What Crossdresser Heaven is all about

Well it is Monday January 11th, 2016 and I felt that I needed to write down what I was feeling after this weekend’s events. It was the latest example of what I think this site is all about and repeated the same wonderful results that I have seen time and time again these past few months.

When I read the forum posts and replies, I see so many people who have had unimaginable difficulties and pain in their lives-both as children or young adults or in their recent current lives. People who have suffered physical abuse, emotional blackmail, soul-searing cruelty…it literally breaks my heart sometimes to read their stories. When I am feeling sorry for myself over some slight that I experienced, I think of these members who have suffered so much just because they want to be true to what they are in their hearts and souls, and I feel ashamed that I compared the “inconveniences” that befell me to those punches in the gut.

But that’s not why I’m writing this post! The forum posts are one thing but the real tough times come when someone comes into the chat room hurting from an experience-either recent or well in the past. The emotions can be raw and there is no time to stop and think carefully about how to respond. You have to go with your gut instincts and pray that you don’t screw things up. I have had several experiences recently with this situation-I won’t mention the names of the people who were in crisis-they can reply in the comments if they so choose. And I think I was fortunate enough to NOT screw things up with any of them, but it was not ME who helped them—it was all of YOU! The members of the Crossdresser Heaven community!

People who didn’t even necessarily KNOW each other months, weeks or even days ago saw a person in need of a friend and responded by opening their hearts and welcoming and comforting the person in their darkest hours! It is making me tear up here at work as I write this to think of the love that is evident in the chat room and on this site. This most recent event, while there were many who helped, it was Ginger, Kali-Ann, Jane and Cricket who stepped up and helped draw out the words that needed to be said to have a catharsis for the member in crisis. And this time it was clear even at the time that things were better for the person who had worried that they would not be accepted if they told the truth about what was bothering them!

En Femme Style

Other times, we didn’t find out until later how the person did because they left the room still upset even after the room was trying to help them. The pain the person was feeling was so great that it took a day or two for the love and support each and every member in the room was giving to be felt and accepted by the person in crisis. This made the members who had helped while the person was in the chat room nervous wrecks until we got the blessed news the next day that the person was better! I know I slept fitfully that night worried that I had somehow failed to help in a time of need –that my words had somehow been the wrong ones to say and made things worse. But even that part showed the love and strength in the community as the members consoled me and helped me to calm down.

The love and support this community has for its own humbles me as I see it demonstrated time and time again. Folks helping other members to feel better about themselves, complimenting each others outfits and pictures, laughing and smiling with them at their successes, consoling and comforting them in their times of losses or failures, and being the family that so many of us need as we lose our biological families for being true to ourselves! IT is what a true family does and that is what I feel this community to be—MY FAMILY!

Anyway, I just felt led to share these feelings. Please thank Vanessa for all she has done to make this site a HOME for each of us! She could have finished her transition and left to live an anonymous life-happy with her partner. Instead she spends an enormous amount of time and energy and sacrifices a great deal to help others realize their dreams! Thank you Vanessa for all you do! And most importantly:
Thanks to ALL the members of Crossdresser Heaven for helping your fellow members make it through life a little happier and feeling a lot more loved! Please keep up the fantastic job you have been doing and support your friends here-old and new-and welcome all our new members each day with open arms and open hearts! I am proud to be a small part of this community and let me close by saying:



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skippy1965 Cynthia

The Original Cyn, or OC for short. Cynthia is from Richmond Virginia, she crossdresses every day (lucky gal!) and has a knack for tracking down niggling technical issues so we can fix them. She is also on a journey of self-examination to figure out where her feminine journey will lead her, and is always willing to talk with others about their feelings and questions or her own. Update January 2023- the above was written by Vanessa on my behalf back when I joined in 2015. So much has happened on my journey since then. From a shy CD who had hardly been outside as herself to being pretty much full time Cyn 24/7 now. I told work about me and started HRT last year. Everyone knows about me in my life now too. I've socially transitioned for the most part but not sure if I will do anything regarding legal name or any surgeries at all. It's taken mea long time to accept myself for who I am but the site has helped me reach that level of self-awareness. I say dating below but that's just the best status I can say. I have a friend who is very special to me that I HOPE will be more a life companion as time goes forward.

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Tracey Rose
Tracey Rose
8 years ago

Hi Cyn, The amazing thing between all of us is the amount of times the stories of each of us can be similar to others. We do all care for one another greatly. After decades of hiding away, I am truly coming out and you all and yes you too Cyn and my great friend, Connie, are helping me so much. Yesterday I was told, after another week of my journey and great support from CDH, “oh, turn around, I can see you clearly now, you are a woman" You would all know how lovely those words are to hear.… Read more »

8 years ago


Lucinda Hawkns
Trusted Member
8 years ago

we all have had our ups and downs on cross dressing, in or out of the closet. i am still in the closet, but went to a support group and went dressed up and walked in the room and was welcomed with open arms and i felt great and happy. the Buffalo Bells group helped me be my self and go out in public as a female and i really enjoyed that night. but for telling family members, Not. wife knows but wont help me with make up or just talk like two women. she wont see me when i… Read more »

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julianne w
8 years ago

Cynthia I too feel that this site has given me a hole new family of friends and each time I join a chat session or read a post I feel that much less alone . I agree my struggles are so much less than many on the site but have never felt trivialized by any one .I do wish to thank Vannesa for not just leaving us all behind but taking us on her journey and letting us grow around her and with her .Every day that goes by for me and I visit is another little step forward because… Read more »

7 years ago

Hi Cynthia,

Loved your article…you hit the nail on the head!

It is always great to have a positive influence in others lives.

We can get so much negative influence as it is with coming to grips with cross dressing and everything it entails, that some positive support and encouragement can be a breath of fresh air for some one in their darkest hour of need.

Thanks for all your efforts and the efforts of the CDH ambassadors, as well as CDH members standing in the gap!


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