our evening together. We do laugh that there is one dress that we both tend to like, and it is the only one I have ever worn outside of the house. I’m glad that she is accepting of who I am, and likes knowing that I can be her husband or her BFF. It has all come about because we are honest with one another, and we have found a place for Heather in our marriage. I guess the one thing that I know for sure is that it’s been a matter of respect and love that makes it work for us. As a result of that, I have always felt that her things are just that, her things, and I would not take anything without first asking her.

    • #408749
      Shana Mac
      Lady

      When my not really gf found out the second thing she said was keep you g.. D… Hands off my clothes and I f…… Mean it. I didn’t wear her stuff anyway because no matter how careful I could be she would know in like .01 seconds. Once when we were out of town at family’s house she got me to come outside and talk. She had started and was flooding and asked if I had some underwear she could borrow. Lol of course I did.

    • #408753
      Mona
      Duchess

      Wore her a few items of her clothes in my early days.  Still have fond memories of a particular bathing suit.  But now in my mature years, I totally agree with other girls here – don’t do it.  You say she doesn’t know about your CDing.  If/when she finds out, it’s likely to be a huge shock – both in terms of the act itself and the secrecy over many years.  And in the fact that you wear her clothes and it takes it to a whole other dimension of difficulty.

      Find a way to purchase your own clothes – either online or at stores.  I shop exclusively at the fine ladies emporium known at Goodwill (thrift store).  I have no problem finding amazing dresses.  I shop openly among the racks of women’s dresses, skirts, tops, etc.  Guess what? Nobody seems to notice or care.  Checkout folks often compliment my choices and most assume I’m buying for my wife.  Also, it’s worth checking out the shoe selection – it is a happy day when I find an elusive pair of size 12 heels (probably donated by a fellow CD in the midst of a purge).

      Good luck,

      Mona

    • #408765
      Scarlett398
      Princess

      Why yes, Vanity, I do it on a regular basis even though my femme wardrobe is as extensive as hers now!

      She allows me to borrow whatever I want because we are the same size and she can borrow anything she wants from my wardrobe. The only restriction be places on me is I have to return the item exactly where I found it from.

      She’s a first class organizer and has everything in her massive closet laid out by dresses, tops, skirts, dress slacks, and jeans and everything is organized in each section of clothing from light colors to dark colors left to right.

      I’m Scarlett’s room, it’s basically mass chaos. The only thing that looks organized and neat are the many 54 inch long dress breathable travel bags I keep up to seven dresses or tops or skirts in. I purchase them on Amazon from “Bags For Less” for just over 7 bucks per travel bag and once you start using them to store you clothing in, you’ll never be able to stop buying them. I have at least 50 of them with many of them in a huge temperature controlled storage unit that’s 20 feet by 20 feet in size and it’s right across the hallway from my wife’s storage unit that’s the exact same size. Both of us love to shop and have a ton of femme clothing! So we have to spend two days every six months exchanging our Fall and Winter clothing items and footwear for our Spring and Summer clothing items of footwear. Trust me, it takes several trips to swap everyting out every six months.

      The only thing we don’t wear the same size in is footwear. She’s an 8.5 and I’m an 11.

      Great question and glad you’re almost in the same situation I’m in!

      XOXOXO Scarlett

    • #408781

      Honestly, my wife and I are very different sizes. I’m much taller and a lot slimmer. Our shoe size is very different too. I’m a bit jealous of the girls here that can share clothes with their wives. I have never even discussed the idea with my wife because of our size differences so I don’t know how she would feel about it otherwise.

    • #408784
      Anonymous

      In the past, (before Bettylou, actually), I wore one of my wife’s dresses a couple of times when she was away at work.  But now that I am out to her, I have my own complete wardrobe, next to hers in the closet.  We do share a few items of clothing and jewelry.

    • #408801

      Clearly the majority is correct here, borrowing your significant others clothes has a chance to blow up in your face very badly. I did it for the longest time I’ve been married over 20 years and only had the talk with my wife earlier this year. I think it was in the middle of my second sentence to her when I said “well yeah of course I was wearing your things but I was always careful to put them right back” not knowing at the time what a no-no it was. Hearing this didn’t bother her at all, she was just perplexed as to how she never noticed, honestly I was confused as well because she’s such a neat freak, at any rate my wife once again showed me how lucky I truly am.

      • #410846
        Scarlett398
        Princess

        Good for you Cindy Lou and that’s at least as long as I’ve been borrowing clothes from my wife’s closet. She doesn’t mind at all and she’s a super organized neat freak just like your wife! As long as I put everyting right back in its original place. It’s easy to do if you just take the item off the hanger and keep the hanger in place in the closet. It’s also easier if you’re the same size as your own wife like I am so you don’t have to stretch everything out.

        My wife knows my wardrobe for Scarlett is now as extensive as her’s and she’s always welcome to borrow anything she wants out of my three closets as well!

        I always exercise and shower before each and everyone of my photo shoots so the only thing I ever have to worry about is getting makeup on a small area of something like a turtle neck top. However, with those Mr. Clean Magic Erasers we have at our disposal now, removing makeup from any type of clothing is a piece of cake!

        Take care girls and Happy Thanksgiving from Scarlett, her Sexy Redhead, and our corgie doggies – Sully and Scarlett!

        • #410875

          Youre certainly living the life Scarlett! My wife and I can share some clothes, some others are too small for her 😉 but as for shoes, were almost exactly the same size and she’s got quite a collection, I should know, I bought half of them for her.

          • #410882
            Scarlett398
            Princess

            Same here Cindy Lou and the reason why if you looked into my three closest and her three closets, you couldn’t tell whose closet you were in because I’ve picked out just about everything she has in all three of her closets. She leans on me heavily for my femme sense of style. She won’t even buy a purse if I’m not there to give her the two thumbs up on the purchase. I even help her pick out her makeup!

            Before I retired, I held a high profile job with the Department of Defense and I used to purchase all of her clothing and footwear. Now she’s the one with the high profile job and she pays for most all of her clothes and footwear with me there to coach her up!

            I never thought I would see the day, Cindy Lou, when we could shop together in the girl’s, lady’s, and junior’s departments at the same time with her picking out her dresses, tops, and skirts and me doing the same for Scarlett and us putting all items in the same shopping cart and then checking out at the same register together. She usually has me go first purchasing all of Scarlett’s things and then she purchases her things right after I’m done.

            We are both very blessed and lucky to have the wives we have! It took years and years to get her but I never ever have to purge or go back into any cross dressing closet ever again!

            Happy Thanksgiving again girlfriend! XOXOXO Scarlett

          • #410883

            Thanks so much for your response Scarlett. For the last little while I’ve also been helping my wife add some pizazz to her wardrobe. She has taste and style but works really hard and just doesn’t have the time to put the thought into it. I totally get what you mean though I just love it when she asks for my opinion on how an outfit looks, like you said I never thought I would see the day. In the meantime keep posting and putting up your lovely pictures, you’re an inspiration.

          • #411089
            Scarlett398
            Princess

            Thank Baby Doll! You wouldn’t believe the hundreds of times each year I hear the words “inspire” or “inspiration” from these girls. They seem to really enjoy my keen sense of style! I guess you can tell I put a lot of work and energy into each and everyone of my photo shoots done all alone right here at our dream home in Northwest Florida.

            Can’t wait for you to see the results of next week’s photo shoots scheduled for Monday and Thursday of next week!

            XOXOXO Scarlett

    • #410996

      I wear my wife’s clothing all the time. She is a bit smaller than I, so not all fit and I don’t overdo it or stretch them out. She is somewhat of a clothing hoarder and never throws clothing out, so if I use the less worn items, there has never been any problems. I’ve been wearing her clothing secretly ever since we started dating in college, 25+ years ago. She has some absolutely beautiful Boden wrap dresses that seem to fit me very well. I certainly have many favorites. But its not just dresses, I wear her panties, tights, bras, tops, skirts too, even some “old” shoes that I can fit into. Always in secret though. It is somewhat disconcerting when she wears a dress that I have recently worn. Also, when we get catalogs I often will tell her that she would look great in this one or that, thinking all the time how I really want it! I have so many memories of wearing her clothing. Such a crossdressing history. If only she would accept…

    • #411114

      Yes I have done this. My wife still does not know after 25 years of marriage.

    • #411171
      Cath N.
      Baroness

      I can’t get my head around how many of you do this and can’t see what a massive breach of ownership this is, which part of “this doesn’t belong to you” were you not taught? Unless something is offered, it is not yours to wear. Let alone that wearing someone else’s underwear is incredibly unhygenic and a huge danger for women’s PH balance that can cause long-term issues.

      Just adding more issues to a problem, and another thing to come clean about to your SOs…

    • #411184
      Anonymous

      I do dress in my wife’s clothes sometimes as well. She has however given me permission as she knows I am a crossdresser, maybe she does not know the full extent but she knows and supports me none the less. She has told me I can wear anything of hers I want as long as I will not permanently stretch it out. I have a wonderful wife.

    • #603497

      My parents taught me that I have to ask the person to lend me that item. But it is not natural for me to ask; I better make my money and buy that thing if I like it.

    • #603519
      Anonymous

      Mine doesn’t own anything I’d want to wear anyway! And I’m a smaller size. And prettier.

      Connie
      xxx

      • #603526

        lol x

        • #603580
          Anonymous

          ……and younger….

          Connie
          xxx

    • #603525
      Anonymous
      Lady

      I never wore any of my wifes clothes because being in the closet I was afraid of her noticing and we aren’t the same size anyway.

      After I came out to her she saw some of my pretty Bali panties and asked if she could try a pair. She normally wore cotton granny panties but liked the ones I had so now we both wear the same styles. She has hers and I have mine.

    • #603532

      I do as it is my only option, currently. I think she is on to me, though, as she used to have some nice things but they seem to be hidden now 🙁

      • This reply was modified 2 years ago by Isshe.
    • #603539

      My wife must be somewhat knowledgeable to my ‘borrowing’ some of her things. Being the one that does a lot of the laundry, it’s rather commonplace for me to clean her things. I never use her panties; they’re nothing I’d like to wear, as in ‘not my cup of tea.’ Long ago when I was very young, after my mother first dressed me in a cute little blue dress with ruffles and lace and a pair of my sister’s mary janes, I was welcome to ‘borrow’ from her things clear up into high school. If I would have had an “accident” in some panties, slips, or girdles, I was taught how to hand wash her dainty things.

    • #603563

      I could only WISH to be my wife’s size…

    • #603820

      [postquote quote=603497]
      I remember seeing a beautiful Prayer Dress at my cousin’s, and I was curious to try it, but I didn’t have the courage. I just asked her where she got the dress from and how much she paid. The next day I placed my order and bought a dress similar to hers, only with a different print.

    • #604928

      Last year my wife threw away a very nice bra.  I noticed it in the trash and fished it out.  I had previously purged all my girly things but the bra just brought it all back.  I would wear it and her panties and then hide it somewhere.  Thats when I decided to tell her and quite the hiding. As a result I am sitting here with her in panties, leggings, bra and satin floral robe (most of which she purchased for me).  I also wear a skirt of hers at times

    • #604956
      ChloeC
      Duchess

      I have done it, and like others have suggested, I’ve come to accept that it’s not the best of ideas.  I originally would do it as I had no other option (like wearing your mother’s things when you’re younger, not a good idea but really? where else?). I then started buying my own things, and while early purchases just didn’t quite fit well, I soon learned to select things closer to my size.

      Now, to be honest, there are clothes my spouse has completely stopped wearing (as her closet is pretty much full with clothes she barely wears), and she put those in drawers in the spare bedroom, and not only doesn’t get into the drawers, she doesn’t even go into the bedroom as we keep the door closed.  And our daughters are all grown and left years ago, leaving some things, again things my spouse just stored away (for what purpose I don’t know). And I’ve checked out some things, but again, most don’t fit.  I now pretty much stick to my own clothes for the times I’m able to dress (like my one bra that matches the forms I purchased).

    • #604959
      Anonymous

      I did very early on. Then lost weight is now basically a Size 0 so now chance of me getting in those. Guess that’s why stuck to lingerie. Now I can dress openly I am gathering clothes of my own. I get the odd hand me down from my wife. Latest is PU jeans UK size 6 that fit perfectly. The rule is do not wear your SO’s.

    • #604975

      Hey, Vanity. Good question/post!
      I can’t tell you what is right or wrong, acceptable and not, as every girl’s story and situation here on CDH is different and unique to her.

      I can only tell my story, and what is now my truth.

      You can read my profile for more, but basically my CD has been three phases.

      One was pre-first marriage when I occasionally wore some of my mothers things as a teen. Then no CD till my thirties.

      Second phase was during my first marriage. Her “magic” dress pulled me in and started my CD for real. I again occasionally wore some of her things, but she wore a smaller size. I was always afraid she’d find out. But to the best of my knowledge never did. At that time I was deeply in the closet because of religious beliefs and job issues. I felt I would have lost everything if found out. In hindsight that was probably false.

      That marriage ended with her cheating on me with an old boyfriend, and had nothing to do with my CD, to the best of my knowledge.

      The third phase, my life now, is radically different as I shared my CD before second marriage. It was such a relief to share that with my fiancé. Was I scared? Absolutely! But my wife accepted ALL of me. We are close enough in size that I can wear most of her clothes and even some shoes – with her blessing. However, our styles are very different. We have even occasionally went shopping together for me, Jules, often with me dressed. And her best friend is a compulsive shopper who has given me tons of her “discarded” clothes. So now I actually have as many clothes as my wife has.

      So what have I learned? Transparency and honesty are usually best, and although at times that might seem impossible, that least that should be the goal. Living in the closet for those thirty years was so stressful and life draining. And whether my first wife knew or not, I knew. I believe any “secret” of this magnitude is harmful, not only to the relationship but to one’s health.

      So, if CD is really an authentic part of your life, a part YOU can not live without then seek to do it openly – if possible. Maybe you can probe and explore your wife’s feelings on CD. For example make up a story about a man you “heard of” who was found out by his wife, and talk about it, asking her thoughts. I shared a great book “My Husband Betty with my wife to help her understand.

      But of course my disclaimer is that it could turn out badly. If she loves you, she will probably love ALL of you. But, sadly there are some here on CDH for whom transparently was a end to their relationship. Then for others, like myself, transparently has lead to genuine happiness, and endless days of carefree (no worries of being “caught”) of swirling pink fog laced heaven on earth.
      I wish you the very best, sweetheart.
      Hugs
      Jules

    • #605006

      Like some in the early years I would borrow my sisters pantyhose, then full slips and the odd time my moms pantyhose and bras.  Once with my wife I would wear her pantyhose but she knew about it and was ok with it.  But when I came out to her as a crossdresser which she was ok with and very understanding she asked only one thing and that was to not wear her clothes. Which I respected as I had a few of my owns things.
      As a result of coming out and no need to hide  things anymore I now have tons of tops, skirts, dresses well all my femme wear ftm and a pretty nice shoe and boot collection.

    • #605197
      Zoe
      Lady

      I have worn my sisters, my mothers, my wifes. I just had urges I couldn’t control to wear them.
      Eventually I started buying my own wardrobe.

    • #605234

      Only when we first got married and my dressing was still unknown to her.

      I had always had my own collection of lingerie I kept hidden but after we got married her wardrobe opened new possibilities to me. I had never worn a dress before and seeing all her pretty dresses hanging in the closet looked so inviting to me. It was only a matter of time before I just couldn’t resist wanting to know what it felt like and looked like wearing a dress over my lingerie.

      My wife one day asked me if I wouldn’t mind if she went out of town with her sister for a few days. I of course said “No I don’t mind” as my heart started pounding with excitement.

      I couldn’t believe I was going to be left home alone for 4 days with a closet full of dresses to put on and experience fully feminizing myself for the first time in my life. I didn’t just have dresses to try on but she had drawers full of pretty panties, bras, a couple of slips and stockings. She also had an extensive collection of makeup I could experiment with.

      The morning she left I headed to the mall and found a wig shop where I purchased my first wig. The minute I got home I striped out of my drab clothes, slipped into her feminine undergarments and put on my first dress along with my new wig. I was feeling like a real woman for the first time in my life and I was loving how wonderful it all felt.

      I stood there admiring what I was seeing in the mirror for a while until I calmed down and then began to spend hours on my makeup. By late the in the day I felt I had done a fairly good job with my total transformation and I just couldn’t resist taking my new look out the front door and into the world feeling like a complete woman.

      This was the beginning of taking my crossdressing to another level. Those were the most exciting four days of my life up until that point.

      As the years passed I have bought almost all of my own feminine clothing. I have about 7 or 8 of her dresses in my collection, now that she has gained a lot of weight and they no longer fit her.

      All of my lingerie I have purchased for myself because her undergarments just aren’t as pretty and feminine as I like to wear.

    • #605239

      For most of my marriage, I did this, too. However, it was with my (now late) wife’s knowledge – and frequently her participation.
      Importantly, though, I never felt comfortable in her clothes (other than certain panties of the right style and cut – as in that department we were both size “medium”) and I put this down to women’s clothing being cut for a different anatomy.
      After her passing, I went through her wardrobe (and that of my daughter, who was no longer living in the house) and tried on numerous items. At some point, a light in my head went on and I realized that I ought to try larger sizes.
      Over the last three to four years, through online shopping following targeted in-person reconnoitring forays through the ladies’ clothing department, I now have a decent (and expanding) collection of dresses, skirts, blouses, ladies’ shoes, ladies’ pants, pantihose, tights, leggings, etc. etc.)
      Finding your right size takes some research (many online shopping websites have sizing/measuring guides) plus a bit of guesswork and sheer trial and error. Only twice or thrice have I been able to muster the courage to try on a woman’s garment in the shop.
      Having now gained some experience in gauging how a woman’s garment will fit my body, I am able to run my eye (and sometimes hand) over a woman’s garment in the shop and estimate with reasonable accuracy whether it will be a comfortable fit and happily I have progressed towards becoming a developing judge of whether certain colours and patterns would suit me.
      Love,
      Katherine

    • #404782

      I did it for AGES. We can wear many of the same clothes, I mean she’s got female hips and I’ve got male shoulders, but most everything else is comparable.

      As I write this I am wearing a pair of her tights and pumps. We do have different styles and tastes though.

      As far as without her knowing……all those years I thought I was so clever, turns out she suspected for years anyways. You may be in the same boat, just saying.

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