Finding Your Way

Oh what a great read April, I think a lot of us older girls here fell the same, If only i come to terms much earlier in life to what and how I could off become whom I was meant to be, Instead I just sat on my hands as they say
Life is to short to keep wondering what could happen and I now believe you need to just go for it

April what a beautiful and well put article. I feel that I am on a very similar journey. And now at the age of 61 I find myself with the time and opportunity to re-explore who I am and who I want to be. I love being Holly, I feel so much more relaxed, content, and alive when I'm her. But how far do I go, or how far should I go? This I have yet to discover.
I know that I will never pass as a woman, it is just the reality of things. No matter how hard I try I know that I will never pass. So the question to myself is, what am I willing to accept? This is what I have to find and answer for myself. I believe when I find that answer I will be able to be happy and content with who I am. Being happy and content with yourself is what is important. Life is too short and honestly it is getting shorter.
April, I admire you and all the other girls who have stepped out into the world. I truly hope you find what you are looking for.
Hugs and kisses,
Holly

Great Article April,
You have put into words what so many of us older girls (I'm 64) feel.
Not unhappy but not fully satisfied.
Hugs
Jillian

What a beautiful story Apri. I'm the same as you. Isn't life such a conflict? I'm happy being male but I feel so comfortable when I'm dressed. Lizzie.

Such a lovely & beautiful read , your words convey your emotions

I know we all start at the same post. But I think you have a head start over most of us. For i think you are a beautiful sexy lady now. Where most of us it will take months if not years ( if at all ) to look as good as you. So I say Go for it girl. Grab it with both hands and run with it you won’t be disappointed x Amanda

Wonderful post April, thank you so much for posting it! I feel your conflict. It's a struggle to balance what we want, feel, and the risk. I don't want to have to trade anything I like, but finding a permanent place for my feminine side feels so risky and full of losing and gaining.

If only it was all as simple as changing hair style. At first, the new look is a shock, but quickly it's accepted and everyone moves on.

God bless you, and best of luck, stay beautiful, I understand your story!

Thanks for sharing your heartfelt story! Life has its seasons, and it seem like the femme season for many of us is in later adulthood, after the kids are out of the house and perhaps also when we are in or nearing retirement. I fully expect I will dress more frequently in a few years when I retire. I could imagine living as a woman much more of the time (few days at a stretch perhaps), but I think I'd still switch to guy mode for half the time. But it's hard to say what balance will feel right in a few years as we are all seeking balance within our current selves. Have a wonderful new year and stay beautiful!

Thanks for sharing April. I think so many of us feel the same way.

Hugs....

What are your wife’s thoughts on you transitioning? My wife tolerates Glory but cringes at the thought of intimacy with her ‍♂️. That’s fair though as I would fell the same if she was dressed like a man she has no lesbian feelings (how easy would that make it). I guess it depends on where a persons relationship sits and if there is any sex or love left in the relationship and if they are open to being just friends or an open relationship. It’s hard because we build such bonds over such a long time with both our partners and our hidden identities something must give. After a devastating fire there is new growth it’s just the fire is so frightening.

April,
Your story touches a chord with many of us here. Like you, I could never pass as a GG if someone took a real look; I'm far too old to consider any medical procedures; and I don't want to lose my family. Yet, I think daily about how nice it would be to be Bettylou full-time.
You shouldn't call yourself a pretender, because you ARE April, whether or not it shows on the outside. So, take what you have and make the most of it...and be happy with it.
Hugs,
Bettylou

April, you must follow what your heart desires, one must be two that blends together in life. We can't always look like a model, but must take a leaf from the female gender, and use and highlight what we have to work with.
Those that truly love you as the person you are will travel the road with you,for love will bridge the gender change for they understand beneath the exterior is still the true person they love and loves them.
Happiness is yours to seek, find and enjoy, however you choose to live, that's your right, the road may be littered with those who choose not to follow, but then they are not worth worrying about as their love was not pure.
What you enjoy does not demean you as a person, it's how you conduct yourself in life regardless of how you choose to dress. What values you hold and you have does not change.
True beauty comes from the heart in the formation of love, peace of mind comes from loving being what you want to be regardless of others.
Wish you love peace and contentment.
Amanda

There is no-thing I have found sweeter my dear April, than the absolute inner calm and certainty I have only begun recently, to experience 24/7.

I don't even have words to explain it well yet other than to say I have moved out of fear, and into love.
Today, I love my life...

Namaste' sweet soul; own our beauty, you owe no one an explanation; you are free

Huggles for you April
Char