I have only been going out and about for less than three years. At first, it was nerve-wracking and scary. It wasn’t until I made it safely back into the house that I relaxed and recalled the events of the day. That was then. I have since found inspiration, courage, and confidence. Now, when I go out, I savor the experience. I snap photos of every happening, and I’ve got stories for nearly every adventuresome outing. This one made me laugh so hard it hurt.

This story takes place in Littleton, Colorado. It is early September, and the weather is perfect for an outing. I was ending a wonderful day out, but before returning to the RV, I stopped in at the King Sooper (Kroger) grocery store to pick up a few items. This is the same store where two years ago the checkout cashier hugged me because she recognized me as a crossdresser. Please read about that in Articles / Hodgepodge. search for Close Encounters.

When I make a trip to the grocery store, I go with a shopping list on my phone. Holding the phone is like a security blanket (it gives me something to do with my hands.) Plus, it is something to look at if I suddenly feel uncomfortable. While shopping, I often intentionally walk past an item on my list, just so I can enjoy more exposure. Well, I was finding everything just fine from my list until the Hershey’s syrup. I went up and down every aisle twice but did not find it.

Looking for the store directory, the one hanging from the ceilings identifying the aisle for an item, I saw the restroom sign. I guess it was the power of suggestion, as suddenly I had the urge to use the restroom. You know the sensation you get when you hear trickling water? Yeah, that urge.

EnFemme Style

Without hesitation, I walked into the lady’s room. It was a two-stall restroom. As I sat, I began reviewing the shopping list on my phone. I heard the door open to the other stall. Looking at the floor next to me, I see the worn polish of painted toes on a pair of feet. Next, I hear the person struggling to undo themselves while their feet shuffled back and forth. I see a pair of shorts bunched on the floor.

A moment later, and all at once, there came a gust of wind the likes of which I have not heard since high school farting contests in the showers! OMG the sound that came from that stall! Then another blast! My word…I was utterly shocked! I turned on my camera to snap a photo of myself as a remembrance of this experience. I had to hold my breath and place my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing aloud! It hurt to hold it back… There came a slight groan and release of breath, kind of like when you blow a puff of air. I heard a trickling sound. I heard everything so clearly that it occurred to me the acoustics of the stalls amplify sound. At least I think that is why I heard everything so clearly. I thought gosh, I hope I’m not that evident…Then suddenly it went silent.

By now I have finished, done my paperwork, and exited the stall. After washing my hands, I primped at my hair in the mirror when the woman walks out of the toilet stall. She looked at me and said, “that’s a relief!” Without washing her hands, she walked out of the restroom… Can you imagine my amazement? As I turned to exit, I grabbed a paper towel to grasp the door handle to open the door.

This encounter has changed the way I think about women doing things “ladylike.” I know flatulence is a normal biological process and is something every one of us experiences. I’ve read that the average person releases wind about 5–15 times per day… but who’s counting? For some, it can happen more and be related to an underlying digestive system’s health problem. Something tells me that the lady in the next stall was like the blue bears in the toilet tissue commercial and just enjoying her go time. We all do it…

The takeaway is that we all do it. But beware… the sound is amplified in those ladies’ room stalls, and because of that, I will endeavor to be more “ladylike” or discreet the next time I go.

EnFemme

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Gwyneth
Lady
Active Member
1 year ago

Awesome story! I look at the title and think, “Bad hair day… wigs rolling down the sidewalk… for some guys, a combover alert". What a play on words. Too cute!

Gwyneth
Lady
Active Member
1 year ago
Reply to  June

I’ll bet you are the life of any party! And fun anytime!

Angela Booth
Member
Trusted Member
1 year ago

That did make me laugh too June. There are sayings that women don’t fart, they whisper in their panties. In this case another comes to mind, Women don’t fart they release tension – and girl did she have some tension! I have been using the ladies for many years and I can say that I haven’t heard such a blast but ‘tension’ is often released. ladies will go in pairs and continue the conversation whilst sat in adjacent stalls or talk to their friend who are powdering their noses. Where there are gatherings such as a party groups will go… Read more »

Peggy Sue Williams
Duchess
Famed Member
1 year ago

A well-written article, June! And yes, whenever possible, I use a paper towel to open
the door, although some Krogers have installed the manual “foot opener" in these
parts to allow for touchless opening of the door.

When one enters the ladies room, I find there is always the possibility of a new
unique experience. In your case, I think you exceeded all expectations of a new
experience!

Have fun, I know you will,

Hugs…Peggy Sue

Fiona Black
Baroness
Trusted Member
1 year ago

Funny story especially with the photo of your reaction. I was in the ladies changing room in Kohl’s one day when the woman in the section next to me let out a pretty big one. Luckily I finished & left before the cloud engulfed me. 

Leonara
Ambassador
Trusted Member
1 year ago

June, Hmm what a wonderful play on words.
thank you for sharing such interesting funny experience… my panties are a little wet from laughing so hard..your reference to the blue bears was so “appropo”… love your writing style and sense of humor.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.
Hugs, Leonara

Ginger Snap
Member
Ginger Snap
1 year ago

June
Absolutely hysterical. Who knew that happens in the ladies room. Maybe someone switched signs. Lol

Wanda Ovahear
Lady
Member
1 year ago

I’m reminded of the time I helped a friend cleanup the drive-in movie in town. The graffiti in the ladies room was some of the raunchiest stuff I’d ever seen.

Ginny Gee
Ginny Gee
1 year ago

I’m not sure which is funnier, the article or the photo. Both are just brilliant.

Last edited 1 year ago by Ginny Gee
Ginny Gee
Ginny Gee
1 year ago
Reply to  June

Looking forward to the next post 🙂

Janice
Baroness
Trusted Member
1 year ago

Oh June darling that is too funny. The look on your face is priceless. I think a lot more ladies in these newer generations are losing a lot of the ladylike grace that we were brought up to know. I never heard that from my mother or sister growing up and we lived in a small one bathroom house. Silent but deadly comes to mind, but to just let it rip. They do not care. I see these young girls dress. They will dress hot or attractive when single going out clubbing for an evening with their friends. But I… Read more »

Sherri Remington
Duchess
Trusted Member
1 year ago
Reply to  Janice

Janice, June Cleaver is my role model, I so love that era of style. I think I might go buy a pair of pearl earrings and necklaces to match.

Janice
Baroness
Trusted Member
1 year ago

She was a sweetheart. Used to think back then like don’t women ever wear pants. They all wore dresses. All the girls in grade school came to school in dresses even in the winter. I used to wish I could wear them. Plus the curls, ponytails and pigtails. I used to envy them.

Sherri Remington
Duchess
Trusted Member
1 year ago

June, I love the story. My having a beard keeps me from using the ladies room, although through my many years in business I have had to work in some and they have always been abused more that the men’s room. Glad you took the photo of the moment, as they say a picture is worth a thousand words.

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