John 15 1, 7-8: (Jesus said): I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinegrower.7. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask for whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit and become my disciples.”
(Vanessa had asked that I divide this inspiration into two pieces for ease of reading and thinking on. This is the continuation of the inspiration that started with the story of the Eunuch in Acts. To recap, both of these lessons, the story of the Eunuchin Acts, and the parable of the vine and the vinegrower were read in church on Mother’s Day and were the source for the entire Inspiration.-Vicki)
It seems appropriate then that the image of the vine that Jesus uses in the Gospel followed the lesson of this hungering soul, the eunuch of Acts. Jesus compares himself to a vine, and the Father to the vinegrower. He compares us to offshoots from that vine, and that those who bear fruit, are cared for, pruned and allowed to flourish under the Father’s care and constantly fed by the main vine which is Christ. We cannot live or exist in Christ apart from his sustenance. “Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, but apart from me you can do nothing.” I listened to the verse, understanding again the lesson that in Christ lays the answers we all look for and yet hearing these words as if for the first time and with new understanding. The minister in his sermon used many present day examples to drive the point home, and then asked this question, attempting to tie the two stories together. He allowed that angels, still work in this world, though we probably shouldn’t expect magnificent winged creatures blazing with light to guide us. But, he said, be attentive to the little things and then look inside to test it. He pointed more than once to an area on his torso, between the heart and stomach and peered at the congregation, how do we know it is the Spirit he asked, tapping that region on him self. He didn’t need to provide the answer, for we know where God resides. It is there in our heart that we find not only God abiding in us, but us abiding in God. The lesson was very clear, but my hungering Spirit wanted more.
When one goes out on a journey that might be on a path that would seem new; perhaps by the “experts” of our day to be…forbidden; one wants to be sure that their chosen path is correct. I want to believe that this ministry call I feel so strongly is true. I found myself as the Pastor tapped his heart wanting to shout out, how can we know and trust that “gut” feeling. I am a seeker filled with too many doubts at times, still wanting to believe that it doesn’t matter what I choose to wear, or who I find fulfillment in love with, or even that the body I was given does not match the person that I am. I want to believe that God is not judging us on that. Still the path I am on, the people I seek to reach out to and be reached back to by, are seen by so many as unworthy of God’s love and acceptance. I know many in this community struggle daily with this side of themselves and reject God, because they feel God has rejected them. So I wonder if I might just be wrong and that “they” are right. I formulate the words and want to ask, How can I be sure this is God and not my own selfishness, or my own agenda. It seems even as the words are hanging in the air, “those who abide in me” I am forgetting them. Even as the pastor taps his chest, I am questioning my own heart.
Yet, the words stay, the words hang until they can penetrate and take root. I let go of the doubt, look to Jesus, and allow myself to abide in Him, and the fruit begins to flourish. I give up my own agenda, I allow the vinegrower to prune as necessary, and wait for the fruit to appear. God is wise enough to know, if I saw the perils of the journey, I would likely just stay at home. If we knew what lay ahead, joys and sorrow, trials and triumphs, most of us would likely just decide it wasn’t worth it, and choose to live the way we are expected to. But He provides us with the assurance we need. The fruits of our labors would be proof enough. In these first weeks, I’ve found so many of you willing to share your thoughts back to me, to encourage me in small yet important ways. I hesitate to use the term, loaded in our present day world with such negative connotation for people like us. But there it is, you are my fruits, the assurance that Jesus abides in me, and that I am finally beginning to abide in Him. Maybe better to say, you all are my angels, visiting me and pointing me to new paths, all the while giving me that sense of peace that I am on the right path for me. I give thanks to you and I give thanks to God for you all dear readers, and will stay on this path, even though doubt assails me at times. I will strive to remember in Him, we have our strength and purpose and it is in Him only we need seek approval.
I have your rss feed on my destop sidebar, but this trend to religion stories on your site is very disturbing. All religion is a terrible scam perpetrated on the people of the world, and I find this offensive. Especially so, since the christian religion finds crossdressing, along with any other type of different sexual expression to be abhorrent. I am baffled as to why you would support a group of people who, by and large, find you to be anathema. I will be removing your feed from my sidebar, and I will not be frequenting this site any more.
Hi Ray,
I’m sorry to hear you’re leaving us. The posts about Christianity and crossdressing are not meant to offend anyone, but to share the love and hope of Jesus withall his children. Reconciling a deeply held belief with one’s true inner nature as a crossdresser causes stress and dissonance for many in the transgender community. I think it’s important to share an alternate Christian point of view – the love of Jesus encompasses everyone, and doesn’t have a requirement on race or gender or sexual preference. Those who would say otherwise deny the purpose of His message.
But in a sense I agree with you. You are quite correct that religion is a scam, and far worse. It has been the cause of war, and hate and suffering. I believe it is the greatest threat to scientific progress, human rights and genuine love. The paradox is, if the religions of the world practiced half of what their founders preached we would think of them differently. I think Jesus hangs His head in shame at what His ‘followers’ do in His name. At the intolerance and hate the world has been burdened with because of religion.
I think now I understand what Jesus was speaking out against when He condemned the actions of the Pharisees. Perhaps the Christians are the 21st century Pharisees?
Ray, I must emphatically say that I do not support a group of people (‘the church’, ‘Christians’, …). Rather, I have a deep belief in the love and salvation that Jesus Christ brings us. Of the power of the love and tolerance He preached to transform the world. I believe every person is a beautiful creation. Yes, even Christians ()
I agree with your message all the way. Is too bad Ray felt that way. But he’s following the pharisee and saducee of our modern age and that’s why he’s so disappointed and that’s his fault not yours. I follow Jesus, not people.
Susan
Hi Vanessa, I wanted to get in on this comment. As a Christian and a crossdresser, I have to agree that religion in general can be a scam. Look at some of these mega-churches that are popping up these days with thier multi-million dollar edificesdesigned to”reach the masses with the Gospel’. Come on now! How in the world can they ever reach the masses when there is all the budgetary expences to meet every month, not to mention the staff it takes to maintain these facilities. And, of course, there’s the pastors salary. You get the picture. Couldn’t there be a better use of all the cash that comes through the door. I love the small community church that we belong to. Everyone knows everyone and loves his fellow man, wherever he or she may be in thier walk. Denominationalism is the bane of true Christianity. I call myself a Christian who chooses to worship in the Episcopal (Anglican, for all our readers in the UK). I love it and wouldn’t change it. Perfect? Not by a long shot. But we love our brothers and that’s what it all boils down to. Love all, Ragina
Dear Ragina,
We’re not even supposed to call other people rabbis or fathers or pastors or ministers. We are supposed to be all brothers and let those names to the only True One, Jesus. I am happy that you found a true church to go to. I have been to a few of them and I finally gave up on them for been wrong, not on Jesus who’s right. Remember that Jesus at the final step will send a lot of those so called Christians to hell by saying and I paraphrase; You’ve never been in my ways. To bad for them, I feel sorry, but they made their bed.
Susan
I cannot find in your writing how it is ok with God to cross dress, even for humor which I like if ok. How do you mesh this type of dressing with the Bible? I’ve been searching the Web for answers for long and some don’t reply after one e-mail that they send. It seems that its too much for them to care that I find humor in dressing this way-lets say if its ok. So, any ways, how do you mesh cross dressing and the Bible-can the Bible be used rightly to verify its ok? Thanks.