This past November, I began my CD journey. I’ve worn undergarments and lingerie on and off for years in secret but realized I didn’t want to suppress my femme identity any longer. I started buying clothes and dressing in secret as much as I could. Never fully dressed because I rarely had the time nor the ability to do makeup or nails. I still wanted to put on my clothes and experience that femme feeling as much as possible.
I didn’t tell my wife, not because I was afraid of her reaction, but because I wasn’t totally sure what was actually going on with me. I had tons of questions and new and unknown feelings. How could I come out to her, let alone answer questions I was sure she would ask? I didn’t know the answers myself. Well, recently I did come out to her. I’m not sure that it could have gone any better!!! After I summoned the courage and told her I was a crossdresser, she said, “Yeah, I know. You’ve enjoyed putting on my underwear and nightgowns for years.” And I said, “Yes, that’s true, but I have my own wardrobe, dozens of pairs of panties, bras, skirts, dresses, breast forms, heels, and pretty much everything but a wig.”
Her response was, “That’s awesome!” I am not surprised by this, as she is very open-minded and has been very supportive of the LGBTQ community for years. She had questions, but I felt more confident in being able to answer. Mostly she was happy for me, she wanted to see all my clothes, and she was genuinely excited for me and happy that I shared it with her.
She went into her closet and pulled out some things she didn’t wear, asking if I wanted to try them on. She gave me two tops, a pair of leggings, and a really nice dress that she commented looked really good on me. We talked for hours, and it was amazing. She is completely accepting and genuinely wants to be involved with Bethann as much as I wish her to be. She offered to help me do makeup but also encouraged me to go get a makeover and gather tips and makeup help from a professional.
She’s excited to help pick out clothes and accessories. I’m overwhelmed at how well this has transpired. We also talked about some of the deeper topics. Such as, what does it mean about my sexuality? And did I think about pursuing HRT or even going beyond to possibly transitioning? If I did, she would be okay with it and be 100% supportive, still wanting to remain my spouse. It was an amazing conversation.
Right now, I’m so happy. I’m not sure how to express it. I thought a few weeks ago when I went out in public dressed for the first time was an amazing day. This might have been even better. I am so excited to see what the future brings.
How best to put into words what being a part of the CDH family has meant to me over the last month. It’s because of all the wonderful girls here and their support! It’s not only with what I received but in all that I’ve noticed given to everyone else, that I have been able to progress on this journey! To everyone here at CDH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
I am so looking forward to continuing my journey and remaining a part of this amazing family!
wow so happy for you that your wife is so open to your cross dressing and is giving you some of her dresses and would like you to get a makeover. plus helping you with make-up. now you both can go shopping for each other and have a nice day shopping. Enjoy the world of cross dressing and glade your wife is supportive of the LGBTQ community God bless her
My experience is similar. I’ve been interested in cross dressing for years. I eased my way in to telling my wife in November of 2021. I was totally amazed at her understanding and acceptance. I attribute this to the fact her brother is gay, though not femme. I have assured her that I am not “turning gay" and not planning on any transition. Like your wife, mine is fully supportive. She also had me try on several of her clothing items. We are similar in size so we can swap out some things. She has taught me how to apply… Read more »
You hit the spousal jackpot! Best wishes to you and your spouse for your future happiness.
Thats awesome Bethanne, for both of you!
What a wonderful story and above all your wife accepting your CD revelation
now opens up a new dimension in your relationship… so happy for you… a little advice don’t move too fast… for me it was fine in the beginning but my wife had second thoughts as she processed my CD…
Thanks Leonara,
My wife has been the one moving fast the last few weeks. She has asked me a few times about why I’m not being Bethann more and has urged me to dress to go out with her for coffee or shopping. She enjoys going out with Bethann. It’s been awesome.
I am so happy for you.. you have great support give her an extra hug..
I’m so happy for you that things have worked out this way. I recently came out to my wife because I could no longer hide who I am. She says she understands and we have talked about it for hours, but she says she isn’t ready to have “another lady in the house" and wants me to find another plave to stay or live, at least for the time being. She has also given me several nice tops and jackets along with makeup tips. She says that if I am going to be transgendered and not just a crossdresser that… Read more »
That is so great Bethann! I’m really happy for you! I hope one day my wife will be that happy, and supportive.
It’s the most and best feeling in the world to come clean. Your a fortunate person for so many others end marriages, separate from family and friends and many other negative outcomes. I have seen it and it can be pretty hairy at times. So good luck on your journey and may the cross dressing god’s watch over and influence your mission.
Congrats Bethann!! Coming out to your SO can be one of the hardest things to do. I can agree that CDH has been the best thing on my journey too. I am nearing the point where I want to try being out to all and presenting as female 24/7. I think I can set the ball rolling on this, this week. I do want to be careful not to move to fast as my next theropy session is a week and a half away. For my my theropy is largely so I don’t move to fast or incorrectly, not thinking… Read more »
Thank you Cassie. I am happy for you for having the courage to take that step towards presenting 24/7. Taking it slow is probably the right thing. As you said , to have time to consider all possibilities. But I understand the desire to just do it now. When it does happen it will be the right time and I am confident it will be wonderful for you. You are a beautiful woman and you need to show that to the world.
Thank you so much Bethann. The logistics to tell certain people and groups and fear of the possible ‘blow back’ makes me want to crawl into a hole one minute then the next want to just do it. looks like I have a opportunity to tell one daughter this afternoon that I want/ need to go full time. I am both scared and excited at the same time.
Wow, Bethann, this is exactly the same thing that happened when I told my wife … and then I woke up! Ha ha!
But seriously, I’m extremely happy for you! Like many here, my needs to present as a woman have grown over the last five to ten years and yet, I remain in the closet around my otherwise perfect, loving wife. Hugs and kisses to your beautiful wife. Cheers to a perfect outcome and I wish you many happy years together.
Much love,
Raquel
Oh, and, this is what makes being a member of CDH a joy for me. I love hearing stories like yours.