Like many of you, I’ve had the urge to dress up in all the fun and exciting clothing that cis women get to enjoy ever since I was a child. Lovely pink dresses, satin ribbons, and the cutesiest hairbands. These were all things I wished that I’d had the chance to experience as a young girl. But more than anything, the one thing I wanted most of all was the chance to experience ballet.

I remember being silently distraught at the fact that as a boy I would never get the chance to dress up as a lovely ballerina and learn the movements to grace the dance floor. I watched with envy as other girls got ready for ballet lessons after school, knowing that I’d never be allowed to join their class (for me, not even as a boy dancer.) As a child, I was found out several times by my parents, and was severely scolded for it enough to know that I needed to hide this side of me. All I could do is admire from a distance and dream that one day I could wear a tutu and become a graceful ballerina.

When I finally allowed myself to explore my femininity more fully, I thought back to that lost opportunity. Then I realized it was not lost at all, and that I could become that vision of grace and beauty! After months in lockdown there appeared one silver lining. I found an opportunity to buy dance clothes and finally learn ballet myself!

I bought all the items needed to become a ballerina: pink ballet tights from Capezio, ballet shoes, a black leotard, and of course a tutu! When the bag full of goodies arrived from DiscountDance.com my heart skipped a beat knowing that finally, after all these years, I would get to live my dream as Michaela, the Prima Ballerina. There was the obligatory preparation – a warm bath and a close shave, makeup, and hair. With great anticipation, I opened the bag like the children opening the presents in the Nutcracker and was so extremely excited to see the dreams laid out on my bed in front of me!

One by one, my ballet dreams took shape: first the pink ballet tights rolling up my legs, then the leotard hugging my figure, and finally that pretty pink tutu that flared out as I put it on. Completing my look with a pair of ballet shoes, I made a point to not look in the mirror until I was ready.

There she was-Michaela, the prima ballerina! My eyes swelled with emotion as I came to realize that even as a fully grown adult childhood dreams can come true! I hope everyone can fully realize their dreams, and that you can live your dreams no matter how old you may think you might be.

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    Michaela Cruz

    I’m just a budding woman living in the Seattle Area. Looking for groups of ladies willing to help me on my feminine journey.

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    Trina Girl
    Member
    7 months ago

    Oh Michaela,,,,I had the same dream as a child,,would look at pictures of ballerinas and soo wish I too could dance…Envy filled me watching girls after school get ready for dance class,,,wow,,,now I am following your lead! Thank you for the wonderful story!

    Trina Girl
    Member
    7 months ago
    Reply to  Trina Girl

    My dream is starting to come true,,,found a lovely pair of Capizio pointe shoes,,,pale pink,,and a gg friend knows of an instructor!! Thank you Michela, for replanting my dream,,

    Camryn Occasionnel
    Duchess
    Active Member
    7 months ago

    Well, I am impressed, Michaela!  I’ve always been a great admirer of the ballet.  My ex-wife was a ballet instructress and ran her own studio for decades.  I never missed a Nutcracker or a recital. But I confess I never had the dream of actually dancing the ballet, not even in the male roles let alone as a ballerina! This is taking CDing to a new level of specificity. You’ve got “ballerina calves,” I’ll say that, and a fair Fourth Position, too (is that Fourth Position, or am I forgetting my basic Five?).  Next thing is to get yourself a pretty new pair of pointe shoes,… Read more »

    Lea
    Active Member
    6 months ago

    Cute story Michaela! At least you’ve created a wonderful experience and memory of life during the lockdown.

    Great look, you have that ballerina poise!

    Peggy Sue Williams
    Duchess
    Noble Member
    6 months ago

    Yes, being a ballerina is a CD experience which has meaning for many of us. Cheerleader, ballerina, bride, maternity outfit, bridesmaid, etc. These images just emit so much femininity that I guess for many CDs, self included, they overload our brain with the Pink Fog. Michaela, by all means, chase your dream! I told my ballerina story a few times here on CDH, so I won’t go into much detail. I got to be a ballerina only one time in my life, at age 10, in a cub scout play, For one month, every Friday & Saturday night we were… Read more »

    Deborah Nicole
    Member
    6 months ago

    I am so happy you have lived your dream – well done – and your outfit is very pretty.

    Natasha Krober
    Member
    6 months ago

    Hello Michaela. I am so so happy to read this hun. I have tears for you. To be who you always wanted to be. Hidden all this time. Finally, you are free. Your soul set free and full of joy. I am so happy for you. You look beautiful hun. Please dont loose that freed soul. Cherish it. Hugs Natasha

    Natasha Krober
    Member
    6 months ago
    Reply to  Michaela Cruz

    Hello Michaela. Your so welcome sweetie. I hope you get to dance your heart out hun. Your soul deserves it. Hugs, Natasha

    helenmarie
    Member
    6 months ago

    Hello Michaela, You do look lovely in your ballet outfit, & I am pleased that your dream has come true. I also like to wear a ballet outfit, & have a pink leotard with a tutu fitted on, worn with white tights & shoes. It was never a dream of mine as a child, but I do like what I call girly [ballet/princess] clothes. So keep wearing the outfits you like & enjoy yourself, love, Helenmarie

    Joan Grey
    Member
    6 months ago

    Beautiful! Good for you!

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