Last night my wife and I were watching the episode of Boston Legal where Clarence – the otherwise shy unassuming lawyer who enjoys crossdressing in his spare time – enters a singing competition as his alter ego Clarice. We watched the dramatic transformation – his feminine persona shone radiantly with confidence when she set foot on stage. Singing, dancing and shaking her booty with freewheeling abandon. As if crossdressing psychology had dazzled her mind and switched her personality.
After the show my wife asked me a question which got me thinking about my crossdressing personality. Am I more confident and outgoing when dressed as Vanessa? Does my personality change in ways not easily explained by being more feminine?
What Is My Crossdressing Personality?
When I put on my makeup, heels and hose I become more feminine, more outgoing, more confident, more excitable, less contemplative, less uncertain and more open to being vulnerable. When I’m in male mode I’m constantly worried about what people will think of me. I try to be perfect, to not offend anyone, I shape who I am to fit into the person I believe others want me to be. When the transvestite inside of me comes out I realize that I’ve probably already offended some people. I don’t mold myself to their expectations, but find myself free to be who I am inside.
It’s a strange balance. I find myself less interested in what others think about me and more interested in them. Even a light dusting of makeup and a feminine mindset will find me chatting with cashiers in the checkout line, willing to share a piece of my day and eager to hear a bit more about theirs.
In truth I like who I am when I’m crossdressed. I think that if there was socially acceptable cross dressing more people would feel comfortable expressing a different side of themselves. We may even find that crossdressing psychology is sometimes the best kind of psychology.
What Is Your Crossdressing Personality?
Does your experience mirror mine? Think about what it’s like when you’re the woman of your dreams. Who do you become when you’re dressed?
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P.S. When you’re crossdressed be fabulous on the inside and the outside! Learn the makeup secrets of the stars and look like a Hollywood goddess.
Vanessa is a happily married 30 year old transgendered woman from Seattle. It's been a long road to acceptance for her, despite the fact that she has been crossdressing for more than 25 years. Sometimes, when she looks in the mirror she longs to see the girl that lives
within her. 
33 Comments
I become very cheerful and relaxed when i dress up as a girl as the fun I have changing into different outfits is just addicting as i love it sooo much. Trying to pick out the outfit I will wear to this years halloween party is a challenge as there are so many combinations I could put together. I also know if i go and look really cute that others might think I am a secret crossdresser as I could care less.
I feel very relaxed and more myself, im happyer more out going and full of confdince. i hate haveing to go to work dressed as a man but im still working my way out of the closet and working to become more passable.I will not be truly happy untill i am. most of my friends dont know the girl in me and im so scared ill lose them if they knew.
Likewise, it’s a struggle to present at work as someone you’re not. It’s great that you’ve found acceptance in who you are though Krisy.
Hugs,
Vanessa
Krisy – what a great phot would love to chat to you. Take care!
Kandi Gurl
hi,can i meet u,,,u can mail me on sus69xxx@yahoo.com
hi am with a 7inch hot and wild tool ,,,am in jhb,,love to meet som crossdresser to have some hot fun,,looking for long term relationship,,mail me on sus69xxx@yahoo.com
Hi sus, I did reply to you on the direct email, hope you got it. Only noticed this other one when i checked out where you got my email from. As I said in the other email I do like meeitng new people and you do sound interesting. But I need to know more about you. Kandi is not a slut or a hooker or a call girl but a very respectable girl looking for some fun with a nice guy. I am sure you are a nice guy but you need to tell me more about yourself and what you are doing in Joburg etc and what you would like to do with Kandi. About the 7″ hot tool this does sound interesting but you should know that to most girls its not the size that counts but what you can do with it!!! Having said that I am very glad you contacted me, but just remember Kandi will need to see a pic of you and to know more about you and meet and chat a bit and get to know you before any 7″ tools are brought out of their pants. Did send you a photo of me earlier in the other email. Take Care. sorry if I sound a bit strict but its worth it believe me!!
XXXX
Kandi
hi all.im from Richards bay,South Africa….im a born crossdresser,who only ever wear panties,and crossdress fully when im alone….id like to know if there s any others in my area
Hi, I am a CD in JHB would love to chat. shiplake@hotmail.co.uk
Hi, Kandi Gurl loves to dress up. I live in Joburg. Would love to chat more and maybe meet and hang out and dress up and chat and maybe more. Kandi Gurl is a bit horny but can also be a good friend.
Hi Kandi Gurl.
I am in JHB too!!!
Looking forward to hearing from you.
Sarah
XXX
Hi Sarah, lovely to hear from you so soon! I am a 55 year old white male (when I am not dressed up!) I suppose. Have recently fulfilled my life long suppressed fantasy of dressing up as a woman. It is just sooooo cool I love it!!! I feel liberated, confident, excited and have never had so much fun in all my life in the last few days (yes its that new but there were always suppressed signs – la la la life story – blah blah blah). Along wiht the absolute fun side of it which is awesome and so wondeful also comes wanting to share this with like minded and dressed people and if we become friends do dress ups and shopping and stuff that would be great. Also really look forward to having some sexual adventures with my new persona. Kandi Gurl is a bit horny too (ooh you are awful) but there are so many aspects to this new found level of being that that is not what it is all about! Lets chat more and exchange pics or whatever!! I live in Fairlands in Joburg. Please tell me more about yourself. I just have to rush out to a business meeting now (I am a media consultant). BUT – on the way I am going to exchange a new beautiful dress which is a tad too small – looks good but cant get the zipper all the way up!!! Not that I’m enormous or something its a size 10 – need a twelve – it is gorgeous and blue – amazing fabric – hope they have a bigger size but can always exchange it for something else. Take care now. – Kandi Gurl
Hi Kandi,
Thanks for the prompt message. I am a white guy 49 and I live in Fourways. I have had this urge to dress for many years and recently it became quite a regular regime for me to dress every day. I had a break from it and gave all my clothes and sexy shoes away but the lure of dressing is becoming strong again. I would love your comments on some of my pics and would love to spend some time dressing in company, posing etc. Please feel free to email me on shiplake@hotmail.co.uk. Good luck with the dress!!!
Sarah
XXX
thank you sweety..0832063349
Hey Danielle, I just got a comment from Sarah who is in Johannesburg (see the post Where do I find Crossdressing Support)>.
i will thank you kind lady.
Hi Danielle, I guess it is very hot there in Richards Bay and you have the appropriate clothing. Aren’t summer clothes great. I am very new to this an have a limited supply of good womens wear. But will be rapidly expanding my wardrobe as I am so excited about finally breaking out of a life long straight jacket that I just want to dress up all the time. Today I am in my male clothes but Kandi, like you is underneath my Levis with a very beuatiful black thong pantie with detailing on it that fits snugly – yummy. Take care – - Kandy
hi girl..thanx..know the feeling….isnt it nice to tell someone openly that you wear panties and dresses.
Hi,
I would dearly love to live a life that recognises the female side of my nature; whether or not it involves a transition or acceptance of my true potential.
I am very open to supportive comments from my new friends. I am also 100% genuine and very chatty. Please contact me if you feel that you and I can help each other.
Please call me whatever you want as Steve seems quite inappropriate
Hello Steve, or may I call you Stephanie. You have picked a wonderful place to be open at. This site is all about supporting all our sisters, wherever you may be in this vast and varried world called transgenderism. Any time you want to chat with me , I am available to listen and share with you or any of our other friends. I have been crossdressing for as long as I can remember, and I love the total person that I’ve become. That’s really the first step in the whole process, Love yourself, no matter where you are on the road to being all that you want to be. Once you are there, the rest is a breeze. Looking foreward to chatting soon, Ragina.
Ragina, thanks dear for being so wonderfully supportive!
Vanessa you look great in your pic and Vanessa is a lovely name – would love to chat to you and get to know you better. You can contact me directly on email: kevinhumphrey@vodamail.co.za and I can send you some pics of me too!
See ya
Kandi Gurl
Ragina – you are just lovely, great advice would love to chat more with you too.
XXX
Kandi Gurl
Hello luv,
You say that you are in Johanesburg. I’m in Georgia, USA. I’d love to chat about anything, especially cd. I’ve posted my e-mail for you to use. Please feel free to contact me.
Hello again. sorry I forgot to leave my contact. Reach me at: rswarmergi@aol.com
Hope to chat soon.
Hi Ragina, just taking a bit of a break to say hi to you. You all the way over there in Georgia. Of course there has been some very romantic songs about Georgia -’rainly nights in etc… In fact it is pouring down here in Johannesburg right now and has been for two days. I am a 55 year old white person (not that that really means anything and I hate to be categorised). Of course living in Africa it is fantastc especially since this country has changed its horrible racist past (although some still lingers). I have two kids from two different wives (both fantastic kids) and only recently di I realise a buried dream of dressing as a girl. Should have done it when I was young and beautiful but well really better late than never. I am now grappling with several issues about my sexuality. Am attracted to guys that look like girls, straight ordinary beautifual girls (like my beautifual wife) and also it seems to quite straightish men – but very particular about that – it does not come easy. Have not had any physical experiences since I started dressing and look forward to that with the right person. Gee I’m awful chatty here. Must be because I am editing (I do writing, editing and all sorts of media stuff for a living) a rather dry paper on the effects of the internet on marketing architectural services for some academics at our university here. so needed a break from that … so over to you lets get to know each other you sound like a very wise person. Take care
i want to know guys who like to dress as girls to show me how to do it i’m a very shy guy but i like to do it my self i want to meet some one to have fun together and some thing else.
I am new here so hello to all. when i dress it is by myself no one has ever known, i feel who i am supose to be when dressed even in the simplest ways i get losed in that time but when my wife comes home i must go back, and it is hard to seem like nothing is wrong but i get though it. would love to talk more. Stacy
Hi would love to chat. Have recently been through an experience with my wife which has been very fulfilling as we now go shopping together. Yesterday she bought me a dress!!!
Hi i am a straight guy visiting Jburg for several meeting. I like to meet crossdresser..Please reach me by email..barissahiner@windowslive.com
Hi Baris, Kandi Gurl would love to know more about you. When will you be here in Johannesburg? What do you look like when you are dressed up? Can send you a photo of me. Contact me directly on kevinhumphrey@vodamail.co.za and tell me more about yourself and we can exchange some pics.
Hey girls how do I get my photo next to my comments like some others have?
I enjoy cding too. hope to be able to dress all the way someday