For most of my early years up through college and the military I pretty much kept my hair very short. Even though I was occasionally dressing up I was very closeted and had bought an inexpensive wig just to compliment whatever I decided to actually dress up with.
By then I was married and was working jobs that were not conducive to having long hair, so I kept it short. Eventually I had an office-type job that was very liberal and could care less about hair length so I took advantage and decided to let it grow out and, to my surprise, it grew very straight, thick, and very fast. Before long, my hair was lush and down to my shoulders. Taking advantage of this opportunity I also began to dress up in earnest. My dressing became more than a desire; it became an obsession!
My wife, at first, was not bothered much by my occasional dressing and never objected to my hair length which, by then, went past my waist. Wearing it that long meant I had to figure out how to wear it up so it wouldn’t be in the way all the time so mostly it was gathered up on top of my head in a bun or a long ponytail down my back.
At first I thought taking care of my hair would be problematic. It turns out all I needed to do, besides washing and conditioning, was brush it and leave it alone. Eventually I thought I should try and see if I could have it styled which turned out to be a challenge. A stylist worked on it a few times and, while I liked waves and curls she commented on how stubborn my hair was to style. My hair was stubborn and bobby pins, barrettes and other clips wouldn’t stay in. I really couldn’t afford the bi-weekly visits to the salon so I pretty much asked my wife to give me a monthly trim and keep the length down to my shoulders. Eventually I found ways to tame my hair and have it behave.
Raising my hair has caused a few stories, however.
During the time I started to let it grow my older brother teased me quite a bit. I was defensive about it but that didn’t stop him, of course. He ran a car repair shop and I worked there for a summer helping out. My hair was almost to my shoulders by this time and I think I was wearing just a headband to hold it in place. One day he had me crawl under a car, for what reason I’ve forgotten. To do the job I had to get on a “creeper”, one of those low-slung, 4-wheeled carts used by mechanics to access under a car without jacking it up. You can probably guess what happened. Getting under was fine, but getting back out was when the drama started. Rolling back out some of my hair got trapped in one of the wheels! Rolling back and forth only made it worse. I knew yelling for help would only make my brother laugh and tease me even more than usual so I did the only thing I could think of and yanked my head up far enough to rip a sizeable amount of hair out and it coiled in the wheel. I didn’t say anything and acted normal as I rolled out. What choice did I have? While my brother was occupied elsewhere I managed to remove the evidence and nothing was ever said but my scalp paid a costly price. I lost about an inch and a half diameter hunk of hair! After that I also had a few occasions of catching my blowing loose hair in the wind while rolling up my car window but I wised up and was always able to rescue myself from losing any more hair.
One year my wife and I decided to see if my hair would dread up, just for fun. She made small braids in my hair and I wore it like that for a couple months but decided I didn’t like it and asked her to un-braid it. It was a warm summer day so we went outside and it took about an hour to remove the rubber bands and untwist the braids. As I shook my head around to help my hair free itself we felt a very strong and sudden shaking in the ground. An earthquake! We stood there, amazed, as we watched the trees and utility poles sway while we tried to stay upright. It was over in, maybe, a minute or two. As we were trying to gather our wits we heard a voice coming from a house across an alley behind and above us. “You okay down there?” the neighbor asked. We both sort of laughed and made some trite comments like “Oh yeah!” and “That was a big one!” It wasn’t till after we went back into our house that I looked in the mirror and I realized my hair, now totally unbraided, was standing out in all directions all over my head, like a cartoon character. It was then that I realized why the neighbors seemed so concerned. They already knew I wore my hair long and straight, so they must have thought the earthquake scared the bejesus out of me from fright.
There is one very odd thing that my hair does by itself. I enjoy finger-combing my hair when it is down but occasionally I will feel a thick spot, like a snag, near the bottom of a single strand. When I singled out this one hair I looked through a microscope and found that one hair tied itself into a knot about an inch or two from the bottom. I had no idea what caused it but I did a little research and subsequently found that this happens to others. Some say that split ends can be the culprit but I rarely have those. Or it is a result of having curly, coily hair but my hair is very straight. I have come to not worry about how and why it happens, I just clip off the knot above the knot.
Remarkably I have noticed only a few gray hairs appearing now and then but I just ignore them. My hair does what it wants and I have very little control over it.
Thanks for taking the time to read my hair raising article! Please take a few minutes to either send in a comment to my article or an answer to one or more of my questions posed to you below:
- When you dress up in full up femme mode, do you wear a wig or use your own natural hair?
- How many wigs do you own in your selections of wigs?
- What color and length of hair do you think is the best fit for you while you’re getting your total girl on?
I look forward to your comments or answers to my questions.
Most sincerely, Mary
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Hi Mary, I enjoyed reading your article. My hair is very similar, long, straight, no gray and has a mind of its own. I love, love, love the bow, it’s soooo cute. I must have one now, probably more, probably a lot more. lol
Hi Michelle, I wear all sorts of things in my hair, from bobby pins and barrettes to ribbons and bows. It’s so much fun to play with our hair, isn’t it?
It really is! I have hair bands and scrunchies, but hadn’t thought about a bow until now. Thank you sooo much!
I forgot to thank you for enjoying my article. It’s been fun writing them.
Unfortunately, I need to wear a wig, balding. A CD friend told me about a store that caters to women recovering from breast cancer and the like. They sell among other things; breast forms and wigs. The two ladies there were very helpful and were not in the least put off by me being a cross dresser. They fitted me with a wig and breast forms and bra. I think they enjoyed themselves, having me try on different colours and styles. I finally decided on a mid length wig over the ears with a similar colour to my natural hair.… Read more »
Hi Jenna. It is nice to find kind, helpful people. The ladies in the store you went to is how most of us wanted to be treated. The haters in this world need to realize that hate just creates more hate. Why would anyone want to act that way?
Thank you! They were two lovely ladies. They went above and beyond for me. They certainly fussed over me. I am still supposed to back dressed for them.
That’s how it should be! Good for you and them,
I really enjoyed your article and I can relate to having to keep my hair short for most of my life. Having hair is wonderful and who among us doesn’t value the beautiful and natural hair we see most women enjoying. While I truly value my hair, having it can be somewhat of a curse, as experienced by women. It seems my wife is never satisfied with her hair, which in my opinion is wonderful. For girls and women, their experience with hair begins almost at birth, with Moms attending to it routinely until that are able to manage it… Read more »
Hi Carla. That’s so wonderful you have a trusted hair stylist, especially one who was able to give you such a versatile cut. As I mentioned in my story my hair does not like to be styled and seems to have a life of it’s own. That is why I usually just keep it in a ponytail or a bun on top of my head. I’m with you about having a mom to share those mysterious female secrets that almost all girls gain growing up. Even though I think she knew I wanted to dress in her things she, like… Read more »
Thank you Mary, I have been so fortunate to be able to enjoy being Carla, although mostly in my later years. I hope to see and hear more from you.
carla
Wonderful article! Never experienced an earthquake, I can see where that would be a hair-raising experience. Lol… I’ve only recently started to let my hair grow. I couldn’t get it cut during COVIT and it grew long enough to put it into a ponytail. I was very surprised when my wife said she liked it long and didn’t want me to cut it. It’s now past my shoulders and I’m really enjoying playing with it. When I’m in fem mode I’m still wearing a wig because I haven’t mastered how to do things with my own hair and it is… Read more »
Hi Lacy, I’m guessing earthquakes don’t happen where you live. Not only do we have quakes but this part of the country also has the Ring of Fire which includes not only Mt Rainier which is currently dormant but only about 80 miles from here and Mt St. Helens which erupted is about 100 miles and is still active. Yes, it is fun when you can grow your hair out. I’ve let mine grow down past my rear but it really gets in the way so I keep it much shorter now. Luckily my wife cuts it to shoulder length.… Read more »
No, we don’t have earthquakes in the Midwest. My hair is only just past my shoulders and it does get in the way a lot. I don’t know when or if I will ever cut it. My wife says I should let it grow all the way down my back like hers. I’m still up in the air on that one. One thing I really dislike is to wear it in a man bun. I usually wear it in a ponytail. When I’m feeling feminine I will tie it with a pink hair tie. I always find it fun to… Read more »
I wear bows, ribbons, barettes and such quite often. My hair is stubborn, though, and wants to toss them out so I sometimes lose them.
Had my hair down just below the shoulders for 10 years and so enjoyed playing with it like you Mary and wearing it in different styles. Used curlers at times for a wave and had several perms over the years including highlights. My hair stylist even pinned it up on several occasions for an updo and I adored it. The problem of course was swimming so I used a ladies swim cap with it tucked in. I loved all the different styles wearing it in a high ponytail or a bun or barrettes headbands and bows at times. Unfornately with… Read more »
Hi Deborah, It’s nice to know that it seems like quite a few girls have grown their hair out. It used to be such a sacrilege to do that! I’ve also used curlers big and small and even worn them overnight to get a good set as well as used a curling iron but usually I have it in some sort of updo. My hair is shorter too but it still grows like mad. My wife swears she can watch it grow, LOL. I get occasional grey hairs but what the heck, it’s still hair! I have but one wig… Read more »
Learning to sleep in curlers like me I see. good for you sweetie
A girl has to get used to being uncomfortable if the necessity arises!
Hi Mary,
Some years ago I had hair halfway down my back. I got it caught in the wheel of a mechanic’s creeper once just like you described. My hair was a bit finer, so it kind of broke near the wheel, but it sure still hurt! I would still have it that length if it didn’t get so thin. It was worth the extra time, and effort every day. I loved it!
Don’t ever cut your gorgeous hair! You are beautiful!
Hi Lara,
A yes, Wisconsin, the Cheese Curtain or so my friends from there call it Wow. I’m not the only one trapped by a creeper. It sure did hurt! Luckily my hair still grows fast and thick so I hack it off every once in awhile because it gets in the way. Thank you for the compliment!
Stay pretty, Mary
Thanks Mary, your article was amazing. I have my own hair longer than my shoulders. I have similar problem with them. Thanks for sharing