Hi everyone! I wanted to share something that happened to me a couple of months ago. First, let me briefly give you some history.
I began thinking about crossdressing around the age of 13. I noticed that women had so many products made for them to look pretty, look sexy, smell good, and age with beauty and grace. Then I looked at what men had. There was not really much that I could think of to help men in these areas. Sure there was cologne and nice clothes but I didn’t like suits. Most of the colognes I had tried, in my opinion, did not smell very good on me. Also, men were just supposed to age and do the best they could.
Due to society and being raised in the church, I put the thoughts of crossdressing out of my mind for several years, until I was about 23. I was at home alone and decided to dress in some of my wife’s clothes and put on some makeup. I didn’t look too bad for my first attempt. I thought to myself what a pretty girl I would have been.
Fast forward to my current wife. She sends me mixed signals. She may bring home some clothes or makeup for me that she picked up while she was out and be, for all appearances, very supportive and accepting. At last! Then, not a week later, she tells me that I look like an old used up barfly trying to look young. This is very hurtful and discouraging.
So, on the occasions that I do get to go to the grocery store or run some public errands en femme, I have to muster up my self-confidence, hope that I look good enough, and appear natural enough.
It is such a huge confidence booster when a cashier or somebody will use “ma’am” when addressing me. I feel like I have achieved what I wanted to, and I feel good about myself.
However, until a couple of months ago, I had never experienced what I did that night or perhaps I just didn’t notice.
It was one of the nights that I was feeling confident (with me, that feeling of confidence has its own ebb and flow). I was wearing a black, somewhat see-through top with a black top underneath, a pair of blue skinny jeans, and 3 1/2 inch heels. I thought I looked like one of the women I see at the store and think, “She is a trophy wife”. We needed some items from the store, so out I went. As I was in the checkout line at the grocery store, a man who was in line behind me (he appeared to have had a rough life) started to chat with me. The small talk started to lengthen until he was asking how long I have lived here, etc. I soon realized he was flirting with me!! OMG!!! Talk about a confidence booster! I felt I was ready to conquer the world at that point and it felt great, weird, and awkward all at the same time! As I was going out to the car, I wondered what the other people around us were thinking. Did anybody “out” me to him (if any of them even knew)? I put my items in the car and as I was getting in, I saw him in the parking lot. He was looking at me and I flashed him a little smile and waved. He said for me to have a good night and we each went on with our night. I sat for a few seconds reflecting on the event that just took place. WOW! I have no clue if he suspected I was a crossdresser, if he knew and liked crossdressers, or anything else. But, it actually felt good with being flirted.
So, that was my experience in realizing a guy at the store was flirting with me and my confidence was soaring!
I still fight the war at home. I am fearful that I may end up having to choose between Mirandah and my wife. I don’t want to be put there.
Perhaps my path will cross this man’s path again someday. If so, I will let you know.
Thank you for allowing me to share this, and I hope it can encourage and inspire somebody.
Tags: confidence crossdressing in public passing as a woman