I don’t know about you ladies, but this Coronavirus has put quite a damper on my April time. For me, she has always been a release, but she has also been a way to express myself out in public. That option has been taken away from me for months by this virus, and I miss it. I really do. I don’t get the same satisfaction at home as I do when I am out and about – even just wandering the malls and buying nothing. I want to be seen – to tell the world that I am here and I am me and I won’t let anyone stop me from being the person I am – all the wonderful, joyous, and even the not so wonderful aspects of myself on display.

I know most of you have been afraid to be who you are at times. I was too, but when I finally got over that hurdle a whole new world opened to me; now that world has been placed on temporary hold. I miss it. I miss getting together with my girlfriends and going out to a show or to shop or just to get a drink. I know this temporary isolation will eventually end, but I also know that I need human contact, and I especially need the company of my friends; I call so many of you my friends. The internet is wonderful, but it is not really a substitute for personal contact.

So far I have cancelled three vacations this year – two CD/TG conferences and just now, I had to cancel a visit from a friend due to a resurgence of the virus.

Well… I have concluded that this virus is going to be around for awhile. I am going to find ways to express myself, even if it is behind a mask. I will use the time I’d set aside for my friend’s visit to explore Seattle. There is so much of the city that I don’t know, and I have lived here for almost 30 years. I’m going to check out the city to see and be seen. It is summer after all, so I will find a lovely spot or two outside to have a bite, get a drink, or just enjoy the sun and the scenery. There is still much to appreciate and be thankful for.

I am lucky to live near Seattle, a city that appreciates diversity and whose residents treat me with respect and kindness. I have a loving family that is relatively accepting, and my youngest daughter fully embraces me. My employer and fellow employees are accepting or at least tolerant, and I have never heard anything derogatory. At 62, I no longer worry about needing to find that “next job,” and I am free to express myself…within the limitations of this virus of course.

…And if this is the “new normal” (temporarily I hope,) I will adjust. I just know that there is still a lot that I CAN do – so I’m going to focus on doing what I can, and making sure that April is out there.

Be safe everyone, but don’t stop living.

Hugs, April


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April (Pacific Princess)

I have been crossdressing since about the age of 7, and took a 30+ year hiatus from dressing while I was busy raising my family. I started dressing again a few years ago, and at times I feel TG, and other times, simply someone who likes to crossdress. I finally like who I am though, and I am moving closer and closer to who I want to be, but I'm not quite sure who that is yet. My feelings go back and forth over time, yet I'm finally at peace with who I am and can't wait to keep moving forward.

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Olivia Livin
Trusted Member
3 years ago

Hi April,
I agree, I too for a time was desperately waiting to resume outside contact. Yes it can be somewhat tougher to get out and around during this but the possibilities are out there and we need to make the most of them. For the shy ones having to wear a mask can actually be a blessing in that it better disguises their identity.

Bettylou Cox
Bettylou Cox
3 years ago

HI April,

I can certainly relate to your desire to be seen, to be out in public. When everything shut down, I had to make do with trips to the grocer, but behind a mask. This mess will go on until everyone is either infected or inoculated; so prepare for the long haul.



skippy1965 Cynthia
Trusted Member
3 years ago

If y’all didn’t know, I am that friend who had to postpone my trip out to hang out with April- and YES it did stink to have to do so. I have been working from home since early March and will be at LEAST to the end of January 2021. I play league pool three nights a week and until that finally restarted when VA went to phase three on July 1st. The only people I saw were my sister who lives in my house and random strangers in Walmart every 7-10 days. On the bright said I spent those… Read more »

3 years ago

Hi April,
I completely understand. I WANT TO BE SEEN! I want to be out in public, without a mask.I have spent so much effort to perfect my feminine self/look, and I don’t want to cover it up. I’m very frustrated.
So, for all the girls out there feeling as I do, you are not alone. You are invincible.

Deborah Sullivan
Trusted Member
3 years ago

This should be over soon and we all know April how you feel as we do too. Was in Seattle last summer as Debbie with my b/f and had a glorious time. I enjoyed the tourist things in the city and I really enjoyed with no problems all the resturants and things in girl mode. Be patient it is almost over sis

Julie Shaw
3 years ago

Agreed – normally I manage to get out 4 or 5 times a month. I have left the house 3 times since March! (sheesh)

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