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I'm a crossdresser, and have been most of my life, in one form or another. Now, as I'm older and a widower, I can make up for all those times I missed. I now dress freely around the house. I'm learning to use make-up and generally all those things that I've missed out on. I'm having some success, however, I realize that I'll never pass as a woman. For me, that’s no big deal, I just enjoy being myself.
I recently made friends with a young transitioning woman and her wife, and had a couple nice visits. They invited me to a local club that is open to everyone regardless of how you present. The club hosts a weekly drag show with local and regional talent. I decided to go this past week completely dressed for the first time. I spent most of the early evening getting ready by choosing my outfit, checking to see my wig was just right, and then getting dressed. I decided to go casual in jeans, a black t-shirt top that is trimmed in gold thread, and my new two-inch heel pumps. Once I was dressed, I even took the time to paint my nails a nice bright red.
Once all together I headed for the club. I was excited about being out and not at all nervous. I was even able to drive in my heels.
I arrived at the club about a half hour before the show was to start. I ordered a drink and found an empty table near the floor. A couple people said hi but didn't start a conversation.
The show started and the first couple performers were very good. I started to get onto the spirit of things really enjoying myself.
After a bit and not wanting lot of alcohol in me, I got a bottle of water in between acts. One of the performers was there waiting to go on and I struck up a conversation with her. I told her that she really looked great and she said I did too. I told her this was my first time out as Ragina and she congratulated me and gave me a big hug.
After each performer did their number, they got to choose a person from the crowd to have a drink with them. When the dancer I was talking to finished her dance, she walked over to me, took me by the hand, and led me to the floor in front of the crowd. She introduced me and told everyone that this was my first time out. Everyone cheered and I even took a bow just for the fun of it. Then we went to get our drink and I got another hug. I can say I never felt more alive than I did that night!
After my introduction to the audience, I was now the new girl who everyone wanted to talk to. I got a chance to make a few new friends and talked to many more. I stayed for the second show not wanting the night to be over so quickly.
All too soon, however, it was over. I stayed around a bit longer talking to new friends as well as more of the performers. I thanked them all for making my first time out so special. I drove home riding on a cloud of joy promising myself to make this a regular part of my life going forward.
Thank you girls for taking the time to read my article and I hope your first time out in a public setting like this club I went to was as exciting as my first time out in public!
Sincerely, Ragina
Oh, Regina, what a heavenly night! I've been going out about once a month with a local group on Meetup. If not for them, I don't know when I would have gone out. But you, girl, going out solo! That is so brave. I can't believe you had a chance to be on stage and everybody wanted to support and greet you!!
Thanks for sharing such a warm and fun story!
Hugs,
Brielle
Thank you for all the compliments, Brielle. I've been back several times since, and now I'm just one of the regulars. Friends there always stop to say hi, even some of the performers have become close friends, and invite me to other places where they're going to be through the week. I'm just enjoying the good feelings. Hugs, Ragina
Regina, so happy for you! I can understand your feelings from a special nite out. Isn't it such a "feel alive" moment when accepted by a group of former strangers who now feel like new friends? Wish you continued good times out and about in the future and enjoy your female persona and the experiences they bring your way
Hugs,
Marian
Wonderful, Regina - congratulations on your success stepping out into the world!
how thrilling for you Regina and it was your first night out alone. Sure you wont forget this night and trips out after this will be so easy now.
I've been back several times, and it never gets old. This first time was not filled with fear as some stories I've read here. I guess it was more the excitement of actually going. I was a bit nervous driving there, more of being stopped, so I just played it safe and paid close attention to what I was doing so as not to draw attention. Thank you for the comment. Ragina
What a night that must have been! I could feel your excitement as I read through it, and it was great to have such a wonderful first time out.
Thanks for sharing it with us, and I wish you so many more happy times out en femme.
Amy
Regina, I am so happy for you. I will never forget my first time out. I was so scared. It was in Palm Springs which is very friendly for LGBT people. I was treated just like any woman at the restaurant I went to.To top it off I actually had a nice looking guy offer to buy me a drink. I politely declined. Take care.
Hugs,
Steph
congratulations on your first night out, meeting new friends and having a great time being the woman you should have been. glade you came out and had a great time. wish i could do the same. wife knows i dress up, but only in doors and when our adult child is at work is when i dress up. wife has seen me dressed up and seems to not care anymore, but still will not let me sit in same room with her and watch T.V and talk like 2 woman. but i do under dress and feel happy relaxed, depressed free no panic attacks, stress free. being the women i should have been
Hi Regina
Your first evening out sounds so wonderful and to be able to make new friends must have been very special. It’s certainly different to my first time out (which was actually this evening) I just went out to a local department store and bought myself a few girly things. It was such a special and wonderful experience.
It just goes to show, it’s not where you go that matters it’s that act of going out that counts.
Thank you for sharing your wonderful story with us.
love Stephanie ❤️
I agree, Stephanie. Just being out is such a rush, and then to be so well accepted was the icing on the cake. Keep taking the small steps, and soon it'll be second nature. Thanks for the comment, it means a lot. Hugs, Ragina
Wow, good for you, it must have been very exciting for you as well as a super boost for your feminine persona.
What a great story and thank you for sharing your “first night out” so glad Regina had a good time…. It’s an inspiration for Leonara to experience for the first time for some nitelife..
hugs, Leonara
Thank you for the comments Leonara. Yes, it was a wonderful experience and I do continue to go regularly. As far as going out, I just decided that it was time. The opportunity presented itself and I just went. Thats what I suggest to you, just go for it. Most people are too wrapped up in their own life to even look up from their phone and see the wonderful things around them. Go for it and then be sure to give the rest of us the thrill of experiencing it through your eyes. Hugs, Ragina
Thank you Regina for your comments and especially words of encouragement… and I am sure it’s true..”most people are too wrapped up in their own life”. Leonara is curious to find it out for herself!
hugs, Leonara
My first time out was only noteworthy because it was my first time! My close female friend had a hard time accepting me as Haley, and I could tell she was not comfortable…and was judging me. Other trips out have been fun, going to Target, Panera for coffee, and going out clubbing in downtown St Pete with my girlfriend Special K was a blast! I love the LGBTQ community and never felt as accepted and welcomed as I did that night!
Hi Haley Anne and thank you for the kind comments. Just wanted to say that I think you look fantastic and you and your friend seem to be having fun. I agree that the LGBTQ community is much more accepting of crossdressers as a group. Some hardliners don't feel that we are truly part of LGBTQ culture, but as a rule, most are very welcoming to us. Enjoy being who you are, be bold and confident, and most of all, have a blast. Hugs to you, Ragina
Ragina, that was a really uplifting story and it sounds like you were the life of the bar that evening. I am sure your new found freedom is as equally exciting. I am not quite there yet and maybe that is the sort of place I should start. My wife is very encouraging so I know I would have a great wing girl but I know I will never be able to pass and I don't want to be just a guy in a dress. I feel more and more compelled to go out enfemme and skate the edge everyday. Anyway, thank you for your story and hopefully someday I can tell you about my first time out.
Have a wonderful weekend
Dani
Thank you for the nice comments, Danika, and I agree that the type of club i went to is a great starting point, simply because no one really worries about it. There are several strait couples as well as singles that show up at our club and they are just as welcome as anyone else. I'm a lot like you seem to be, not really able to pass all that well, but there it doesn't matter. Everyone is there to be who they are, and its all one grand family. Thanks again for the comments. Hugs, Ragina
Thank you Ragina for posting your story. I actually teared up reading it. I know you have helped a lot of other girls by telling your story. I first went out over 40 years ago. I remember it like it was yesterday. I am so glad you had such a great time.
Huggs Terri
Terri, thanks for the kind comments and I take it as a compliment that you became so emotional over the story. I still get so happy remembering that night. Even now, when I go back to the club people are happy to see me. I get hugs and compliments on how I look. I told some friends thereabouts the story here and they took the time to read it and was texted back how proud they are of me and how happy it made them that they were a part of that night for me. Its kind of overwhelming. Thanks again for the kind words. Ragina
Hi Ragina. Wonderful and inspiring story. So happy to read of your acceptance and thrill filled night. We all should be so lucky to have an experience like that. I've been out in public but was not even close to your debut. Thanks for sharing with us girls.
Awesome story! So uplifting and relatable too. I imagine my first time on a proper outing to be something just like that. Gives one hope!!! Kisses,
Brooke
