I have been thinking about writing an article for some time now but going back and forth about a subject. I guess during these troubling times of a pandemic and self- isolation and self-reflection, the topic now seems appropriate.
Like other girls I started my fascination with cross dressing at an early age. I would wear my older sister’s clothes and dream about being a girl. I was almost found out by my father and was petrified with fear but actually exposed myself to my sister while wearing some of her clothes. She was taken back by my appearance, and that was not the response I was hoping for so I played it off as a joke. That turned me off for quite some time. I was in my early teens and I put my fantasy out of my mind. I felt I was the only person who did such a thing. High school, college and the service followed and my embarrassment and fascination with dressing disappeared. Along with marriage, children, buying and taking care of a house, a 40-hour work week and even a part time job to make ends meet. I was too busy and poor to think about dressing, let alone buy feminine clothes.
As a health care professional, I worked nights so with my wife at work and my children at school, I was home alone and my availability and desire to dress increased. I accumulated some things when I had the courage to go shopping and started purchasing things online. Of course, I couldn’t have them delivered to my house, so I obtained a P.O. box. I stored them in large plastic bins in my garage and crawl space, always afraid someone would find them. When I wasn’t exhausted from work I would bring some items in the house and enjoy being Jenna even for a short time. Guilt would set in and on some of my feminine things mold grew and I took that as a sign to purge my items. Of course, I missed dressing, and would purchase other things from time to time. Life went on, my kids grew up, they got married and we now have grandchildren and within the last few years. Both my wife and I retired!
I know this is a story that is most likely a carbon copy of many girls here, however, this is where my story has a twist that I haven’t read from others on this site. I am bisexual! My wife does not know of my desire to cross dress and in addition have an attraction to men when I’m dressed as Jenna. I know a lot of you would say I should come clean to my wife but I don’t think she would handle this bombshell very well. No matter how I try to curb both my crossdressing and my attraction towards men, I always get drawn back into the dressing, back into that attraction to other men!
Thank You for taking the time to read my story! Hope we all can have an exchange of thoughts and ideas! Please feel free to answer one or more of the questions I’ve posed to you below.
- Have you ever felt the urge to be with a man or even fantasized about being with a man when you are dressed en femme?
- Have you been living in secret like me and can’t bring yourself to come clean with your wife or significant other?
- Did you totally lose the desire to cross dress after getting married, working a full-time job, raising children, and just not seeming to have the time to cross dress during that particular time of your life?
Hugs to you all! Jenna
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Jenna Stone
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Hi Jenna you are right there hon, your life is a carbon copy of mine although I never outed myself to any family members and I have been caught by my wife once while dressed. The results of that are an entire article unto themselves. To answer your question I dont consider myself bisexual but that is in the label only as when I am dressed and being Gail I do think quite often about sexual attraction to other men. When I am not being Gail I find that I have no sexual attraction towards men. I dont think there… Read more »
Gail. Thanks for your reply and sorry it took so long to respond to you. Bisexual is a label just like Any other classification we want to give ourselves. I think there are more men out there that are attracted to CD’s then you think. Many are but don’t want to be labelled a homosexual, there We go with the stereotypes and naming again. It’s part of our society and something we have to live with. Maybe you would change your mind about traveling down that road if you met the right guy. Whatsoever road you take, enjoy the journey… Read more »
Hi thanks Jenna, you are probably right there may be a few more men that are attracted to us gals but dont want the label that comes with acting on that attraction. I have been out a few times and when I have been out have had the opportunity to chat to a few men on occasions but never had the offer to go any further. I think with the right person and a few champas under the skirt I may take it to its natural end but its the afterwards that is my main concern as it is as… Read more »
Gail. You never know what is around the corner of life. I have talked to a few girls here and I truly believe Mr Right is out there for me. I have to keep the faith because it is something that keeps all of us going in our lives. Looking forward to chatting with you soon. It doesn’t have to be like a couple of teenage girl but that would be wonderful too. Love you! Hugs Jenna ❤
Hey Jenna, I laughed to myself hon its been a long long long time since I have thought of myself as a teenage girl but it is one thing that I do miss having had the opportunity to sit around in a nightie talking about boys and giggling. I love the optimism hon it really sits well with me being the glass half full gal I am and I agree I think there is a Mr right out there for us just have to be in the right spot and at the right time to be able to get an… Read more »
Hi Jenna my name is kristielynn n I have been dressing up in sexy lingerie and sexy dresses stockings and heels .. I have been having the same urges or fantasy to be with a man.. like when I am dressed up in lingerie I wanna enjoy watching porn and I imagine I am the lady who is being treated like a slut
Hi Jenna,
I’m new here and just found your post. Thank you for that. I feel pretty much the exact way you do. It’s so nice to know I am not alone. Wow can I relate!
Evy
I just noticed your post and I am so sorry for not replying! I’ve also been having trouble signing in to my account but that is not an excuse. Please forgive me! Hugs Jenna ❤
Kristielynn! I am so sorry about not responding to your post until now, I am so sorry! I’ve done the same thing you talked about and I bet a lot of girls on CD do the same but won’t admit it. Again I’m so sorry, please forgive me! Hugs Jenna