Last time, I shared the experience of taking my dog out while dressed.  It was frightening and exhilarating all at once.   After that, I found the idea of being outside as Rachel, even if only briefly, was not as scary anymore.  I wasn’t ready to go downtown or anything yet, but something inside me said I wanted to take it to the next step.

Circumstances gave me a day off, home alone, on the same day the garbage and recycling collectors would be coming around.  A mad boldness seized me, and I quickly changing into my body shaper, bra, black legging, and a hot pink top.  Donning makeup and my blond wig, I went downstairs, and poured myself a cup of coffee.  Putting on my sunglasses, I went out onto the back porch. I sat down, crossed my legs, and waited.

My heart was beating faster with every moment.  I knew where I was — the sanitary workers could not help, but see me.   I kept thinking about what these men’s reactions to me would be.  Would they realize I was actually a man? What would they do?  I started thinking it was a bad idea, and considered going back inside. Then I heard it; the garbage truck was coming down the alley.  It was time to make a choice — do I stay and be seen, or do I play it safe and rush inside?

I made my choice.  Maybe I was not ready to announce this side of myself to the world, but no one was going to chase me off my own deck.  I sat, sipping my coffee, and enjoying the warm morning sunshine as the truck drew closer. After what seemed like an hour, the truck pulled up behind my house.  The men got out to grab the garbage.  I held my breath as one glanced up at me.  He looked at me momentarily . . . then nodded politely, grabbed the garbage, and tossed it into the back of the truck.  The truck and men soon drove off.  No one gave any sign that he thought I was anything other than a woman enjoying her morning coffee outside.

I sat there with my mind reeling at what had just happened before going inside.  That man had give me only a brief glance.  Yet, his lack of a reaction was thrilling; I could not have felt better.  I still have a ways to go to be passable, but this was a big step for me.

EnFemme

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rikki james
rikki james
6 years ago

My heart pounded as i read your story.

Joanna
Joanna
6 years ago

Hi Rachael, Your story is very similar to mine, I was staying in Harrogate with friends when it was suggested we walk around town and have a coffee break. Well walking down the hotel drive into the Main Street felt to me like jumping off the high diving board then realising you can’t swim. I was terrified. Everyone must be looking at me. They all know I’m a man in women’s clothes. But nothing happened. No remarks even though I know I was read. Eventually I ended up in Debenhams cafe thoroughly enjoying my new found freedom. Your lovely article… Read more »

pau
pau
6 years ago

idrove fromreading in uk to London and then went to night club and loved it

Akira Angle
Akira Angle
6 years ago

Hmm good

Nina Je t
Nina Je t'aime
6 years ago
Reply to  Akira Angle

Yes you are.

Pennygril Snow
Pennygril Snow
5 years ago

You look lovely and beautiful woman

Joanna Knight
Lady
Member
5 years ago

Rachel,
You have done one thing I haven’t done yet and that go outside in the day time! I am happy that you did so ! I now feel that I can do the same ! Go out in the day time!!

Love your sister,
Joanna

Bobbi
Bobbi
5 years ago

Good on you, girl!! I’m happy that you had positive experience! Most people are totally cool, even if they know you weren’t born a woman. They understand “Live & let live", The ones we have to worry about, are the “Trumpanzees" & the idiots from the AFA (American Family ASSN.). They actively seek out girls like us, just to make problems for us. Some day (hopefully soon) we’ll all be able to walk down any street without the “side eye", or people pulling their little children close to them as we walk toward them. THIS girl personally, doesn’t give a… Read more »

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