My story is like so many other ladies. I started feeling the urge to dress at an early age. I found myself first touching and then trying on my mother and sister’s clothes. I usually felt shame, because as a child of the 60’s, this kind of behavior was taboo. I knew I wasn’t gay, but I had the overwhelming urge to dress like a lady.
I found myself obsessed with women’s clothing and underwear. Through college, I would only sneak and wear a pair of panties and hose in private. This continued for years until I married a wonderful, but somewhat prudish lady. I never revealed my secret, but one day she found my hidden stash of panties, hose, and shoes.
That was the beginning of the end for our marriage. I went on to met an amazing woman that was open-minded and very sexual. After a few years, I confided in her that I thought it would feel good to wear ladies panties; she was open to this. I should have realized then that she would be open to my crossdressing desires, but I was still afraid to tell her.
Over the next few years, I began to talk and hint more about my desires, but I never came out completely and honestly. This went on for many years until my desires began to overwhelm me. Out of the blue one day, I told my wife that one of my fantasies was to dress up as a woman and go out to our favorite bar together. She immediately agreed, saying it would be fun. She suggested that we start getting my outfit and wig together.
Wow, was I shocked. My amazing wife never blinked! At this point, I began to share my true desires with her. My wife’s only concern was whether I wanted to go all the way and become a woman. I explained that I had no intentions of a full transition; I just have a feminine side that needs to come out sometimes. She laughed and commented, “Great, now I have a girlfriend to go shopping with!”
She immediately began to help me buy a small wardrobe, wig, shoes and makeup. We had so much fun shopping together. After a few weeks of preparation, it was time for Michelle to make her appearance. I’m a huge pro wrestling fan, and I’d bought tickets to an event in a nearby city. My wife helped with my outfit, makeup, and even worked with me on walking and my female mannerisms. She then proudly walked by Michelle’s side into the arena.
I can’t begin to describe the feelings inside me. I felt such joy and freedom to finally express my feminine side. We talked and giggled like two girls and had a blast. Yes I got a lot of weird looks, whispers, and finger pointing, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t about being pretty or sexy; it was about me being me.
Since then, Kay has continued looking for new clothes and accessories for me and constantly reminds me of ways to be more feminine. I dress up, and we go out to restaurants and go shopping. We are now planning a weekend getaway to Atlanta; I will take no male clothing and be Michelle for 3 full days. We are planning to go shopping and see a drag queen show. I know I’m lucky. I have an amazing wife who understands and supports my desires. We even have matching nightgowns!
My advice to those ladies who haven’t gone out in public….just do it. It isn’t about what others think or say, it’s about you and your desires. Be strong, and be the lady that you are!